wanchai's vintage wedding thread!

wanchai_2

Hello all

We are recently engaged and starting to plan our wedding for summer 2012 (date TBC). I am very excited but also astounded at the cost of everything!! :rotfl:

We would like to save money wherever possible but still have a lovely intimate wedding with good food, drink and entertainment. We love vintage and retro styles and shabby chic, so hope to incorporate this into the wedding. I would be eternally grateful for any suggestions whatsoever from you lovely people and will be reading this forum avidly from now on!

OK, so here is our budget:

Reception for 100 guests: £5,000 (o.m.g.)

Photographer: £1,500 (not very MSE at all, but I really want the best possible photos)

Videographer: £300

Wedding dress: £700 (hopefully less!)

My shoes and accessories: £200

Bridesmaid's dress and shoes: £120

Suit for OH: £250 (just a normal suit, not a 'wedding' suit - his best man already has a really good suit in the same colour)

Band: £700 (actual quote - think this is quite good, they are a swing band playing for 2 hours)

DJ: £200 or free (iPod and speakers possibly?)

Car: free (getting a friend to drive us)

Cake: free (my very talented friend is making it)

Church/organist: £200

Singers in church: free (two female relatives of mine)

Gifts for bridesmaid, best man and mothers: £100

Decorating the venue: £120

Flowers: £300

I know the flowers budget is probably ridiculously low but we are being optimistic! We need 2 bouquets and about 4 buttonholes - the rest we are going to decide on depending on cost. We may use dried lavender and gyp, or garden flowers for the tables. For the church, we might do the same, with gauze ribbons on the pews.

For those who are doing favours for us, we will buy them gifts to say thank you, so that will add about £200 to the budget.

Total so far = £9,890 but I know that this is probably optimistic.

Any comments??? Have I missed something? Where can we save money? xx

Hollie84

wow ok our whole wedding is costing £3500
My venue is costing £1450 thats with 37 for wedding breakfast and 70 for evening buffet even though we have around 80/90 coming,most wont want to eat after the 3 course meal plus there will be plenty to go around,we get the use of 3 different rooms,arrival drinks and drinks to toast.cake stand and knife and table linen and our room for sleep and brekkie

have you thought about having artificial flowers? means u can keep them then
i noticed you didnt have wedding stationary on there? i have just bought all my blanks and me and MIL are doing them ourselves (she makes cards)
i paid £250 for my dress in a sample sale should have been £600 reduced to £300 then they knocked another £50 off for me to have a lace up back put in which my mums friend is doing for next to nothing anyway

i got my shoes of ebay BN £28
my veil for £38,lady knocked it down from £80 for us
my tiara for £30 and its proper swarkovski crystal from a local lady on FB
is the price for the church a define? my quote was £593
i have bought personalised ivory cufflinks for the groom,best man and dad total of £15 posted
BM's are our daughters,im having a personalised swarkovski crystal bracelet made for them by the lady who is doing my tiara £17 each
what about favours and table decs? im doing my own,ikea vases and ebay for the organza bags,mirror plates off the net and scatter crystals and flowers from ebay
to hire a wedding suit will only be around £100 men are having wedding suits £100.59p each to hire that would save you £150 and u can hie a normal suit
I think personally u can get a very good photographer cheaper than that the one near me is excellent and only £500 luckily for me FIL is one so we get that free
also £200 to buy other gifts who have helped is crazy,its your day im sure u can get a few bouquets of flowers if you need to for less than £50 a florist in my town does bouquets for £12 and there lovely,we will get a few of them the day before

sammy_wheeler

wanchai wrote: »

Hello all

We are recently engaged and starting to plan our wedding for sumemr 2012 (date TBC). I am very excited but also astounded at the cost of everything!! :rotfl:

We would like to save money wherever possible but still have a lovely intimate wedding with good food, drink and entertainment. We love vintage and retro styles and shabby chic, so hope to incorporate this into the wedding. I would be eternally grateful for any suggestions whatsoever from you lovely people and will be reading this forum avidly from now on!

