THE FUTURE IS ONE BIG CHALLENGE AFTER ANOTHER for 3Dogs and friends ..... PART 2

3Dogs

Beanie, next time you are in Sainsb, ask at the customer service desk in case you left it there - they generally have quite a pile of them

savingwannabe

A farmer named Sid was overseeing his stock in a remote moorland pasture in North Yorkshire when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the farmer, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?"

Sid looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing stock and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASApage on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany .

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the farmer and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Sid.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the back of his car.

Then Sid says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

"You're a Member of Parliament for our Government", says Sid.

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

"No guessing required." answered the farmer. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of pounds worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. ...

Now give me back my dog!

Aesop

savingwannabe wrote: »

He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email

that's what i used to do !

3Dogs

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: Kit - I like that one

Are you off to work now hun? Late back tonight

3Dogs

I'm off to do the dishes and a bit of tidying up, then 'maybe' do some eb*ying, maybe ................

vixarooni

I am sooo full!! I didn't get a voucher, but the lady forgot to charge us for the desserts so we saved £12 or so! Happy days. They put how many calories are in each dish now, its quite scary!

savingwannabe

At work now. Yuk!!!! roll on after 9pm.

Aesop

http://www.getintogardening.co.uk/getprizes/competitions/


Free seeds Terms & conditions

1. All users who register at https://www.getintogardening.co.uk or login to https://www.getintogardening.co.uk and sign up to receive free seeds between 1st March 2011 and 31st March 2011 are eligible for free seeds.
2. Users will be required to visit store to collect their free seeds.
3. Users will receive an email from Homebase – Get into Gardening informing them that the seeds are ready to collect in store.
4. Seeds will be available for a 2 week period in store.
5. Each unit contains three packs of seeds – maximum one unit per person. In the event of more than one registration being made, Homebase reserves the right to discount all registrations by that person.
6. Homebase – Get into Gardening are giving away a maximum of 50,000 seeds (50,000 sets of 3 packs of seeds). Seeds are redeemed in store on a first come, first served basis. While stocks last.
7. Email with redemption voucher is non-transferable. Can only be used by the person named in the email.
8. Entrants must be UK residents and at least 18 years of age, excluding employees of The Home Retail Group, their agents or anyone else professionally connected with the promotion.
9. No automated, third party or bulk entries permitted.
10. If events occur that render the promotion impossible due to reasons beyond Homebase's reasonable control, it may, at its discretion, vary or amend the promotion accordingly.

Probably already here on mse but haven't looked.

beanielou

3Dogs wrote: »

Beanie, next time you are in Sainsb, ask at the customer service desk in case you left it there - they generally have quite a pile of them

Am amazing pil;e indeedy & an amazing pile of bankcards too:eek:
No necter card though.

Marru

Just a quick hello!

I have come clean to my manager about my depression and she was understandable for me to have one week sick leave next week. I am so relieved. Am going in tomorrow to tidy up loose ends and then I have whole week off :j