I wanna cheap and interesting hobby

Lady_Pink

Thanks for all your replies. I think the main thing I need to "get over" is my shyness. I'm great with people I know well, and am good at chatting with people I know a little, but I'm rubbish at doing the breaking the ice thing and making small talk - I always feel like a complete eejit and can never think what to talk about. This, coupled with a lack of time and money, makes it so difficult to push myself to join in with things. I was thinking about joining my local Spice group - does anyone have any experience of this? Major problem with that again though is the cost :eek:

beer2006

Hi Lady Pink

I agree with suzzi, not possible for someone with Lady Pink for a name to be dull.

I was very interested by what Tondella said about the personality traits, I need time alone as well to read and to just chill I suppose. I've tried to be an extrovert and its hard work
Naturally I'm an introvert and I like the idea of it not being worse than an extrovert, I have always thought it was.

I've had more help from MSE than anywhere else in life, make some friends here to start with, you might find someone close to you that is interested in Jewellery making, or try another forum.
Having fun doesn't always cost money, nor does doing something interesting. I always think I'm doing a bit better than someone who has to actually go on a course to learn something, when I just learn to do it with a new or old friend, or friends.

Alisonpennypincher

Do think about volunteering, i help in a local shop for 2 hours a week, and some weeks i dont go at all due to DS etc.

But i have met some lovely people, and as it is work for a large charity they have social evening's like quiz nights etc that i go to as well.

I know how you feel, i am quite shy with new people, have zilch confidence in myself and that makes things hard, dont put any pressure on yourself, you sound like a lovely person to me!

Lady_Pink

Thanks to all who replied. Had a good old chat about things with my husband yesterday and talked about the things that I would like to do. We were trying to weigh up the costs involved against the benefits gained. For example, if we joined SPICE, we'd have to pay the monthly fee, then pay for the activities. However, they run loads of things I'd like to do, and in an atmosphere where I wouldn't feel intimidated. So I would get out and do things more often, especially slightly unusual things (pole dancing and cross bow shooting anyone?) and end up feeling better about myself. But...

What price can you put on self esteem and life experience? Should I put all available resources into paying off debts, or is it worth being in debt longer, but enjoying life? I might be happier for doing these things, and getting out and meeting people and feeling more fulfilled, but I'll also have the money worries and the feeling that I shouldn't be having fun cos I can't afford it! we're coping at the moment, but I want to get rid of the debt so we don't have to "cope" - we also want to start a family eventually, and would prefer to do so being a bit more financially secure. I know a few people have suggested volunteering but I tried that a while back and it was OK, but not the kind of thing I want to do now. I don't want to be on my death bed and regret all the things I'd wanted to do, but for some reason didn't! I want some excitement in my life!

I'd greatly appreciate your views on this - what kind of balance do you think there should be between getting debt free and getting out there and making the most of life?

Whats_my_age_again

This is just my opinion here and I probably do not have the same money concerns as you but I think you should go for it.

It is difficult when you cannot attach monetary values to things but in your position I would go for it. Life is too short.

Lady_Pink

Thanks for that - it feels like everything i have should be diverted into paying debts off, especially when you read some of the posts on here about how quickly people are getting rid of their debts by saving every penny. But like you say, life's short.

tigerlily

I have the same kind of problems, I would say a reasonable outlay is more than worth it in the long run. I wish you all the best. xx

beer2006

All lifes a balance, yes you should enjoy yourself and yes you shouldn't spend more than you can afford.
Depends how desperate your debts are and how worrying they are to you I suppose.

I'm just about to start collecting and chopping branches up. Costs nothing, in fact saves money and I enjoy it more than going out to a fancy restaurant Getting fresh air etc. Not everyone is like me though

lazy_daisy

Well done for posting - I know just how you feel, sometimes it seems everyone is having fun except you but I don't really think it's true. I don't know if you have kids but even if not your life is pretty full if you work and are married with a home to look after. You may even find that it only takes one thing extra for your life to feel full and interesting, it's just a question of finding which thing!
I used to feel the same so decided to learn a musical instrument that I have always wanted to be able to play. It's not cheap so I only have one lesson a month and this month have had to give it a miss because I can't afford it (boo), and also don't always have time to practice as much as I'd like but I absolutely love it and now never feel at a loose end.
Try not to worry about being shy, that isn't really part of your personality as such, the real you is the one that can be herself with her close friends and family, the shyness is just an annoying obstacle to being able to be like this with others. It is far commoner than you think and most people who look confident are in fact just able to hide it better than you (and I!) can. I find even the most banal conversation can act as an icebreaker (the weather/the traffic/price of bus fares......yawn) because all people really need is an excuse to talk to you, proper conversations will come later when you have found things in common.
Also (nearly finished- bear with me..) I have always felt that your life needs to be "balanced" - just my theory - so maybe depending on your job, there is a side to you that isn't being used - artistic, or creative, or musical, or practical, or sporty, or literary, only you know, but when this side is developed you will feel more complete.
Anyway enough waffle from me, I haven't talked this much in years (too shy!) my mouth is dry and I need a cup of tea!
Lazy xxx

Lady_Pink

beer2006 wrote:

I'm just about to start collecting and chopping branches up. Costs nothing, in fact saves money and I enjoy it more than going out to a fancy restaurant Getting fresh air etc. Not everyone is like me though

Oh, you make me chuckle! That sounds like rather good fun, I may come and join you! Sadly, I have neither axe nor branches to chop! I did once kick a wardrobe to pieces, which I must say was rather cathartic.

Thanks also to Lazy_Daisy - you made a really interesting point about balance. The job I do is very much a "helping people" career - but one that leaves me in a room on my own for much of the day (hence being able to sneak posts on here!). I also deal with teenagers and it can be quite a thankless task, so I feel that I want to do something sociable, selfish, and to feel more validated and worthwhile. I have to say though, you are one of the few people who has suggested that a home and marriage and job (no kids) is full and interesting in itself. These days it seems like that isn't enough, there should be more.

If only I were rich, I could have so much fun!