When and how to give in my notice

Seaxwyn

Hello there

I have to give in my notice and I'm dreading it. I thought writing it down might help clarify things for me and even better, I might get some helpful advice.

I started a job 6 months ago. Before this I was self-employed for many years. Taking the job was a kind of wobble, I wanted a break after a stressful period, but now I realise it was a mistake and want to go back to self-employment, where I can earn at least double what I'm earning now, and enjoy it more.

I've already lined up some contracts for next year so I do need to give up this job asap but I keep chickening out as I know my boss (who reacts badly to stress) will be really annoyed. Understandably - she did ask when offering me the job if I was sure I wanted it. So I have wasted her time and worse, there is now a recruitment freeze so I will probably not be replaced, leaving her with a management headache.

I know I've behaved badly but I need to bite the bullet and I'm agonising over whether to give in my notice:

a) tomorrow - just get it over with.
b) at/just before our christmas lunch this week - giving the opportunity to explain my reasons in front of colleagues, which might help the boss see it in a more positive light,
c) just before Christmas break, so she has time over the break to get used to the idea, or
d) first day back in the new year, which is when we launch a project we have been working on. Her stress levels will be lower once this is accomplished, so that is probably the most considerate option, but also ties me in to staying there for the whole of January.

Also - do I do it verbally or in writing?

Apologies for going on at such length but if anyone has any advice I'd be so grateful.

Seawxyn

Tustastic

Hi Seaxwyn, one or two things occur to me in considering your post.
Six months is a very short time to give to a job, unless you have had an extraordinarily bad time of things. Might this have a negative impact on your reputation and ability to get work in your particular area/industry?
Verbal or written notice - I would suggest having the letter ready but telling your boss face to face first. Do this in a one-to-one session. It is not acceptable to give your notice verbally in a group situation.
Timing - if your boss has been fair to you, be fair to her. If your decision is final now, then tell her very soon. You give the impression that it will be a difficult conversation and I agree with you. That is no reason to put it off.
Preparation - how about drafting your resignation now? Something very brief and to the point, saying something positive about the time you have spent with the company and about your boss yet explaining that the opportunities ahead of you as a freelancer are just too good to miss.
Also, put something on paper about how you intend to achieve and deliver everything promised before your last day at work. This will form a script for the difficult conversation when you hand in your notice.
What a ramble, but HTH anyway. Good luck:)

love_lifer

new year sounds like the best time to do it. ive known easily by 6m mark when a jobs not right. as long as you behave honourably, youre ok. we all get into jobs and think oh no; thats life im afraid. i could bore you with my mistakes, but best not. so deep breath and do it graciously.
by the way, doesnt sound like you have behaved badly- the job just doesnt suit you

Seaxwyn

Thanks Tutastic,

Your suggestion of drafting a script and letter is really helpful. I've had a go and will paste the result below. If you have any further thoughts I'd be really grateful. My boss has been fair, though hard to work with as incredibly stressy and critical.

I'm not worried about damaging my reputation as this job was a complete sideways step for me. I'll be returning to an industry I've worked in for 19 years (ten of them freelance). I have blown it with this particular employer but am not likely to want to go back there in the near future.

Here's my draft resignation letter:

Dear XX

I am writing to confirm that I intend to leave my position at XXX on xxdate.

I have enjoyed my time here and I appreciate having had the opportunity to work with you on XXX. I have enjoyed working at XXX, and have learned a lot.

Unfortunately, I have found it difficult to make ends meet on the salary, and have had to accept some better offers. A cold, hard look at my family finances made it clear that I have no other option.

I apologise for the inconvenience this will cause you and will do all I can over the next month to get the XXX off to a good start.

[letter ends]

Is that OK?

Tustastic

Seaxwyn wrote:

Here's my draft resignation letter:

Dear XX

I am writing to confirm that I intend to leave my position at XXX on xxdate.It's simpler to write that you are resigning as of the date on the letter. Your last day of employment then has to be worked out by HR.

I have enjoyed my time here and I appreciate having had the opportunity to work with you on XXX. I have enjoyed working at XXX, and have learned a lot during this time.

Unfortunately, I have found it difficult to make ends meet on the salary, and have had to accept some better offers. A cold, hard look at my family finances made it clear that I have no other option.This isn't what you posted on MSE regarding reason for leaving. Could look as though you are angling for a pay rise or bonus, using resignation as a threat. Why not stick to the truth e.g. 'As you know, I have a successful background in xxxx and have been offered several very challenging and rewarding assignments which I have decided to accept.

[STRIKE]I apologise for the inconvenience this will cause you and[/STRIKE] Leave this part of the script to your boss! 'I shall be working hard during my notice period to meet all my work commitments and Iwill do all I can over the next month to get the XXX off to a good start.

[letter ends]

Is that OK?

Hope this edit makes sense.:)

RenStar

Hiya,

I-Resign (http://www.i-resign.com/uk/resigning/) has some great templates for resigning.

HTH

Ren

r2d2c3p0

At the moment you hold all the cards, ie. you can choose when to resign, on what terms, and what happens next.

Once you resign you are largely at the mercy of market forces, so with that in mind I think you're wise to weigh the decision up carefully.

Personally -- if you must resign -- I'd look to do it after Christmas, at least you can enjoy Christmas safe in the knowledge you will unshackle yourself post-Christmas, and also be paid over the statuatory holidays, moreover, if there is the opportunity to work during the break, on non-stat hols, without the normal burdens why not do it.

Use the time (ie, delaying your resignation) to build some momentum to find your next role/self-employed venture. Cash/capital is important and you should want to minimise the time you are in limbo.

You are better off starting your search for the new opportunities while you are still employed -- not least of which because you will still have an income and you'll go stir crazy waiting for things to happen if you're not doing something.

Lastly you can emotionally detach yourself from your current work, and feel that you are indeed moving one, by building momentum for your future by getting out there and organising the next steps before you cut your current employer loose.

So bottom line, get out into the market now, delay your resignation until the new year.

Good luck!

Seaxwyn

Thanks for the advice everyone.

I went into work yesterday all psyched up to have the conversation and my boss was at home sick! She's not expected back today, then later this week there are Christmas dos and I wouldn't want to blight the atmosphere there by having my boss in a seroiusly bad mood (she really is a stressy person).

So I've decided to tell her next week, and agree to work til the end of January if she wishes. If they only hold me to a month all the better.

Beyond that I can't go, as I have already accepted work which will take up all my time from Feb onwards.

I discovered yesterday that I am actually required to give in my notice not to my boss but her boss - but obviously I will tell mine first, so I have to go through the whole conversation twice. But actually I'm glad as the other boss is a more rational person who (I hope) will see it just as a management problem rather than a personal betrayal!

Thanks again for the advice