How has BR affected you? and your lives?

neilscot44

I have spent a lot of time today shredding old bank statements from over the past 10 years and looking through them i am amazed at the years i have spent trying to juggle money and debts a lot of which is from interest charges, all the worry i have suffered over the years. Shredding the statments, for me was symbolic, the end. I look forward to going BR in a couple of weeks and starting a new life.
Yes it may not be easy, but i am a lot wiser, getting into debt is really not worth the worry and ruining years of your life. Sometimes i guess you have to hit rock bottom which i have done. I have learned a lot, I have a different frame of mind, infact i think i am becoming a miser lol. I just refuse to spend a penny unless i absolutely have to! But its a great feeling. Material things are just not so important these days.
My relationship of 9 years broke up in November, I have to move house, at least i now have somewhere to go. On a good note ive lost 3/4 a stone being on the stress Bancruptcy, relationship break up, moving home, being ill diet!! Although its not a diet id recommend lol.

GEEGEE8

3 yrs and 1 month since I went bankrupt, so I'm past half way now and it's kinda flown by.

I was 24 when I went bankrupt and my partner at the time gave me great support through it, but eventually the relationship failed as I think he did lose respect for me and didn't seem to treat me like an adult, or have faith in any of my life decisions. The debts were all mine though, so if you're in it together then I would think it would be more likely to bring you together.

My current partner is the no debt type. Always pays off the credit card the same month, has masses of savings and looks down on debters. It took me 6 months to tell him I'd be made bankrupt just over a year ago, he took it badly, but we got through it and he doesn't comment on it now and treats me very fairly.

I'm at uni now and would never have been able to do this before due to the debt repayments, so it opened up a lot of new doors. Including leaving the ex and going it alone when the relationship came to an end.

I lived on my own for 18 months and really did learn a lot about finances etc, although I still seem to struggle to not let money burn a hole in my pocket lol! Living with my boyfriend of 2yrs now and we split the bills 50/50, something I've not done before and I feel so much more in control of my finances.

Anyhow I'm waffling!

In short, yes, so pleased I did it, should have done it sooner and although it's hard to get by without credit, it's definately worth it!

dojoman

BR is an personal experience and everyone will deal with it differently. Myself it has not had real impact on my life at all. I have had no problems with car insurance, house insurance and have just changed my utilities supplier for the 2nd time. I have also just taken out a new mobile phone contract as well. As long as you go in to it after having done your research about the consequences you will be fine.

sealsandsqueals

Is it certainly not an easy option but I do think the majority of the stress comes in the lead up to doing the big deed and making the decision to do it in the first place. I had months of sleepless nights thinking about telling my boyfriend my situation - he had little idea other than he frowned upon the fact I had a credit card! He has been amazing and it brought us closer - he's even popped the big question since!

I went BR back in August and it was only over the Xmas break that it started sinking in that I actually have the opportunity to make the most of my situation - I've decided to go back to university and study nursing - something I've also wanted to do - after ten years of working in office jobs that I don't enjoy. I would never have done this before BR.

I still have pangs of guilt and massive regret about bad career and relationship decisions that got me into such a mess but the days I feel like that are getting less and I'm trying to only look forwards. After suffering terribly from depression because of the debt, now I'm prioritising what is important in life - friends, family and health. And hopefully after lot of hard work and study, I'll have a job that I find rewarding too.

Overall, I think (and from reading people's stories on here) people hit the very bottom going through BR but it DOES get better and if you have been told it's your best option then it probably is.

Good luck.....we'll be here to help as much as we can.

ontheroad_2

It took us (both me and my OH went BR on the same date) about 9 months between realising we just couldn't service our debts anymore, to our BR day in court.
Life after BR hasn't changed - still have my job, our home, bank account, can get car/house/pet insurance etc with little problems (thanks to the advice of posters here). Apart from when applying for insurance, and my boss (its in my contract I had to tell them when I went BR) we have told no-one. If we had lost our house, things might have been different there, but that hasn't happened.

Good luck on the road to a new start OP - you'll get lots of support and advice here. I am very grateful to everyone who helped me, and continue to help me, with any aspect of BR I get confused about .

smileitconfusespeople_2

For yourselves you have done the hardest soul searching and most nerve wracking descion so well done ...We went Br 2009 we were discharged early,but it was the hardest thing was to admit that I/we needed to go Br and start again, I hope I will Never Never have to make a descion like that again, Having said that yes it was the best thing we did and we have learn't its ok to say" No" or "I can't " , As for the stigmas its there if you dont learn and want to move on, Those that judge you and not there to support you, are not worth beating your self up about lifes hard enough LOL.. but after making such a life changing descion nothing will ever come close . You will emerge stronger, more focus and look forwood each day , It will take time but the Sun does come out.It wont rain forever

Wishing you the bestest Karma going and good thoughts for Monday you are so very nearly there, come back and tell us how you get on , I now consider this forum to be my extended friend network.We all suport each other.
Most importantly best luck for the future .:A

jonathon01

neilscot44 wrote: »

I have spent a lot of time today shredding old bank statements from over the past 10 years and looking through them i am amazed at the years i have spent trying to juggle money and debts a lot of which is from interest charges, all the worry i have suffered over the years. Shredding the statments, for me was symbolic, the end. I look forward to going BR in a couple of weeks and starting a new life.
Yes it may not be easy, but i am a lot wiser, getting into debt is really not worth the worry and ruining years of your life. Sometimes i guess you have to hit rock bottom which i have done. I have learned a lot, I have a different frame of mind, infact i think i am becoming a miser lol. I just refuse to spend a penny unless i absolutely have to! But its a great feeling. Material things are just not so important these days.
My relationship of 9 years broke up in November, I have to move house, at least i now have somewhere to go. On a good note ive lost 3/4 a stone being on the stress Bancruptcy, relationship break up, moving home, being ill diet!! Although its not a diet id recommend lol.

Neil, it's great that you are moving on but if you haven't yet shredded all of your bank statements then I wouldn't shred any more as the OR may ask for your last few years' worth of statements once you are bankrupt!

Sue52

I had to accept BR as the only option back in October 2009, but glad to say I was discharged in April 2010. It was a very hard decision to make but glad I did, I had spent many sleepless nights worrying about my situation and was very stressed, it was all I could think about from morning till night. The build up, the paperwork, going to the court was a bit daunting but I have to say life is not so fraught anymore. The positive side of this is that I am more careful with my money, I do not buy what I can't afford and I never will again, so this has taught me a very important lesson. I will do without credit for the rest of my life !
I don't have many friends and have kept my BR to myself as I think I was ashamed that I could get into that situation.
I wish everyone the best of luck who is contemplating this step, it is not as bad as you think.

Classylady2010_2

It was the best thing I ever did, I did feel ashamed though but I dont necessarily think thats a bad thing, I felt ashamed that I had gotten into such a mess, that Id buried my head in the sand, it was all my own fault that I got into so much debt although I realise from reading some posts on here that its not always the case that some folk have horrid experiences through no fault of their own.
But however ashamed I feel, going Br saved my sanity and I have learnt my lesson, the hard way, but Ive learnt it.
Classylady

neilscot44

jonathon01 wrote: »

Neil, it's great that you are moving on but if you haven't yet shredded all of your bank statements then I wouldn't shred any more as the OR may ask for your last few years' worth of statements once you are bankrupt!

Thanks Jonathon, I'm Keeping 09/10 statements.. Think its good to keep statements for a couple of years, unlike me who had them going back to 02 lol..