Father's Day

Person_one

Maybe son's wife would like to enjoy father's day with her own dad who is still here without having to worry about her mother in law for one day!

Ginger_Poodle

LegalBlonde wrote: »

On Father's Day??? When you are a mum? Apart from remembering to buy my dad a card, the day means absolutely nothing to me, I am a female, not a father and it wouldn't matter if I spent the whole day alone even if every other family in the country was together. It's not Christmas!!!

Personally speaking, I always tried to think of my mum on Fathers Day after my dad died. To each their own though...

Person_one

LegalBlonde wrote: »

On Father's Day??? When you are a mum? Apart from remembering to buy my dad a card, the day means absolutely nothing to me, I am a female, not a father and it wouldn't matter if I spent the whole day alone even if every other family in the country was together. It's not Christmas!!!

Agreed, since when was father's day anything approaching a big deal? You send a card, a phone call, touch base, its not a public holiday or an important religious thing.

emmaanddave

OP, please don't take offence at the non invitation. Quite often we make arrangements with the in-laws and not the other set of parents. It is normal for this to happen and healthy. I can't see why you have got upset over this and just let your son and his family share time together. Do you always meet all together? What usually happens on Father's day?

melancholly

well in a lot of families, it's not necessarily standard to bring both sets of in-laws together... maybe at Christmas or Easter (if religious), but not for Father's Day. i don't think there's anything in this at all. he made plans and this isn't an event to stage a big family get together across large distances. next time, book him in earlier for lunch! he had a prior commitment. don't make any sort of fuss or you risk making him take sides between you and his in-laws. not worth the hassle over something this trivial.

(and for the posts above saying that father's and mother's day are just cynical, mothering sunday was a day during lent when it was traditional to visit your 'mother' church, the main church in the area. it may have morphed into something more commercial, but it is part of the Christian calendar which is why we don't share the date with mother's day in the US. that may not be relevant to a lot of families these days, since church-going is hardly the norm, and father's day certainly came over from the US about 100 years ago, but the origins of mothering sunday are certainly religious!)

POPPYOSCAR

iamana1ias wrote: »

Well then perhaps she shouldn't try and invite herself around!

I don't think there is anything wrong in asking to go to lunch as long as you are prepared to be turned down, in fact I prefer to be asked as I know they really want to come then. I also like to know if they are coming at lunch time so I can prepare enough to feed everyone.

LegalBlonde

Thanks GingerPoodle, I agree, but then we don't know the OP situation and she has said she isn't going to go into it so who knows.

McKneff

LegalBlonde wrote: »

On Father's Day??? When you are a mum? Apart from remembering to buy my dad a card, the day means absolutely nothing to me, I am a female, not a father and it wouldn't matter if I spent the whole day alone even if every other family in the country was together. It's not Christmas!!!

But, do you have children, or grown up children, it doesnt sound so,
sorry, you cant say that till it happens to you. You'll feel different when one of your grown up children hurt you,obviously without meaning to but.....time will tell.

LegalBlonde

I don't have children no, I am a grown up child, so more similar to the son's shoes than the OP's, so to try to help out the OP I was giving my opinion from a place nearer her son than herself, then made the further comment on my general opinion of father's day and such holidays. It really wouldn't hurt me if I was in that situation I know myself well enough to say that.

Person_one

McKneff wrote: »

But, do you have children, or grown up children, it doesnt sound so,
sorry, you cant say that till it happens to you. You'll feel different when one of your grown up children hurt you,obviously without meaning to but.....time will tell.

Ah, the old 'your opinion doesn't count because you've kept your gametes to yourself' argument.

Not everybody loses the capacity for rational thought because they reproduce!