Change in custody

Confused47

Good Morning

I'm hoping someone can give me some advice or perhaps someone has been in a similar situation?

I have been paying over £300 per month to my ex-wife for our child for over 3 years now and have always paid on time and never disputed it. I don't see my daughter due to her Mother not wanting me to and also the 350 mile distance makes it difficult. Since my ex wife and I split up, she has since become engaged and has another child with this person.

Around 4 months ago, I recieved a letter out of the blue from a solicitor explaining that my ex-wife had attempeted to commit suicide on three ocassions and she had now been sectioned under the mental health act. At the time of this happening, and emergency residency order had been granted to her new fianc!e in respect of my daughter. This had been granted some few weeks before but this is the first I knew of it.

The letter from the solicitors (her new fianc!e representation) went on to explain that the case would be being heard at court again in 3 days time as he was applying for a 6 month residency order as there was no signs of my ex-wife recovering soon and he didn't want her near the children in her unfit state. With my blessing, the residency order was granted to him as I felt it was in the best interest of my daughter since all her friends and her school where she is settled could provide her the best stability at this unsettling time.

During all this time, I have still been paying my maintenance to my ex wife even though she is not at present our daughters legal guardian. I'm now becoming increasingly frustrated as the money isn't getting through to my daughter as my ex wife is very poorly in hospital and legally doesn't have residency of our daughter. I know very little about the CSA as it's such a mindfield but as far as I can gather, maintenance is paid by the non resident parent to the resident parent which at the moment our daughter isn't with either!

Some advice would be very welcome as I'm very confused!!

tanith

What an awful situation , but my first instinct would to find out who and what this person is who has sole charge of your child... do you know anything about him? What sort of home/care is he providing for the child forgive me but that would my concern as a priority..

Confused47

Thanks for the reply. I know the man, my ex-wife's new fianc!e. They have a child together and he is a self made millionaire so he is providing for my daughter fianancially and provides her with a very stable loving home. He takes care of her very well and we talk regularly on the phone about my daughter and her school work etc. I trust him and would rather be paying him the money as I would know my daughter would be receiving it.

DX2

Child maintenance is regular, reliable financial support that helps towards a child's everyday living costs.
The parent without the main day-to-day care of the child (the non-resident parent) pays child maintenance to the parent with the main day-to-day care (the parent with care).
In some cases, the person receiving child maintenance can be a grandparent or guardian.
http://www.csa.gov.uk/en/maintenance/about.asp
As he has a residence order you must carry on paying child support.

Kimitatsu

The fiance has the residency order so he can apply/speak to the CSA and get them to send him the money instead OR you could make a private arrangement if your ex wife will close the case with the CSA.

Confused47

Thank you. As I said I'm happy to carry on paying for my daughter and would be more than happy to pay it to the fianc!e however the CSA are being very awkward about it! I thought it may be the case that the money should be paid to the guardian eg grandparents or in my case my ex's fianc!e but the CSA don't seem and want to know! They just want me to carry on paying my mum regardless of the fact the child isn't getting the money. Makes a mockery of the whole system!

Kimitatsu

Put everything in writing to them - if possible include a copy of the order and then if they still dont act you have a case for maladministration.

Not helpful right now I appreciate but if they think you will complain then things get done more quickly!

DX2

Confused47 wrote: »

I thought it may be the case that the money should be paid to the guardian eg grandparents or in my case my ex's fianc!e but the CSA don't seem and want to know! They just want me to carry on paying my mum regardless of the fact the child isn't getting the money. Makes a mockery of the whole system!

Why would you be paying csa to your mother? If you are paying child support via the csa then how is the child not getting the money?

Confused47

Sorry, typo error, I meant the child mother. The money isn't getting to my daughter as my ex is in 24/7 hospital care and under court orders, isn't allowed access to the children until she is stable and hasn't been passing the money on.

missbunbury

Kimitatsu wrote: »

The fiance has the residency order so he can apply/speak to the CSA and get them to send him the money instead OR you could make a private arrangement if your ex wife will close the case with the CSA.

My suggestion would be for the fiance to make a new application to the CSA against you, providing them with proof of the fact that he is now the person with care. It will help if he can get the child benefit transferred into his name first. The previous PWC's case will be closed once the CSA designate the fiance as PeWC, since a case cannot have more than one PWC. You mention the guy is well-off - once he is the PeWC for the child, he doesn't actually HAVE to take the money if he doesn't want to, it might be that the two of you would agree that the money could be better used to help you travel to see your daughter, or invested in an account ready for uni or whatever. As an aside, he would also be able to claim against the child's mother, should a time come where it would be appropriate to do so (I assume at the moment she has no income anyway) - a case can have two NRP's.

An alternative, if he doesn't want to do this, is that you could actually make your own application to pay maintenance to him. It's a bit more complicated in that it would have to be dealt with by a specialist caseworker, but I'm wondering whether he might prefer if you do it that way because then if the original PWC gets narky about "her" money stopping, he can explain it as being something that you instigated rather than him, if you see what I mean. Sounds like the two of you are dealing well with what must be a difficult situation, anyway, which I find admirable.