OK, so here is our budget:

Reception: £5,000 (o.m.g.) wow-is this a defininate quote from a venue you want? this is a huge part of your budget

Photographer: £1,500 (not very MSE at all, but I really want the best possible photos) Expensive does not mean the best possible photos. Some people on here have had free photographers- student ones, friends, family doing it. Book photographer you like and like their work- not just based on price. Mine was £500 for the full day- album, engagement shoot, and full copyright of all the photos on a cd, boudair shoot and album. I found her from photography parlour forum. Look around!

Videographer: £300

Wedding dress: £700 (hopefully less!) mine was £250. can be done for less than £700

My shoes and accessories: £200 mine was £90 althogther- shoes from ebay- and accessories rom the net

Bridesmaid's dress and shoes: £120

Suit for OH: £250 (just a normal suit, not a 'wedding' suit - his best man already has a really good suit in the same colour)

Band: £700 (actual quote - think this is quite good, they are a swing band playing for 2 hours) do you need a band and dj? think about the timing of the day and will it be too much etc

DJ: £200 or free (iPod and speakers possibly?)

Car: free (getting a friend to drive us) good

Cake: free (my very talented friend is making it) good

Church/organist: £200

Singers in church: free (two female relatives of mine)

Gifts for bridesmaid, best man and mothers: £100

Decorating the venue: £120

Flowers: £300- mine was less than this- for my bouquet, 3 bms bouquets, 7 centrepieces, 3 big arrangements, pedestals, 6 button holes. So your budget itsnt too low to be honest!

I know the flowers budget is probably ridiculously low but we are being optimistic! We need 2 bouquets and about 4 buttonholes - the rest we are going to decide on depending on cost. We may use dried lavender and gyp, or garden flowers for the tables. For the church, we might do the same, with gauze ribbons on the pews.

For those who are doing favours for us, we will buy them gifts to say thank you, so that will add about £200 to the budget.

Total so far = £9,890 but I know that this is probably optimistic.

Any comments??? Have I missed something? Where can we save money? xx

My whole wedding was under £5k- so it can be done- and loads of people have done it for under that- by miles

have another look at your budget and see what you think
and congrats

FutureCooper

First impressions - thats a big budget!!! I've cost mine out around £3,500. Thats for 30 day guests and a total of 120 evening. Hotel venue, food and wine = £1500

Your photographer budget is huge - I am researching this element for myself at the moment and most experienced photographers charge around the £650 mark for the day inc. copyright to all pics.

Our band cost is £400 for the evening and we have been to see them elsewhere and they are brilliant. Definetly use an iPod with your own playlist for during the meal and between band sets. Our band says they will plug it in through their speaker system for us.

I am having the vintage look too with a theme of 'Buttons' and i am making my own button bouquet this is saving a fortune on flowers. For the reception how about huge headed flowers, cut them short and put them in jam jars and clean baked beans tins! you could tie lace or ribbon around the vessels to tie in with your theme. This will cut costs hugely (again something i plan on doing). Or use cups and saucers you could get from flee markets or charity shops.

Hope thats a little help and as soon as you get your date set i suggest you join the forum of other brides during that month. The other brides have been a massive help and support for me!!

Tiara_2

When we were working out our budget, we decided on which things really mattered to us and we didn't want to compromise on, and which things we were not fussed about and could either do cheaply or do without.
The venue was something we didn't want to compromise on, as was the photographer and my dress. Obviously it depends on how many guests you are inviting and whereabouts in the country you are, but if these things are very important to you both then your budget to me looks good.

We weren't fussed about fancy cars, so we're not having them. We're getting a cheap cake from M&S and I'm only having one bridemsaid to save pennies (and arguments!).

Definitely go to meet lots of photographers- wedding fairs are really good for this. We had a £1k budget for a photographer as we didn't want to compromise on the quality of our pictures. I was astounded that many of the photographers we liked wanted £2k-£3k for taking pictures for the day and an album :eek: We spoke to loads of photographers and in the end the one we both liked best and who's work blew us away came in bang on budget. Definitely take the time and do the research to find the one who's style you love

You may be able to save on the dress by finding one on preloved/ebay/ or in a shop sample sale. Just beware the cost of alterations- a bargain dress in the wrong size can end up costing a lot to put right!

