CSA - DNA test (Private) Advice for a friend.

Lionbar1990

Hi Guys,
Posting this on behalf of a friend, he had unprotected sex with a girl a few times (stupid I know!) she got pregnant and the baby is now 1 years old.
At the time he thought he was the father so put his name on the birth certificate and they arranged payments through csa and he has no contact with the child due to complications with the mother and her getting a new boyfriend who already has kids and was willing to bring him up as his own. However it has now come to light that the baby could not be his, he has found a few things out - there are rumours she was having unprotected sex with other guys and the baby looks nothing like him, no charecteristics or anything, I know he shouldn't base his argument on this but he is willing to pay for a DNA. CSA have refused him a DNA with them due to him not saying anything at the beginning. He is willing to go private and has sourced out some private DNA facilities that the CSA would accept, however he has no contact with the mother so how can he ensure she will take the test and get it to her?
Any advice will be highly appreciated.

clearingout

It will probably need to go through court. The CSA will refuse on the basis that he has accepted paternity to date - he would have needed to deny it at the point a case was opened. I guess this is very frustrating if evidence of 'sleeping around' comes to light at a later date but it is their rules so he has been correctly advised on that matter.

He can't force the woman concerned to take a DNA test. He will need to go through the courts if she refuses. Has he spoken to her and has she agreed? He needs to make sure that the test is CSA/court approved (Cellmark is the company that the CSA use, for reference). It would be worth a google, I guess, and have a look at their website and what their procedures are. If the test is done through the CSA, it has to have the swab taken by your GP and photos are signed to say who attended.

I would expect resistance on behalf of the woman concerned - she's receiving maintenance and has got on with her life. I would be wary of believing rumours - so many people seem to get caught up in this. At a year old, babies don't generally look like their parents (others may disagree) so I wouldn't give this a second thought. However, I can appreciate the need to know, particularly where the exchange of money is taking place!

Lionbar1990

Thanks for that Clearingout.


He hasn't spoken to her for a while, it looks bad on his behalf and I don't agree with what he has done but these were his choices, he has no contact details for her either.

Do you know?

Is it just a case of going to court and they say yes you can have a DNA if you pay for it or would he have to present them a case as to why he wants a DNA to be taken?

RAS

There was one instance on here i think - or maybe the families forum where a very shocked couple discovered after a DNA test that he was the father of a 12 year old with whose mother he agreed he had slept a few times. She had also had sex with other men over the same time period.

The shocking thing was that this man was the third who had provided a sample for a DNA test; one had been paying CSA for several years before discovering he was not the father.

clearingout

I can only tell you my experience which is very different - my now ex husband and I conceived a child the same week as he left me for another woman and he denied paternity. CSA agreed to a test but he failed to complete the paperwork so working within their rules, they assumed paternity (there is nothing to assume, it is totally certain!). We were in court a few weeks later over our other children (long story) and his solicitor said that there was 'doubt' over our youngest's paternity. Given that I had paperwork from the CSA that said 'Mr Clearingout says he's not the father of Master Clearingout so you're going to have to have a DNA test' and then more paperwork that said 'Mr Clearingout refused to do a DNA test so here's your new assessment with Master Clearingout included', the judge told my ex he wouldn't order a test. He has not yet asked me for a private test - almost 2 years later. I would happily do it if he asked. He won't. He has no doubts - he was just trying to prove something to the girlfriend, I think! Your friend's situation is very different.

I would assume that your friend will need to present some kind of case to the court as to why he thinks a paternity test is required. I should think they would Order one if there is sufficient 'hearsay' as to the woman's antics but he would need to be careful how he presents the information. I would suggest trying Families Need Fathers as they are pretty experienced in all matters related to dads and rotten relationships! Is he sure someone isn't just trying to mess with his head?

Lionbar1990

I think he just wants to belive the child isn't his and hearing these things and seeing pictures of the child has persuaded him to try and get a DNA test, he is also getting married therefore kind of wants this to be put to bed one way or another...

Thanks for all your help.

kevin137

I would suggest that maybe he writes to the girl/mother of the baby in question, and suggest that while this is ongoing and because of the rumours that have been circulating it may be a good idea for a DNA test, and that he will continue to pay unto the date the results are sent back and after if proved to be his. That he holds no ill will against her should it be proved that the child is not his and that he needs to know 100% because of these rumours as it is stopping him from moving on with his life and making decisions about his future and if he will have more children etc.

Appeal to her better nature assuring her it is not to try and move back into the childs life, but that he would like to receive updates from time to time and send cards etc for special events.

You may just be surprised by the outcome, and at least he will of tried to be civil about it. Failing that, surely if his name is on the birth certificate then he can apply for parental responsibility and if granted then have a right to collect dan from the child if that is what he decides. I don't know exactly how this works, i'm sure someone will know the law here regarding this.