Stuck and don't know what to do

foreversummer

The trouble is there is an element in this society who are so low they have no respect for other folk. You can't reason with these sort of people. You can try to be friendly with them, you can try to be tough but reasonable, you can even scream and shout and weep but still it continues. No-one wants to help you. The council is not interested if it is not a council property and the police are not interested unless there is violence involved. And then these sort of people often tell lies and you have to defend yourself when all you want is quiet enjoyment of your home.

And of course it is made worse by the extremely poor soundproofing in properties old and new, purpose built and converted, flat, terrace or semi. Properties get smaller and people have to live close together. Soundproofing regulations should be much stricter. I remember a TV programme several years ago that said that buildings regs on soundproofing in this country leave a lot to be desired. And still they knock up hutches with cardboard-thin walls.

None of this helps the OP sadly but it is a huge problem.

Foreversummer

mortgage_hell

You're so right - you've described the entire situation to a T with every detail being correct. We tried the talk nicely, we tried the talk sternly, we tried the yell through the floor and then we've broken down and banged outside. Nothing helps, nothing works. And now the police see her as being a helpless female who is scared. If she was so scared, then why CONTINUE to smash your front door at midnight?!
We're hopefully launching a counter-harrassment thing against her - I am in the meantime going to hurry up and get that flat ready to sell, even at a loss - I need out and NO-ONE will help me!

kittieviolet

Hi
Also had nightmare neighbours in the past and realise how much it can affect your life. Do you have any other neighbours around you that it affects? A case is often stronger if there is more than one complainant involved. In the end my neighbours were evicted but by that point I didn't feel safe in the house so I sold anyway.
Hope that this gets resolved for you, I remember how stressful it can be.

mortgage_hell

Alas she doesnt effect the other neighbours as she's only above us, all of our neighbours like us though so at least we've got a good reputation to back us up. Either way we have to go, this place is full of bad memories now.

The_Palmist

I have shared a house with some students [who would sleep all day and party all night]. Being in a 9 to 5 job made things worse as I needed my sleep but at least I had a way out as I was renting.
I feel for you and I can see you have tried almost everything you could. There are a few things I can suggest:

1. you need to stop thinking about leaving, the more you want to leave the harder it will be for you to live.
2. find weaknesses for this neighbour i.e. what time they sleep etc. and use it to your advantage. Bang the door when she is sleeping, play loud music etc.
3. be super nice on her face and don't let your anguish show, you dont want to give her the satisfaction that whatever she is doing is working.

huangdi

know how you feel OP. been in a similar situation myself, tearing my hair out. i never brought friends/family around to my apartment for a long time as i was ashamed!
luckily the noise has calmed down in the last year. my best investment was muffles wax earplugs from Boots - quite simply a lifesaver and cannot hear anything with them in! can you try to use earplugs a bit more in the meantime? i found it better to wear the earplugs all the time actually and my stress levels went down. keep your chin up

mortgage_hell

I wear the silcone ear plugs now and yes, they do cut out loads of noise, but that means, no conversation at home, no tv etc. And as the BF says, it's no way to live.
I hope we get out of this situation soon, and I will then live in no less that a bungalow or seperate dwelling. Shed perhaps? haha

The_Rizler

Hi MH,
Sorry to hear your dilemma. Can I ask if you've check what your lease agreement says? Mine states that the floor covering must be carpeted which muffles the noise more than the modern woodflooring, could that be an avenue you may persue? That way you use that and get further advice.

Just a suggestion but I hope it gets better for you. I had the same issue as my flat was the ground floor and the four students above me were noisy, I was more lucky in that they were renting and so I spoke to the landlord who helped in my case.

Crossed fingers that you get resolution on this, it can be a real nightmare.

huangdi

mortgage_hell wrote: »

I wear the silcone ear plugs now and yes, they do cut out loads of noise, but that means, no conversation at home, no tv etc. And as the BF says, it's no way to live.
I hope we get out of this situation soon, and I will then live in no less that a bungalow or seperate dwelling. Shed perhaps? haha

i know, my wife says the same thing about living with them in my ear. turn the tv up then if you cant hear it with them in . that will annoy the neighbour back!:rotfl:

i will never live in a flat again...

mortgage_hell

Me too - I wouldn't even CONSIDER living in a flat again. Been looking forlorny at houses in the middle of nowhere from the side of the road - how I wished I lived on a farm!