Also, if you go for a weekday wedding you can get substantial discounts on the venue, and potentially photographer as well, so this may be worth considering.

ETA- if you have saved up or are saving up and can afford it, and it's important to you both, then fair play to you and good luck with the planning. However if you would need to take out a loan to fund any of this, then I would strongly consider you scale down some of the costs if you can. Starting off married life in debt can take the shine off your special day, particularly if you're still paying for it years down the line.

kirbyca

Hello,

Our wedding is costing about 7k but that includes absolutally everything in a top venue for 55 day guests and 150 evening guests:

If you want to cut your budget you need to learn to negotiate.

I agree 5k for the Reception is far too expensive, does this include everything?

Table linnen (This should be included)

Top table swagger

Cake table

Wedding breakfast (Max £30 per head)

Seatting plan (make your own to match the invites)

Name cards (e-bay 99p for 25)

Drinks package (about £8 per person)

Evening buffet (Max £15 per person)

Overnight accomodation (look for a local B&B some are nicer than hotels and cost half the price)!

Room hire (This is free in most venues)

Toast master (Try and get this included)

You also need to account for:

Table decorations (do your own - insperations wholesale (£12 a table then put them on on e-bay once done)

Wedding invites (£300) unless you buy budget or do as we did, buy the materials from e-bay and do them yourselves this adds a personal touch total spend £60.

Wedding favours - these can be as cheap as you want, organza bags with chocolates in are the most common and cheapest.

Chair covers - Buy them off e-bay for a fraction more than hiring and once done put them back on e-bay this will save you money in the long run, (if your having them).

Photographer - We have for £1200 but this includes full copy right CD of 3000 plus images, two photographers on the day from 0800hrs through until the end, a photo story book, and personal wedding photographs ready and framed to give out as gifts during the speaches. Look around.

Wedding dress - not my domain but the missus has budgeted £300 tops.

Shoes & accessories - £200 no one sees them really they are usually under your dress... again the wife to be has budgeted £100.

Bridesmaid's dress and shoes: £120 sound about right.

Suit for OH: You can get suits a lot cheaper, I am hiring 6 suits for £425.00

Band: £ ours is free but in general they charge between £400 & £500, visit some pubs where bands are playing and find one you like and get a quote.

DJ: £200 is about right, you dont want to be doing your own music this is a hastle!

Car: free - the right way to do it!

Cake: free - my sister is making ours.

Church/organist: £400 is what we are paying.

Gifts for bridesmaid, best man and mothers: £100

Flowers: £300- We have about £250 aside for this as quoted by a florist, bare in mind that not everyone needs button holes, just buy them for the groom etc... This saves a small fortune.

Any more questions give me a shout.

lollyb84

wanchai wrote: »

Hello all

We are recently engaged and starting to plan our wedding for sumemr 2012 (date TBC). I am very excited but also astounded at the cost of everything!! :rotfl:

We would like to save money wherever possible but still have a lovely intimate wedding with good food, drink and entertainment. We love vintage and retro styles and shabby chic, so hope to incorporate this into the wedding. I would be eternally grateful for any suggestions whatsoever from you lovely people and will be reading this forum avidly from now on!

OK, so here is our budget:

Reception for 100 guests: £5,000 (o.m.g.)

Photographer: £1,500 (not very MSE at all, but I really want the best possible photos) As suggested - I'd look again at this. We paid £650 for our Photographer. If you let us know where you are, people might have some recommendations

Videographer: £300 -Absolutely not a criticism, as I understand some people want one, but do you need a professional videographer. My now BIL filmed our ceremony and the speeches on his camera, and thats all we needed. In reality how many times are you going to watch it? (Disclaimer - I have friends that watch their video every year, and friends that have never watched them at all - I'm just asking the OP to consider if this is something that is important to them)

Wedding dress: £700 (hopefully less!) - Good budget

My shoes and accessories: £200 - Good budget

Bridesmaid's dress and shoes: £120 - More than do-able

Suit for OH: £250 (just a normal suit, not a 'wedding' suit - his best man already has a really good suit in the same colour) - We got 4 suits, shirts and ties for £760, which all the boys kept for work (some good offers combined with discount codes!)

