feel like im making a fool of myself!!

zoesmummy_2006

basically ive been single 14 months, only at beginning oct I got flirting with my brothers best mate-who's 10 years younger than me!! Believe me I never thought he'd be at all interested in me cos im 30 and have 2 kids (my dd is 'in love' with him lol!!), but we started spending time together, he'd come round and we'd watch a film. He wanted to come out for my birthday and wanted to know what to get me, which i thought was lovely but told him he didnt need to get me anything. We slept together and scary as it was as it was first time with someone other than my ex husband, it was fantastic and i couldnt wait to see him again. But he went cold on me, said could we keep it between us as he didnt want to fall out with my brother/dad etc. so i left it at that, was disappointed but what could i do???

fastforward a couple weeks, he wished me happy birthday etc etc and out of the blue asked me to the cinema. so off we went, he bought my ticket etc, film wasnt my choice, but i would have watched anything with him lol. and he came back to mine after, and was soooo sweet cuddling me all night, but then when the morning came he left too early for my liking but said he'd be back later. He didnt.

A couple days later I found out something that i needed to inform him of, and when i told him i said that i'd understand if he didnt want to see me again (im not pg FYI!!) but he told me not to be daft and that he did. but, again, heard nothing from him.

Friday night i went out for my mates birthday, my brother informs me that all of a sudden he and his mate are going out in town too, but brother tells me to stay away from him lol. They were in a diff pub most of night, when we finally went into the one they were in i didnt know what to do with regards to him. I smiled n said hi but i didnt want to embarrass him by going up to him as they had another mate with them. Think my brother decided he didnt wanna be in same pub as me so they left, but as he was leaving he grabbed my waist and told me to have a good night.

Yesterday i text him asking if he'd like to go see new harry potter film with me next weekend and as yet have had no reply. TBH i dont think i'll get one. Hes an incredibly sweet guy and the problem is i could easily fall for him as when we're together its great and he's perfect with me. and i know theres a 10 year age gap but it doesnt bother me, and i wouldnt care who knew we were seeing each other but part of me think he does. He said the age gap wasnt an issue, me having kids wasnt an issue when i asked him, as i was worrying bout that.

im now wondering if i should just be honest with him and tell him that i really like him and i dont care who knows, but that if he doesnt feel the same then i dont want to see him again. maybe he's just too young lol xx

Errata

He's sleeping with you but wouldn't give you a big hello, kiss and cuddle in the pub when he saw you? Doesn't that tell you something?

strawberryfield2233

I have read your post carefully and I really feel for you as you obviously have strong feelings for him.
He is too young and unfortunately does not feel the same as you do about him.
If he really was interested he would have made much more effort and would be with you now without you having to ask.
Try and forget about him you deserve better there is no point pursuing him as you will end up hurt (((hugs))) really sorry

LJM

honestly imo he is using you get rid quick and leave it at that

lauren_1

I know a million people will say that age is just a number but that always comes from those who are already happy in a relationship with a older/younger person, sadly he doesn't want a relationship with you, it sounds like he just wants fun and a s**g from time to time.

He's 20 and acting like a 20 year old.

zoesmummy_2006

Youve all said exactly what i thought lol, i like the guy but im worth more than that

Mupette

Stop sleeping with him, to him your nothing but a slap per, and why let him get his oats, if he wants that type of girl tell him your not the one.

creamcrackers

just wondering, do you think he is worried about your brother finding out the both of you.perhaps this concerns him, or he maybe worried what other people may think.

It does sound like you are falling for him and i would personally step back and try and get with your life with the children. If a man is truly interested he would certainly make more of a effort.

zoesmummy_2006

I do think hes worried what my brother would say, he knows weve been out but i dont discuss my sex life with him lol. When i first asked him round i asked my brother if he'd mind cos its his best mate, but he was all for it, mainly to wind my ex husband up. But i dont rhink he likes the idea in reality as he told me to stay away from them other night-hence me not going up to him. The guy is quite shy and seems to think im super confident-believe me im not lol. Oh well had already resigned myself to giving up on this one!

Bloomin_Freezing2

Sorry but clearly he's not into you/after the same things as you. He keeps on going cold on you and has no consideration for yet you keep going back for more. I'd stop now before you turn into a complete bunny boiler. Take the hint that he's just using you. There's plenty of guys out there, you will meet someone right for you.

Would you honestly want a 'father figure' around your child that keeps letting you down? The ways he's acting seems to me that he's not mature enough for you and the kind of relationship you want.

GoToGal

zoesmummy_2006 wrote: »

I do think hes worried what my brother would say, he knows weve been out but i dont discuss my sex life with him lol. When i first asked him round i asked my brother if he'd mind cos its his best mate, but he was all for it, mainly to wind my ex husband up. But i dont rhink he likes the idea in reality as he told me to stay away from them other night-hence me not going up to him. The guy is quite shy and seems to think im super confident-believe me im not lol. Oh well had already resigned myself to giving up on this one!

Best let it go. In most cases, Occams razor applies. If a guy likes you and wants to be with you, he will act that way. He will want the world to know you are with him and be proud of your relationship. If he doesn't treat you like you are the best thing that's happened to him, well, you aren't.