Thanks to the wife............

bikerqueen

isn't it about 400 pound PER MONTH over spend, every month for 14 years? That is quite a lot...

I'm with Lynzpower on this one, she needs to decide what she weill do about it with your help, not vice versa.

Toto

well yes it is a lot but my point is the op needs to find out what it was spent on and the reasons for it before everyone judges her. I actually find it incredible that partners can keep these kind of secrets, I mean the other person must notice the level of spending, see the items being brought home? I don't control my partners spending at all, it's all 50/50 here but I have an idea of what he earns and I can see if he is spending too much by looking at what he buys. But I can't make any comment on this situation or blame anyone without knowing how the money has been spent.

benbenandme

Toto - I agree it is a huge amount of money but without meaning to sound daft there probably wasn't that many purchases to "see being brought home". As has been mentioned before, the odd extra bit of grocery shopping, christmas presents, unexpected bills eg. car repairs etc.... and of course the huge amount of interest generated over the years ... I am purely speculating so feel free to shoot me down but I woud imagine that "the wife" isn't living a WAG's lifestyle but has gradually got further and further into debt with little to show for it.

Xbigman

At first look I would strongly advise you not to secure the debt and not to take on your wifes debts at all. This kind of spending is a habit that is hard to break and if you remortgage it is very likely to come back to haunt you.
If you can support the both of you on only your income then you should get her onto a debt management plan and get her to use her entire income to pay off the debts.
Is your home in joint names? If not you should not even contemplate taking on that debt. This also keeps bankruptcy as an option later.
If it is in joint names then be prepared for some scary times ahead. With that level of debt you will certainly get some charging orders put on you property and the debt collectors will try every scare tactic you can imagine. She should get a basic bank account with another bank and move her pay there whilst awaiting the start of the DMP. Also realise that if the house/mortgage is in joint names then you are financially linked and a DMP will trash both your credit ratings. If you are not linked then you personally are unnafected. You should get you credit records and check this with some urgency.

Lastly. You might wonder how the debt was built up and where the money went. If she has been paying off one card with another for years then it went in interest. Some time ago someone (sorry I forget who) worked out how much you would owe each year if you overspent by £1 a day on a high APR card and respent the minimum payment each month. It was.

Year 1 £397
2 871
3 1438
4 2116
5 2927
6 3895
7 5054
8 6440
9 8096
10 10077
11 12445
12 15275
13 18660
14 22707
15 27546
16 33331
17 40248
18 48518
19 58406

Regards



X

james32_uk

Xbigman wrote:

Some time ago someone (sorry I forget who) worked out how much you would owe each year if you overspent by £1 a day on a high APR card and respent the minimum payment each month. It was.

Year 1 £397
2 871
3 1438
4 2116
5 2927
6 3895
7 5054
8 6440
9 8096
10 10077
11 12445
12 15275
13 18660
14 22707
15 27546
16 33331
17 40248
18 48518
19 58406

Regards



X

That is scary! :eek:

notanothergreyhair

barneybeagle wrote:

But, apart from this (yeah I know a big this) she is perfect in every other way 'that I know' and a great mother to our two young bairns.

...and it sounds like you are one of the nicest guys in the world. A situation as serious as this would have wrecked many a marriage; massive credit to you.

If only I could find a guy like you; well, one that liked guys back!

joeblack066

Amen to that, notanothergreyhair.....I'd LOVE to find a guy like BB! All my guys have taken me into debt, and tho I take full responsibilityfor allowing it to happen (too naive!) I wouldn't be in the mess I'm in if it wasn't for them! BB, you're AMAZING!! I hope that you manage to get through this, and I agree that you should pause before remortgaging. If you pay most of the bills, and your wife is going back to full time after Christmas, making her THP £1200, couldn't she take full responsibility for the debt, pay it at £1000 per month, and she'd be debt free in 5 years? She'd still have the £200 per month for herself, so wouldn'y have to 'ask' you for her spends, and she will feel great taking comtrol! The stress on her must have been incredible, and I applaud you both for having such a strong marriage. Debs :T :T :T

beanielou

When I added it up I only got it to 42, 500 odd.
What am i missing?

black-saturn

Want to just say I agree with all the above posts and if I can pay off my debt and my mortgage on £690 take home pay per month and still pay the bills I'm sure you can manage to pay off this with your wages.

barneybeagle

Thanks again for all your replies.