Band: £700 (actual quote - think this is quite good, they are a swing band playing for 2 hours) -

DJ: £200 or free (iPod and speakers possibly?)

Car: free (getting a friend to drive us) Very MSE!

Cake: free (my very talented friend is making it) Very MSE!

Church/organist: £200

Singers in church: free (two female relatives of mine) Very MSE!

Gifts for bridesmaid, best man and mothers: £100

Decorating the venue: £120

Flowers: £300 - Again, depending on where you are, people may have recommendations. Our ceremony and table centre pieces were part of our package with the venue, but I got my bouquet (roses, lizzies and freesias), 2x bridesmaid bouquets (smaller versions of mine), 5 buttonholes (roses) and 5 corsages (also roses) for £180. So you're budget may not be as unrealistic as you think!

I know the flowers budget is probably ridiculously low but we are being optimistic! We need 2 bouquets and about 4 buttonholes - the rest we are going to decide on depending on cost. We may use dried lavender and gyp, or garden flowers for the tables. For the church, we might do the same, with gauze ribbons on the pews.

For those who are doing favours for us, we will buy them gifts to say thank you, so that will add about £200 to the budget.

Total so far = £9,890 but I know that this is probably optimistic.

Any comments??? Have I missed something? Where can we save money? xx

We did our wedding for a little under £9k. Right at the start we wrote a list of things that were important to us, and that we weren't prepared to compromise on, things I/We wanted (and prioritised them), things we were prepared to forgo, and things we really didn't want! Each list is personal to the couple, so the videographer thing is just a suggestion. Have a think about what's important to you as a couple and take it from there.

Good Luck!

aarchk

My first reaction is that your church costs are a bit low. I think the standard CofE charge is £320 plus the extras added on by the local parish. Some regulalr church goers have been lucky enough to pay less or nothing - it depends on the church community and local rev.
I had a church wedding with organist and it cost £640 plus £35 for banns certificate from our local church... we also paid £150 for bells. It will vary from church to church and across the differing types of church, but its best to get this clear from the outset.

My wedding ended up being country vintage in style with homemade bunting (100m cost us about £40 and a few hours time), jam jars decorated with lace and ribbon for tealights and simple flowers (some from grass verges and gardens!) in cheap glass vases for centrepieces. We borrowed loads of fairylights and had Ipod playing during meal and drinks reception and during break for band in the evening. We had a 5 piece barn dance band and they cost £450 and played for 3 hours with a 30 min break.

My invites cost 41p each made by us. The OOS were a little bit more. Easy when you know how to work MS Publisher so worth having a go!

Ebay will become your friend and I recommend signing up for Quidco and topcashback. I regret not doing this! Also keep an eye out for discounts on suits and BM dress. Sign up to as many newsletters as possible (BHS weddings is good as they email you to let you know sales are on). Also Ikea/Wilkinson and Dunelm are great for decorative bits n bobs.

Nyankochan_2

Hi, and congrats!

I set a budget of £7000 for my wedding, which will cover about 45 day guests and 80 evening guests. We could have done this cheaper in a hotel or whatever but we wanted a really lovely venue, and we got one - a huge, historic Victorian house, which we have the sole use of for the day. They did a special Winter package for 40 guests for £1800, so look for Winter specials if you don't fancy a weekday wedding.

Suits - I question paying £100 to hire a normal suit, if you time it right you could buy a really nice one from the M&S sales for that price or only a little more and your hubby could get years of use out of it afterwards. Just my opinion.

Flowers - yeah, shop around. I am getting two bouquets, 6 buttonholes, 2 corsages for the Mums and a wide display for the registrar's table for £150 from our (excellent) local florist. See if your local council offers a floristry service, ours does and they're very competatively priced.

