How much do you spend on your child's Christmas?

jackieglasgow

vik there were also people being quite rude and incredulous towards people choosing to give their children "practical" presents too. Its the rather sad face of womankind - we can be really horrible to each other sometimes

Kimitatsu, mine don't have TVs upstairs either. Today is the first day I have ever questioned it, because they are off school sick, and I want them upstairs out of my way early, as I am fed up looking at them :rotfl:

Morty_007

jackieglasgow wrote: »

and I want them upstairs out of my way early, as I am fed up looking at them :rotfl:

:rotfl::T I have moments like this....we have a spare so if I ever DO get that desperate I can soon plug it in

vik6525

jackieglasgow wrote: »

vik there were also people being quite rude and incredulous towards people choosing to give their children "practical" presents too. Its the rather sad face of womankind - we can be really horrible to each other sometimes

Kimitatsu, mine don't have TVs upstairs either. Today is the first day I have ever questioned it, because they are off school sick, and I want them upstairs out of my way early, as I am fed up looking at them :rotfl:

Mine doesnt have a tv in his room either. He doesnt want one. He prefers to be around us, making conversation and having a laugh than locked away in his room.
In fact, when we first moved here, I gave him the largest bedroom in the house, but he didnt want it. And so now sleeps in the boxroom, which has literally just a bed in it.
And the largest bedroom is now my study.
God bless my sociable child!

UnderPressure

sunday_girl wrote: »

Under Pressure

Maybe other people don't place so much emphasis on material items as do? Maybe they don't place such huge importance on one day of the year? Maybe they don't want to build up their children's expectations to a level each year that may one day become unachievable (as it did for you)? Maybe they don't want their children overwhelmed with the quantity of presents on Christmas day? You are calling people foolish and miserly for spending less than what you consider to be an acceptable amount, yet you have openly admitted that you have made mistakes with the amount you have spent in the past. Why not live and let live? You choose to spend x amount on Christmas, someone else chooses to spend y - you are implying that people who have the means to spend x, but choose to spend y, are failing as parents which is wrong IMO.

No no no no no well kind of but still no!

OK the budget we had per child going back a few years was 1k per child this was far past extravagent and plain stupid but at the time was easily affordable and as "most" parents think we wanted the best we could prvide within our budget for our children.

Yes this cause issues with overwhelming which only fell into place a few years later when we spent a little less, our budget went from 1k per child to around 4-500 per child still a huge amount of money but again what we could afford without racking up debt, if we had jumped from 1k to 50 quid then yes you bet there would have been a few tears and tantrums.

I am not calling people foolish and miserly for spending less that "I" think is acceptable this is all some people can genuinely afford to spend these people have to look at their lives and figure out how to make things better, I am challenging the people who prattle on they spend 50 quid or less in some cases out of choice rather than means then continue to prattle on and insult people who spend more on their kids as though it is some kind of sin! I am challenging the few MSEr's who turn everything into a cometition of how little they can spend on everything christmas presents for the kids included as though they get somekind of gold star from the forum to say they have done well, whilst not for one single minute taking into account how their kids truly feel about being part of a frugal household when there is no need.

They then go on to tell us understnaidng and fabulous their child is for their failings in life and not providing more for them that at least puts them on an equal footing with their peers, when in relaity their poor child will be questioning why little johnny down the road and most of his classmates get loads more than he does maybe their parents love them more??? Nonsense exactly but do you think a 7yr old understands that? Do you think they should have to understand that? All because their parents are misers and would much prefer to save or have a holiday or buy boots or even pay their mortgage off at the expense of their childrens Christmas?

These parent in my opinion are well parents not worth having as far as I am concerned, these parents are the ones that wil be on the forum in 20 years moaning and groaning that their children spoil their grandchildren rotten at christmas and for the life of the will not be able to understand why, then when someone points out it is because they virtually punished them when they were kids with naff christmas's and they obviously want better for their own children my oh my they will be so hurt and again it wont be true it will all be nonsense.

There is a huge difference between being frugle because you HAVE to and being frugle because you are a tight wad that would much prefer to spend money on yourself rather than your kids. Yes we should all be a little frugal but when it gets to the extent of spoiling your kids childhood then sorry it is not necessary.

