old style adoption?

mennie

firstly please excuse my grammar as i am on my phone. We are applying to adopt and have our first social worker visit in 2 weeks. We will really struggle financially when i go onto adoption pay so we are trying to prepare as best we can now. We have set up two pavingss accounts one for things we will need when placed and one to supplement the adoption pay but we only have £320 saved i would like £2500 by this time next year. I am looking for tips to squeeze each penny til it squeaks and how to start off family life the oldstyle way. Thanks x

dandy-candy

Hi Mennie
How lovely that you are planning on giving a home to a child! I would advise you to have a good look at areas you can make savings on like food bills and utilities, then spend as much time as you can reading through the relevant posts on here. Post any cries for help on particularly difficult areas for you - everyone responds so kindly and quickly!
Children are an extra strain on your purse (I have 3) but are so worth it, they are wonderful! Clothing needn't be pricey as you can buy cheap (Primark) or even secondhand, but I would always go for good new shoes. Bucket loads of love is what they really need and that is free Good luck with your social workers visit x

M0neysav3r

Hi Mennie

Congratulations on taking the first step of adding to your family :j

It is great that you're preparing for things financially already, remember that you may be entitled to an adoption allowance though it is means tested so if you do have £k's in the bank you are unlikely to receive any additional funds from social services.

In my opinion children cost you whatever you allow them to, if you dress your child in designer clothing and have days out everyday then yes they cost a fortune, we're very fortunate that our son inherits alot of clothing from friends and family, but we also buy some things from charity shops, bootsales etc aswell as buying new things from cheaper stores. Shoes we do buy new but again he has been known to wear hand-me-downs for out in the garden etc, his wellies are second hand. For days out we tend to do free things like the park, woods, library, go for a picnic, walk by the canal and save places like softplay for a treat, we have really noticed the difference this brings, friends children are regular visitors to softplay and are therefore bored easily when we go together, our son on the other hand is appreciative of going and has a really good time.

My advice for you would be to really try to manange without your wage, we didn't think this would be possible but we have done it and I am very proud that I have not returned to work, my son needs my time and love much more than my money, it took alot for us to cut costs on things but once you're used to cutting down you get used to it.

Have a think of where you spend all of your money, utilities, food, car costs, holidays etc and work out what can be tweaked if not scrapped.

Best of luck with your visit

x

Hadley

Best not to say to the sw things like I just want to give a child a good home etc if it is your first visit they don't like you saying that.Hope all goes well.

hedgewytch13

I agree with the second hand clothes, what I do is buy bundles of clothes from ebay, I've managed to get good condition, good quality Monsoon, Next, Baby Gap clothes for sometimes 99p for a bundle. What I do is when my little one grows out of some I sell them on there and keep the money in paypal as his clothes fund for when I see a good bundle in his size. I've found people pay so much for say a Monsoon outfit for a special occasion that you buy them cheap and they may have only been worn once, I just give myself a limit on what to spend.
For family days out in my area they send out a booklet of cheap and free activiites for the holidays but you also get it from the library. I then make a timetable of what we want to do and then try to book onto them. Tourist information often have booklets with vouchers in for money off days out, a good one one year was one free child with a paying adult at the local cinema. My local museum often does free craft activities during the holidays, as does the library. Also depending on the age of the child, there are often free surestart activities at the centres. Also there's Bookstart packs you can get from some libraries....I think there's a free bag of books at 4-6 months, 18 months and at 3 years. I don't give my 7 year old pocket money but I do let him earn money in exchange for chores. Because he's a little !!!!!! we have a reward system, where good behaviour earns points and if he has enough points he can earn a treat.
I do menu plan and can feed a family of 2 adults, and one 7 year old on a budget of £50 a week, that includes formula for my baby as well as toiletries and some weeks nappies.

espresso21

Good luck. I would love to adopt but with the hours I work it wouldn't be fair to a child...and if I didn't work those hours, I wouldn't be able to support a child. But I think it's a wonderful thing to do and if I could do it, I would. Best of luck to you.

zippychick

I hope it all works out for you , i really do.

Trying to think what threads would be useful - if any other BGs (or anyone else) thinks of any more, please add them!!!!

How to organise everything in my life OS

tips and quick qs on how to start being OS

There are a food few meal planning threads - starting with meal planning how do you do it, and meal planning where do i start?

We also have the grocery challenge - it's never to late to join and you will get support and help from the other members. Read the first few posts to get an understanding of that one.:)

Basically don't overwhelm yourself by doing too much at once - take it in baby steps.

Good luck with your OS journey. Do search for threads on here as nine times out of ten, someone has asked the question before you:p

Good luck and we will merge this later on

Zip

uropachild

Huzzah for beginning your adoption journey! My SIL & DH are just starting out too and have so far completed the month long weekly course that you begin with. They have also just done their application form this week.

I agree with taking baby steps. The single biggest hurdle for us was getting our grocery shopping costs down. We used to spend an absolute fortune at Tesco etc., but now i meal plan and cook meals from scratch and double cook to freeze portions too. That has helped a lot with costs in general.

As for child specific... I would imagine that you will receive gifts from family and friends in the same way as you might with a biological addition to the family (i certainly intend to buy for my new neice(s) or nephew(s)). Obviously it depends on your family, but you may be lucky enough to get some of the larger items from them.

Tere's not really much planning you can do to put clothing and things aside i guess, as you won't be sure what the age of your son/daughter(s) will be. If you have disipline you could start a savings fund for them. Perhaps join some parenting communities and ask about the kinds of things needed for the age range of child you are looking at adopting? Then you could at least compile a list of things you might need along with estimated costs per item. By asking advice on what to put on your list from friends and family too it will make it clear that you're after things and might nudge them along to help you out. (i know, cheeky but i would!)

Look out on freecycle for things like cots and prams etc. Charity shops are great for clothes once you know what age etc. you want.

For inspiration on playtime activities there are tons of blogs that focus on low cost old style fun. The Imagination Tree is one i like: http://www.theimaginationtree.com/. You should be able to hop onto others from there.

Best of luck to you!

hcb42

shame that badge doesn't reflect two ways..

mennie

How dreadful, some child will be taken out of the care system and placed with a family that will love them unconditionally.

I was brought up with some second hand clothes, mushrooms growing on my carpet and ice on the inside of my windows in the winter and I am a well adjusted, open minded, well mannered, kind caring individual

So I dont have any concerns there, but thanks for your valuable input.:p

Thanks to all the others for your help, I will reply when I have calmed down a bit:rotfl:

Uniscots97

mennie wrote: »

How dreadful, some child will be taken out of the care system and placed with a family that will love them unconditionally.

I was brought up with some second hand clothes, mushrooms growing on my carpet and ice on the inside of my windows in the winter and I am a well adjusted, open minded, well mannered, kind caring individual

So I dont have any concerns there, but thanks for your valuable input.:p

Thanks to all the others for your help, I will reply when I have calmed down a bit:rotfl:

ignore it.