Advice on husbands debts

Judicious_2

I have lurked around the boards for a while, but this is my first post. I am a single working mother to 3 kids, aged 12, 14 and 16, the youngest 2 live with me. My 12 year old has special needs but I have to work full time as well as care for him.

Compared to some people my situation isn't that bad. I earn enough to pay my debts but my problem comes from my marriage. My husband is bi-polar and up until we separated earlier this year he had been in and out of work for several years. I worked through all that time and managed to keep us afloat - just! Unfortunately to do this I had to write to everyone we owed money too and tell them the situation, reduce our payments and try to keep these up.

Now that we are separated where do I stand on these debts? I am prepared to pay the debts in my name and half towards the joint ones, but as I have been paying some of my husband's as well the companies haven't been keen on my stopping these. My ex is on long term invalidity benefit - he may never work again even though he's only 41 - and can not afford to pay anything.

I have tried to juggle the debts around to low interest credit cards or loans but because of our history I am not able to. How can I repair my credit history if these debts are still hanging around? Can I have his debts removed from the credit file for my address? Does it work like that??

Can anyone suggest how I should handle this? If I paid his as well I would not be able to live. As it is my budget after bills is just £360 for the month for all our food, travel and general expenditure.

I'm sorry for all the questions and if this seems a bit rambly, but I want to get myself out of debt and need some advice on how to start. If I can lose these debts of his I would be in a better position to pay off my own more quickly.

Look forward to hearing from you.

Emmzi

If they are in his name alone, they cannot make you pay them. End of story.

Make sure any accounts they have been paid out of have DDs stopped, and are in your name alone - they may try and claim DDs from a joimt account.

However for joint debts you will probably find you are 'joint and severally liable' - this means they can demand ALL the payment from either one of you; you are unlikely to be able to pay only half.

Judicious_2

Thanks Emmzi. I hadn't thought about the fact that I might have to pay all the joint debts. How dumb am I? Of course if I'm offering to pay they are going to want all the money not just half. Might have to rethink this.

fatbelly

Sounds to me like a case for a debt management plan (CCCS or Payplan) but if you wanted to do a full statement of affairs we could give better advice.

I agree with Emmzi's points - and would add that there's one safe way to make sure that your bank doesn't take money against debts without your permission - open a new bank account unconnected with any credit cards or loans.

Judicious_2

Bank account is safe as only pay my debts from this. Used to pay his by cheque so no direct debits.

I'm not sure I want to go down the road of a debt management plan as my current debts aren't a problem, its just these old joint ones. I don't really know how they work (CCCS etc) but would I have to declare everything I pay out and include all my debts too. Would I then have to get rid of my credit cards etc?

Emmzi

Judicious,

if you are on not bad terms with your ex, maybe you could suggest that *he* attends CAB/Payplan etc for help with his debts? It sounds like he could use it - and maybe bankruptcy would be a good option for him to 'clean his slate' and start again. It is unlikely the joint debt would be written off, but it might put his somewhat stressed mind at rest.

A DMP would enable you to negotiate with your creditors (joint included) to have interest frozen/ reduced and reduced payments, although over a longer term. But it sounds like reducing outgoings needs to be a priority.

Other things to check
- have you re-checked benefit, tax credit etc entitlement now you are a single parent?
- An option may be to sell any property and use it to clear debt, if you have equity - drastic but sometimes solves a problem

Regarding repairing credit - unlikely while you still have joint debt, you cannot be financially dissassociated while you have this link. Not good news.

Have you got a copy of your credit report to see how bad this is? Sometimes knowing the facts can help.

Also have a look at the 'first ime posters' thread. An SOA as desrcibed in that, may help us to help you make your money stretch further.

CLAPTON

just to clarify about the bank account....if you have any loans/CC either in your name or jointly with your ex and they are with the same bank as your current a/c they can 'raid' your current a/c to pay the debts...so if thats the case you must open a new bank a/c with a bank to whom you have no debts/CC and make sure all your income goes into it.

Judicious_2

Thanks Clapton I didn't know that. Luckily my salary is paid into a bank account which is mine alone. We did have a joint account but I transferred all my direct debits to my account and left his where they were. If I closed this account he wouldn't have access to one as I'm not sure he would be able to open another. I know I should close this as it still ties us together.

My family think I'm being too easy on him and that I should cut all ties and let him sort it out himself, but I can't do that. I feel responsible for some of the debt in his name as it was taken out for us both. Admittedly he shows no intention of helping me pay what was in my name but he gets really stressed when I try to talk to him about money.
If he was declared bankrupt wouldn't the companies with which we have joint debts chase me for the full payment?

I am currently working on an SOA and can see a few areas I should cut back on but will post when I have completed.

newlywed

Emmzi wrote:

A DMP would enable you to negotiate with your creditors (joint included) to have interest frozen/ reduced and reduced payments, although over a longer term. But it sounds like reducing outgoings needs to be a priority.

Is this right? OH's ex is currently working with some debt company to arrange reduced payments and only paying a token £1. Now they are chasing OH to increase his share of the joint loan payments and threatening him. He's had no work, filled in the SOA for them and made an offer and they say nope they want him to pay full amount.