These same people will then be found in other places of the forum telling everyone about their holidays abroad, adn their own designer sofas and shoes oh and cars as well see they would much prefer to spend on themselves the word is selfish there are hundreds of them around here take a look, take the rose tinted glasses off and stop believing what drivvle people tell you, you will be amazed...............

UnderPressure

Loulou2010 wrote: »

just one other question.... since when did christmas become about presents?

Crikey a date mmmmmm I would say around the end of the 1980's probably when technology took a giant leap forward and kids aspirations changed, along with the fact around that time most people actually found themselves with a bit of money to spend.

Then the big hit for me was the late 90's again more disposable income better technology more things around to buy for kids, the keeping up with the jones's the nice fuzzy warm feeling parents got from pushing the boat out, it only needed a couple of years and then it was the norm sad but true.

As I said in an earlier post if my family spent more on my children at christmas than me I would be deeply ashamed of myself. If I did not have the money to spend I would feel a failure and if I did have the money to spend and chose not to then welll thats another sotry.

At least you can make it work for you so well done

Poly,put_the_kettle_on

Underpressure, thankfully not everyone puts the same value on "stuff" as you do. This "stuff" that your kids have so much of that it gets stuffed in a shed unwanted and unused & then taken to the dumps.

This "stuff" that is now adding to the mountain of waste...this "stuff" that cost valuable resources to make & transport. I'm not an evangelical tree hugger, but I do have the mental capacity to understand that the planet has finite resources. I'd rather keep a slightly healthier planet than keep on consuming in order to "keep up with the times." You say it's about that rather than keeping up with the Joneses...but do you not realise that it's the Joneses that make the times?

It's the fact that people get involved with this tit for tat inflationary giving that's gotten us into the situation we're in now. If people had the strength of will & common sense to not get involved with it, it wouldn't be an issue.

I simply cannot understand why you feel that children are "meant to be spoilt" or words to that effect. Really? The first dictionary hit for the word "spoil" brings up this- just in case you're unclear "To do harm to the character, nature, or attitude of by oversolicitude, overindulgence, or excessive praise." And you think that's ok?

I could easily double the amount we spend on our kids without too much hardship. Feel free to call me a miser. I'm giving them something better than "stuff"- they're being bought up to understand that they can't have everything they want all the time. Hopefully, this will help equip them for a life without incurring debts in order to "keep up with the Joneses"- sorry, I mean "times."

There are so many flaws in your diatribe I don't know where to start. The obvious one is that you, by your own mark, are an irresponsble loser for having lavished amounts of money on your kids that you couldn't sustain- and then pulling the rug out from under them. Didn't you save for unfortunate financial circumstances? Shock horror. How can you live with yourself? Letting them get used to a lifestyle like that & then taking it away. Here's a thought- if you'd spent half the amount on them at xmas and saved the other half, they would still have had lots of presents- but you might not have hit on hard times...and they'd never have felt the difference.

We should all be doing what we, in our own minds believe is best for our children. If you can afford lavish gifts, fair play to you- but I beseech you to see that your kids know the value, and the true costs of the disposable stuff they get through. However, getting caught up like herded sheep is ludicrous. It's a day. One day. If you're celebrating the birth of baby Jesus, then it's not about the "stuff" anyway, surely?

Oh, and as a "christian," I'm sure you know it's Rosary Beads.

SingleSue

UnderPressure wrote: »

Awww thats nice, my partner had loads of dolls when she was a kid most of them are in our loft now after our own daughters play with them now and again I love old presents like this it shows that at the time that doll meant an awful lot to you.

I wonder how many kids save presents from their 50 quid sacks to share with their own children one day............................

My actual point was that my parents spent very little on that doll as she was second hand (with half a foot missing and the back plate where the battery was supposed to be placed, broken and taped down)...but she ended up being my favourite gift.

I don't have the doll here, my nieces have the joy of playing with her when they go to my parents.

