Disgusted

mrsmather1

I regularly visit these boards for some sound advice and counsel. So it maddened me when I say some of the responses made to a genuine post.

The thread with which I refer to is fro ko1970 - see below.

I personally wouldn't send the letter - but I would certainly not jump up there on my Holier than thou horse and start judging someone.

I take it we are all adults on this board? If this is the case than perhaps we should grow up? If you haven't got anything constructive to say then perhaps you shouldn't post anything at all.

Oh wouldn't it be nice to be like some of the posters on that thread who haven't made one mistake in their lives.

ko1970 - congratulations for sorting out your life and looking after your family - glad you are making progress.

Mrsmather1

_Andy_

I can assure I've made many mistakes in my life, including financial ones. However, I don't attempt to blame anyone but myself for those mistakes, nor would I have the bare-faced cheek to write to the bank involved and ask for compensation.l

Cannon_Fodder

I think its quite valid to try to give someone a "Reality Check". Otherwise if they continue to delude themselves, they could get into further problems.

You might choose to call it "Tough love" or some other trendy slogan, to make it more palatable, but ultimately it is sometimes necessary to be "Cruel to be Kind".

The politically correct, namby pampy state attitude, i.e. at schools where there are never any losers on sports day, because competition is "unhealthy" does not prepare the young for the real world, nor does keeping on your rose tinted glasses help people in financial difficulty to get out and stay out of debt - can you guarantee if he got £20,000 compensation from the bank, that he would not be straight down the bookies?!?!?! No, of course you can't.

This was a pretty extreme example of poor debt, so its likely to create some extreme opinions..."regular" debtors getting rid of their Sky package deserve further support, but when they say "its a necessity" then its time for a Reality Check, there too.

mrcow

mrsmather1 wrote:

If you haven't got anything constructive to say then perhaps you shouldn't post anything at all.

Well if all this board were to offer was a cup of tea and sympathy, then much of the advice wouldn't be worth a tin of beans.

The posts were constructive, just perhaps not in the way the OP was hoping? As you say he made mistakes....why try and blame someone else for your mistakes? It's a cop out.

Do you think he'd still be complaining to the RBoS about their lending if he'd ended up quids in after his gambling period?

ManAtHome

Why are you not also disgusted with ko1970 who has so far refused to reveal what he told the banks under the "purpose of loan" and "current income and expenditure" headings?

jonesMUFCforever

ko1970 wrote:

thankyou mrs mather, It seems that a lot of people missd the point, I never once said I wasn't to blame and yet some of the abuse I have recieved has been quite unfair, one woman called shelley said I made her sick!! what is that about?
I have my gambling under control
I have two rather adorable young children
and I'm happy
i'm not at all bitter
a man who never makes a mistake, never does anything

i think it is a policy by this goverment and banks to borrow people money knowing full well that they won't be able to pay it all back and therefore they will have to work longer and harder and generate even more revenue in the shape of tax for the gov and interest for the banks

i why do you think mortgages are now so high?

Mortgages are lower now than at the time of the last housing boom!
Percentage wise mortgage costs are lower now than in the 1990's (measured against take home pay).
The government nor the banks have not 'persuaded' me to take out loans which I could not afford or repay and it is not in any party manifesto (although I must admit I have not read the Monster Raving Loony party one yet!).
I take full responsibility for any credit card spending, loan overdraft and mortage payments.
No one forces anyone to buy a property if the price is deemed too high it is a personal choice - nothing to do with government or banks.

Mark7799

I see that ko1970 has removed virtually all their posts from the thread referred to. Was it a wind-up?