References issue

clueless1

I thought that getting through the job interview was the hardest part of getting a job but getting my references is proving to be a nightmare.
I have provided two references, One is my ex employer where I have worked for 6 years and the other is a person who knows me and could give me a personal ref. I have been told that they can not accept a ref from this person because as I have not been employed for the last four years where I have been a sahm, I would need a ref from a 'professional person'.
I have moved about a bit and have finally found a home where I can grow my roots but I have only been here a year. I dont know any doctors or solicitors and I have only seen my GP once for my routine checkup when I had my baby. I have asked my daughters teacher and he has agreed to give me a ref. However, my daughter has only just started nursery in Jan so we have had limited interaction with the teacher. He sees me drop off and pick up my child and we have had a ten minute parents meeting and that is all. The teacher says that he will not lie (I dont expect him to) so I think that the form will be full of blanks or not applicables.
The employer ref will be from HR of ex company because my manager is no longer there so I am also worried that the ref will be basic with just dates?
I am so worried that I have got this far and only to lose this job because of poor references through no fault of my own.
I have worked hard all my life and I am worried that I will be penalised for taking time out to bring up my children. My family has struggled financially since I have not been working but we have never sponged off the state. I am sick with worry that if I dont get this job, we may lose our home and become another family who lives on benefits, which is not who I am. I do want to work and I have finally found a job, but I may lose it even before I get it.

KiKi

Hiya

You may have only been in your current place for a year, but do you not have a previous GP, lawyer, child's teacher who knows you better? They don't have to be local.

Similarly, do you have any friends who are teachers, doctors, lawyers, clergy etc? Have they provided you with a list of who they consider 'professional'? I'm sure if you have a chat with the prospective employer and explain the situation (but say you're doing your best to find someone), you can come up with a mutual solution. Do you have any relationships with previous colleagues / bosses who are happy to send letters in support (even though it's longer than 4 years)? You could offer the prospective employer some solutions (a friend who's a teacher, your daughter's nursery teacher, a GP from two years ago and two previous colleagues) and see what they say? Shows you're making an effort.

HTH
KiKi

clueless1

Thanks for your quick reply. I dont have any friends who are teachers or doctors etc..I do have a previous GP but I assumed that when I transferred out, my records will be transferred out too. But even if they do still hold my records, my GP wouldnt 'know' me to know who I am as a person. This current teacher is the only teacher I know as my child has only turned school age.
I have tried to explain the situation to them and have offered other references but they are insisting that it comes from a 'professional person' who currently knows me.
I dont know what else to do.

MrsManda

Have you attended any parent/child groups where someone may be willing to give you a reference?

Do you have a partner whose colleagues may be willing to give you a reference?

Colleagues from your previous employer?

Savvy_Sue

Health Visitor? thinking that if your child has only just started school you might have had more dealings with them.