As for being prepared, I am afraid that sometimes there are not the pennies to go around, no matter how prepared you are. My spend is from being organised, it is from saving a few pounds here and there when it can be afforded but I certainly could not save £10 per week per child..it may sound like a little to some but to me, £30 a week is a huge amount and simply not possible (and no it is not wasted elsewhere, all excess funds after the basics are spent on the shortfall from DLA on the boys therapies, special foods, extra electricity, hospital trips, doctors appointments etc).

As for not being able to get them what they really want for less than £50...well it depends on the child doesn't it, my middle son is getting something he has coveted for months as is my youngest son...they are going to be so chuffed and over the moon with their items and they only cost £30.

Maybe my boys are different in that they don't aspire to loads of material things, maybe they take after me (I am not at all materialistic)...who knows but they certainly enjoy their Christmas despite a low spend.

UnderPressure

vik6525 wrote: »

Under Pressure.
I 'get' what you're saying.
I contributed to this thread initially, because Im really pleased that Ive been able to save up enough to treat my son beyond his wildest dreams this year.
But reading the rest of this thread has made me feel pretty yukky, because the implication from certain posters seems to be that if you spend a lot on your kids at Christmas, you're 'spoiling' them and raising little brats. Which is SOOO far from my situation its unreal.

Dont let them get you down you have done well for your child and from the sounds of it have saved ahrd to ensure you can give them what you want I say a big well done to you :T

The other posters seem to get some comfort from poking at people who believe children should be provided for and be given things they want, as a parent it is the most natural thing in thre world to want to provide the very best you can for your children, these misers spouting their usual nasty garbage feel the need to try and justify their own inadquecies and failures because they choose to not provide the best they can for their children. Sad really but hey ho they are not my mum and dad thank god

These are the children that in turn probaly also get bullied at school and dont have a lot of friends and find themselves constantly envying what their friend have sad place for a child to be me thinks

Then to make things worst their children hide their disappointment and hurt so mum and dad dont get upset an absolute shame really what must go through these poor children heads

You spend what you want and dont let anyone tell you any different children may not NEED material things but believe me they really like them

Merry Christmas to you and yours

MrsE_2

bestpud wrote: »

I just want to thank you as well for having an opposing view from most of us but putting it across without being rude or critical.

I don't know why people have to get personal as there is no need - it's just differences of opinion - nothing major.

:kisses3:Thank you

vik6525

SingleSue wrote: »

My actual point was that my parents spent very little on that doll as she was second hand (with half a foot missing and the back plate where the battery was supposed to be placed, broken and taped down)...but she ended up being my favourite gift.

I don't have the doll here, my nieces have the joy of playing with her when they go to my parents.

As for being prepared, I am afraid that sometimes there are not the pennies to go around, no matter how prepared you are. My spend is from being organised, it is from saving a few pounds here and there when it can be afforded but I certainly could not save £10 per week per child..it may sound like a little to some but to me, £30 a week is a huge amount and simply not possible (and no it is not wasted elsewhere, all excess funds after the basics are spent on the shortfall from DLA on the boys therapies, special foods, extra electricity, hospital trips, doctors appointments etc).

As for not being able to get them what they really want for less than £50...well it depends on the child doesn't it, my middle son is getting something he has coveted for months as is my youngest son...they are going to be so chuffed and over the moon with their items and they only cost £30.

Maybe my boys are different in that they don't aspire to loads of material things, maybe they take after me (I am not at all materialistic)...who knows but they certainly enjoy their Christmas despite a low spend.

Despite being on of the 'big spenders' on this thread, my son isnt materialistic in the slightest. When I asked him all those months ago what he actually wanted for Christmas, he couldnt think of a single thing. NOT because hes 'spoilt' and has everything, but because he genuinely couldnt think of anything. So do you know something? Ive bought him the absolute world. Im SOOO excited to see his face this Christmas morning, I really am, because Ive gone stupidly OTT, and bought him things he wouldnt DREAM of even asking for, simply because it wouldnt dawn on him that 'santa' (;)) would bring them for him.


And MrsE....
I hate to disagree with you my darling, but young ginger gets clothes and shoes as presents!
Its his birthday 5 days after Christmas, and every year, without fail, we go to town the day before, and he gets to run wild and play 'supermarket sweep' in Schuh and Animal! Its what he wants, so who am I to argue!

Hes his mothers child