Shoes and accessories - eBay. You should be able to get a tiara, jewellery and wedding shoes for under £50 if you keep a close eye on listings. I got a fab pair of new wedding boots for £15 (RRP £60).

Photographer - spend a lot of time on internet research. You'll find many who are above and many who are within your budget. The trick is to find one within your budget WHOSE PHOTOS YOU LIKE. That's the important bit. We spent more than we planned, but we figured we'd rather spend £1000 on someone whose work we loved, than £650 on someone whose work we were a bit "Meh" about.

Don't forget to budget for hair and makeup as well.

If I had to summarize my wedding shopping so far it probably would be "eBay, eBay, eBay";)

neneromanova

wanchai wrote: »

OK, so here is our budget:

Reception for 100 guests: £5,000 (o.m.g.) Ouch! That's quite a lot! Mine's £2k for 50 day, 80 night, honeymoon suit, DJ and drinks with dinner.

Photographer: £1,500 (not very MSE at all, but I really want the best possible photos)

Videographer: £300

Wedding dress: £700 (hopefully less!) £89 for mine from Ebay

My shoes and accessories: £200 £20 from Ebay

Bridesmaid's dress and shoes: £120 Luckily my MOH said she'd buy her dress, bless her

Suit for OH: £250 (just a normal suit, not a 'wedding' suit - his best man already has a really good suit in the same colour) £350 for his, wants one he can wear over and over which is fair enough. funily enough more than my whole outfit :rotfl:

Band: £700 (actual quote - think this is quite good, they are a swing band playing for 2 hours)

DJ: £200 or free (iPod and speakers possibly?) Free DJ with reception

Car: free (getting a friend to drive us) Going in dad's car, luckily a Porsche

Cake: free (my very talented friend is making it) About £50 but that for ingredients as I'm making my own

Church/organist: £200

Singers in church: free (two female relatives of mine)

Gifts for bridesmaid, best man and mothers: £100

Decorating the venue: £120

Flowers: £300 £100 from Ebay. Going for fake as I can keep it forever

That's roughly what Mine is. Just remember...Ebay is your best friend

Where are you so people can show you places you might like at good prices

wanchai_2

Hi

Thanks a mill for the replies so far will try to address each point!

We totally forgot invitations, seating plan, menus, thank you cards etc! Our (possible - not yet booked) venue includes seating plan and menus but we want to do our own (and make them quirky) so will try to negotiate a discount on that. We would be looking at £40 or so for postage, so maybe £60 on the actual stationery - we will choose a pretty vintage style image and get it printed onto nice paper. Is £60 optimistic??

The wedding is in Northern Ireland. We would *love* a buffet or hog roast, or a vintage tea party-style wedding, but people here tend to prefer the sit-down meal. We would also happily have a midweek wedding - I am superstitious and Wednesday is considered the best day to get married. But we would probably be in the church on our own if we did that! :rotfl: People over here are a little traditional i.e. inflexible!

I know the reception seems v. expensive! We are having c.100 guests all day, no evening guests. The menu we have chosen includes tea/coffee/shortbread on arrival, a choice of main course, tea/coffee/sandwiches/canapes at midnight, and purchase and corkage for 70 bottle of wine. This costs £46 per head for around 100 guests. The venue is throwing in (this is copied from the brochure):

Red Carpet arrival for all guests

• Complimentary Champagne Reception for the Bride & Groom on arrival
• Exclusive use of our Private Landscape Gardens & Grounds available for
your wedding Photography
• Guarantee of only “One Wedding Per Day”
• Dedicated Wedding Co-ordinator to Help Tailor All Your Arrangements
• Silver Service
• Our Medieval Style Banqueting Hall, with White Linen Tablecloths & Napkins including complimentary fresh floral display at entrance
• Antique Silver Cake Stand & Knife
• Illustrated Table Plan for your guests
• Personalised Headed Menu Cards on each table
• Complimentary Orange Juice & Local Spring Water provided on all tables, which will be re-filled when required
• Late Bar Facility to 1am
• Toastmaster
• Complimentary Overnight Stay for the Bride & Groom in our Luxurious Four Poster Bridal Suite with Full Irish Breakfast the next morning
• For the convenience of the Bridal Party, changing room facilities can be provided, subject to prior arrangement and availability

