Anyone got a little help & support going spare.

Issuma

Thanks to all of you for taking the time to reply and your words of advice.

Unfortunately the amount of our debt is massive over 60k and at the moment we have approx 30 - 40k equity in our property, I appreciate that some people may think it would be a good idea to sell which would enable us to pay a huge chunk of the debt off but we would never be able to get another mortgage (credit rating shot to pieces and our age would be against us) and again the whole idea of moving whether it be from our choice or not really wouldn't be a good idea, my OH got very stressed out and worked up about it when I tried to bring the subject up over the weekend and the last thing I need is him making himself ill over all this and having a relapse - fingers crossed I won't ever have to experience what happened to him ever again because next time the outcome might not be a positive one.

I know I can't wrap him in cotton wool for the rest of his life but he just can't deal with stressful situations anymore unfortunately this is one of the symptoms he's been left with following his heart attack.

I feel better for having the support of you wonderful people, I suppose all I can do now is wait and see what happens when the letters start dropping through the letter box, at least they can't hassle me on the phone - non of them have got my number !!!!!!!

Thanks again

glimmerofhope

Hi Issuma
My understanding is set up Standing orders not direct debits - that way YOU control the amount each month, if you set up Direct Debits these can be changed by your creditors

lemonpopsicle

Sorry to hear that you and OH are so stressed. From family experience heart problems/ surgery often seem to lead to depression and problems coping with stress. It might be an idea to post your SOA, the lovely peeps
on this forum might be able to give you some friendly advice about saving money, or at least be able to look at your finances impartially.:)

Issuma

Thanks lemonpopsicle

This is the side of my OH that other people don't see or understand because he appears physically ok but where the stress and depression is concerned he's a totally different person now than he was before and sometimes it's very hard to deal with.

We've cut everything back as far as we can and I've done my SOA which I've sent to all our creditors with the help of CCCS I might post it later if I can pluck up the courage !!!!

Its not that I don't want you lovely peeps to see my SOA but I'm embarrased should anyone recognise me from my story (especially from work) as I'm always telling everyone how wonderful this site is for money saving tips etc and I'm sure someone would realise it was me and I don't want my financial business being broadcast where everyone can read it !!!!!

Issuma

Just come home to my first default notice for my Halifax credit card, suppose this is something I will have to get used to they say they want payment in full before the 05th April I'm already on a payment plan with them for this account which was supposed to run until July not sure whether it's a coincidence that I've received this today after sending them a letter last week with my new SOA and lower payment offer - not had any correspondence from them before this.

We bank with the Halifax as well I have another bank account already set up do you think it's time I started moving things over to the other account incase they try to take the money from our current account -the off setting rule !!

brokeinlondon

Yes, definitely a good idea to move your account. Co-op and Barclays both do good basic accounts; I have the co-op one and can't fault their customer service, the staff are always very friendly! I have a Barclaycard so couldn't bank with them

timmmers

You're doing the very best thing. Asking advice and not hiding from it. You canonly do your best, if that's not enough I'll be surprised because these times have hurt many people financially so it's hardly a rare thing.

Think of it that way, there is no point in worrying about what you can't do, be proud to have done your best. Many people I know don't even try, and as a matter of interest they don't get much trouble either.

If you spend a while browsing here, you'll find you're not in as bad a spot as others and there is usually a way to deal with any situation suggested already.

Issuma

Once again thanks for your support, I'm going to move the money from our Halifax account today - we already have another account set up with a bank that we don't owe any money to and we're both changing our bank details with our employers so next months salaries will go into the other account and not the Halifax.

We have an overdraft on the Halifax account which we are using so once I've moved everything from there we will still be accruing charges on this account every month even though it won't be being used, what's the best way to deal with this ?? I've already asked the Halifax if I could pay the overdraft off as a seperate debt but they've said NO so that debt will continue to increase...............any advice on the best way to deal with this. Thanks

Have a good day

tealady

Hi
Have a look at the snowballer, it may help you sort out what to pay to whom and who should get the most IYSWIM. Its a way of making sure your debts get cleared in the fastest amount of time.

Issuma

Just a quick question......I've been discussing our situation with my sister (apart from OH she is the only other person who knows about it) and she has come up with an idea that MIGHT and it's a big MIGHT allow me to borrow an amount of money from a family member to be able to offer full & final settlements on our CC's if I do get this opportunity do I work out the offers on a pro rata basis using a similar calculation when offering reduced payments or is there a certain percentage of the outstanding debt that would be classed as an acceptable amount to offer ??

Whilst this is just an idea at the moment I would appreciate any advice on this so I can try and work out whether this would be feasable for us or not.

Thanks as always.