Lent Money To A Friend & Hubby But Now They Have Split

JWF

We lent a friend and her husband of ours a couple of grand a few years ago to help them out.
After all this time nothing has been paid. I asked again a couple of years ago if they could start paying it off. They were still broke but the friend said she would start but nothing.

Just after this her and her husband split up and she is now with someone else and has another child. Her ex is still is unemployed.

The thing that gets me is that she has not been in touch since but I see her spending money on numerous prams, going to theme parks and concerts and here we are struggling.

The loan was for both of them so am I cheeky to ask her to see if she can start paying some of the money off? We really could do with it back now. I know I will never get anything off her husband as he is quite happy to stay unemployed

Tixy

I'd say she is cheeky not to have started paying it off already not you for asking her again.

However - have you got any form of written agreement from either of them to you? anything on paper at all to prove that you lent them the money and it was intended by all to be a loan?

JWF

Thanks for the reply. No I stupidly didn't put anything in writing at the time. I was just helping a mate in need out.
I was just hoping to appeal to her *good nature * in asking again.

Tixy wrote: »

I'd say she is cheeky not to have started paying it off already not you for asking her again.

However - have you got any form of written agreement from either of them to you? anything on paper at all to prove that you lent them the money and it was intended by all to be a loan?

tanith

If she hasn't managed to start paying the loan back thus far then honestly I don't think its going to happen..I don't think you are cheeky to ask but I do think its a lost cause and at some point you might have to accept its never coming back.... its a hard lesson to learn

JWF

Thanks for that. Well I have emailed her and you're probably right in that it will be falling on deaf ears but I will see what she comes back with.

tanith wrote: »

If she hasn't managed to start paying the loan back thus far then honestly I don't think its going to happen..I don't think you are cheeky to ask but I do think its a lost cause and at some point you might have to accept its never coming back.... its a hard lesson to learn

gillypkk

have you proof of transferring the money from your account into her and her ex-husbands account? this might help should you need to take this further to court.

i would do everything in writing from now on. send her a letter saying she now needs to start paying the loan back and send it to her ex aswell coz it was a joint loan and see what happens.

i dont think you will get it all back but even a few hundred would be something. good luck!

fozmcfc

Join many of us on the sticky thread on the top of the forums

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/76953

It is highly unlikely you will see the money again so, it will largerly depend on how good a friend they are.

If losing their friendship doesn't bother you, then you could go along the lines of you've let me down, I don't want any further contact with you. It might provoke some sort of payment.

or

Let them know you're disappointed but then just let it go, learn from it as many of us have had too in the past.

There is more to life than money, so sometimes we just have to move on and accept we made a mistake.