First of all my wife in my eyes was never a big spender. If we wanted anything for the house then we spoke about it then went ahead and I bought it or it came out of our savings. I have always strived to be debt free and expected to be mortgage free within the next seven years (history now).

I believe the debt will have run up in the way XBIGMAN describes it. Just to confirm I have always paid for everything except for -£400 that my wife used for paying some of the bills. Anything else, holidays, cars, repairs, etc etc then I paid for.

Back to my problem though. I have now decided that with what little we have from savings that we will pay off her Debenhams and Next cards, cut them up and cancel the accounts. That will leave us with one loan and four credit cards to pay off.

My wife will give me full control of her wages (her decision not mine) and I will be paying her a wage. She is going back full time after the New Year and may look at getting involved in Virgin V parties etc to raise some extra cash.

I have considered the https://www.whatsthecost.com snowballing method, but unless I'm getting it wrong, we will struggle to afford the minimum amount each month to reduce the debt so this may be a no go area unless someone tells me different.

Here is the exact details I have to hand of the current debt. This is after this months payment on the loan and the payment in full of the Debenhams and Next cards so I can concentrate on these below:

Loan (Barclays)
APR 8.9%
She has paid this for 41 months now - 43 months to run - basically another 3.5-4.0 years
Outstanding debt on loan:- Working it out after this month I think it will be £17,982.14


Barclaycard Mastercard:
APR 19.9%
Cash Annual Rate 27.9%
Outstanding balance £9,023.31
Estimated interest on next month's statement is £180.70
Available credit on card:- £376.69
No payment protection
This months payment due on:- 13 December (Minimum Payment - £225.00)


Barclaycard Gold Visa
APR 19.9%
Cash Annual Rate 27.9%
Outstanding balance £10,182.33
Estimated interest on next month's statement is £189.74
Available credit on card:- £117.67
Payment protection is £79.81
This months payment due on:- 13 December (Minimum Payment - £229.00)


Capital One
APR 19.9%
Outstanding Balance £9,606.84
Estimated interest on next month's statement is £108.43
Available credit on card £393.16
Payment Protection is £75.30
This months payment due on:- 23 December (Minimum Payment - £288.19)


Virgin Money
APR 19.9%
Outstanding Balance £9,864.60
Estimated interest on next month's statement is £126.60
Available credit on card £235.40
Payment Protection is £71.01
This months payment due on:- 15 December (Minimum Payment - £213.47)

We have enough to pay the December payments above to give us breathing space. The total debt will then be around -£57,000.

Is it possible to get the payment protection on three of the cards stopped as this would save about £220 a month which would in itself pay the minimum of one of the cards?

Would any credit card lender give me a credit card or cards on 0% over 6 months or more on £57,000 then I can get into the card tarting way of paying my debt of quicker. My wife has never been refused credit (there's a surprise) and to my knowledge we both have good credit ratings.

Is it possible as I have previously mentioned above to do snowballing. At a struggle I think we could at the current rates above be able to pay the minimum amounts off each month and if I get overtime & a bit extra money then we can pay what we can when we can as well, but it leaves no money in the pot for a rainy day, plus little or no luxuries?

I'm currently working away at the moment. I travelled offshore the day I found out about the debts so I have another 11 days to go. When I do get home I will show my wife this thread and maybe encourage her to come on here. It's always good to talk to others who have the experience of what we are suffering at this time.

Your thoughts again or more importantly solutions please (thanks in advance).

bb