• Discounted Accommodation Rates for your Wedding Guests

How does all that sound? No chair covers, but the room is sooo beautiful that if the chairs match we're not bothering with them! I hate that venues deliberately have such crappy chairs that you actually *need* chair covers. :mad:

So we don't need the table plan or menus, and they may be open to negotiation on the price of the menu. The basic menu (nothing on arrival for guests, soup and turkey/ham for main - no choice, plus dessert, no midnight food) costs about £28 without wine, but we would feel a bit stingy doing such a 'basic' menu and everyone complains about turkey and ham!! :rotfl: We do want to save money, but we also want to give our guests a great day out. I think we're going to have to cut corners without sacrificing guests' enjoyment. What can we do??

We will defo not be borrowing to fund it, we have savings! I would never borrow for a wedding! :eek:

We *really* want a wedding DVD. My dad passed away a few years ago and I bitterly regret that we don't have a video of him at all. I want the DVD to remember it all in years to come, especially 'absent friends'. Sorry if that sounds a bit daft. Maybe we will get a guest to do it in lieu of a gift to us, but they might feel resentful about being 'on duty' all day!

Re photographers, we have a few in mind and they are not cheap!!! One starts at £1,600! Another is £800 without an album - their shots are good but I'm not 100% convinced about them. Our favourites so far work out at £1,500, and I am actually considering paying an English photographer to come over, their stuff is so amazing!!! A good photographer will make pretty much any dress/venue look fabulous. If anyone has *any* photographer or videographer recommendations, I would absolutely love to hear them!

The swing band is amazing and actually very cheap for a wedding band! Even rubbish bands round here charge £1,000+! :eek: There are 6 of them and they have to travel 50 miles, so £700 is relatively good value. Again, hopefully everyone will love them. We could have just a DJ, but this will be more memorable.

So far, so not MSE! But we are willing to save money on *everything* else.

Favours - not bothering! I know that it's only a small saving but they are such a waste. We *may* have a sweetie table or a jar of love hearts on each table.

My dress - I am happy to buy 2nd hand, I've seen a dress that I love online - £2,000 new, £600 on eBay! :T I will be scouring the local vintage/preloved bridal shops too. I actually bought a brand new dress from Monsoon on eBay t'other day for £100 and if it looks the part I'll wear it!!! If not I can always sell it on. Here it is:



OH's suit - we'll buy him a suit, as it's a false economy to hire one. That way, he'll have it forever and wear it to work. And no need to buy the best man a suit!

My veil, possible headpiece, earrings, shoes etc - I have no idea how much they will cost lol! For the shoes, I don't really care what they look like, but they will need to be very comfortable and not *too* high!!!

My lovely BM says that will wear anything I put her in (bless her :A) and she is slim and gorgeous so will be easy to dress! I will keep an eye out for a dress for her on eBay and in the sales. A Monsoon dress or similar would be great. Her shoes - ditto.

The (Catholic) church doesn't charge - we will paying around £100 as a donation, and then the organist as well.

OK, maybe £200 for the thank you gifts is too much, but we are saving a FORTUNE on the cake, car and church singers, so I would want to get them something. Probably not flowers unless we can give them a few days before the wedding - maybe aftershave for the guy who's driving us, and a piece of costume jewellery or a nice scarf for the females.

I think I will defo do my own table decs - will get crafty and make stuff, I have already started saving jam jars!!! I love dried lavender and gypsophila, this would make a lovely table setting in a jam jar with twine or lace tied around it, maybe with some tea lights in pretty vintage holders? I would just buy them and then sell them on. I also adore china cups made into candles!!!

Oh gosh, forgot the rings!!! OH doesn't want to wear a ring, so we're going to get him a cheap silver band for the day (about £10), and I don't know how much mine will cost. It'll be platinum (same as my engagement ring) and slim, so probably about £300 or so?

Honeymoon also - oh Lord, that'll probably be quite expensive...