Can I have a life while clearing my debt?

135

Comments

  • Amatheya81 wrote: »
    Thank you everyone who took the time to reply. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who feels bogged down in the long hall sometimes.

    Also thank you for all the suggestions about things I could do. If anything it made me feel better because I'm already doing most of them. I do miss the gym, I used to be passionate about going to the gym and I was even taking classes in aerial acrobatics and now I just feel fat and flabby *sniff* But 2 years form now I'll be able to get back into it.

    As for the very controversial Sky thing. I've only kept it this long because the internet was the best I've found for the money. I discovered today that they now allow you to have Sky internet without TV so I've dropped the TV :j

    I've been debating with myself whether to respond to the negative posts or not. I've finally decided just to say that you should never judge someone without knowing them and their circomstances. In otherwords if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all.

    Good luck to everyone who's on the long hall. We will all make it one day and I for one am very gratfull for the support I've found on this website which has made it just that little bit easier to get there. :beer:

    Hi Amatheya

    Another way to look at things is you have paid off 26% of your debt in only 2 years!! This is a fantastic achievement!

    :T:T:T:T:T:T

    The other thing to remember is as you are reducing the balances (if you are paying interest) is that the money you are paying will go more to paying off the balances and so you will start paying things off more quickly!

    Another way to look at this is that you are learning a lesson for later life. Once you have learned how to be frugal and pay off your debts you will use that experience to actually save money for other things like holidays etc without having to take out credit.

    It is tough sometimes, and occasionally you have bad days, but keep posting back on the forum and the majority of DFW's will be happy to offer support.

    Best

    SnV
    LBM & Debt July 2010 [STRIKE]£19,000[/STRIKE] now - £11,619.60 Long Haul Supporter #247

    Remember Income > Expenditure = MSE Heaven :A and Income < Expenditure MSE Hell :(

    Current STB (sticking to budget) Counter - day 109 (Personal Best - 109 days!)
  • Hiya, I cant really add anything as everyones advice has been really helpful (well nearly everyones!) but I do understand how you feel and like most others we originally cut back on everything and then realised it wasnt a long time solution so we bought back one or two luxaries, our personal fave is exchanging club card points for restaurant vouchers :)

    Also I just want to add its such a shame that not everyone can be positive, and also I do have to wonder why someone who has no debts and has always lived within their means (well done btw) is hanging out in a debt free wannabe forum?

    Anyway keep up the good work :D xxx
    :j6 debts cleared since joining MSE:j
    :eek: Remaining debts... Very / Halifax Loan/ A&L / Virgin cc / Lloyds / Sister :eek:
    :smileyheaGetting Married 04.12.10 - The MSE way :smileyhea
    :dance: Making this house a home :dance:
  • Amiee
    Amiee Posts: 8 Forumite
    Amatheya, your post looked very familiar to me even down to the Lloyds loan amount! I had to do a double take to see if I had posted it and forgotten! My situation is just like yours and I feel that I am missing out, but trying to do the same and look ahead rather than at the present. I keep telling myself that in 3 years I will have paid all my debts off and will have a good lifestyle. Delayed gratification sucks!

    Good ideas from everyone else though - well, almost everyone....
    I saw two shooting stars last night
    I wished on them, but they were only satellites
    It's wrong to wish on space hardware
    I wish, I wish, I wish you'd care
  • Lottebear wrote: »
    This why many of the people on here do little things like surveys, so they can spend that little bit of money on themselves

    Damn right, I felt like I'd won the lottery when I got my £40 pay out from onepoll recently :)
  • Amiee wrote: »
    I keep telling myself that in 3 years I will have paid all my debts off and will have a good lifestyle. Delayed gratification sucks!

    This made me laugh. You are quite right delayed gratification does suck... but it's only 3 years. I write a reminder on my calener evey month reminding me how many months there is to go to keep me looking at smaller targets. It helps a bit.


    Lottebear & InaTizzy
    I wish I had the time to do serveys. I used to but I've got a demanding full time job. I'm a carer for my mother and I'm a freelance artist. It doesn't leave much time... Hang on, I think I've just realised that the reason I don't have a life has nothing to do with money it's just that I have no time to have a life! :rotfl:
  • euronorris
    euronorris Posts: 12,247 Forumite
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Post PPI Party Pooper
    Amatheya81 wrote: »
    This made me laugh. You are quite right delayed gratification does suck... but it's only 3 years. I write a reminder on my calener evey month reminding me how many months there is to go to keep me looking at smaller targets. It helps a bit.


    Lottebear & InaTizzy
    I wish I had the time to do serveys. I used to but I've got a demanding full time job. I'm a carer for my mother and I'm a freelance artist. It doesn't leave much time... Hang on, I think I've just realised that the reason I don't have a life has nothing to do with money it's just that I have no time to have a life! :rotfl:

    Have you seen the snowball calculator? http://www.whatsthecost.com/snowball.aspx

    It's great and keeps me motivated. You can play around with it too, and see how much of an effect paying extra, or less, can have on your DFD. :D

    I know how you feel too. I was feeling very much like you only a few months ago, and missing friends and family terribly too. So, I reduced the repayments slightly (am overpaying on CC), to allow me to join a Qi Kwan Do class and have a treat once a month. Otherwise I'll only end up crashing completely!

    Can't wait for payday this month. That Virgin CC will be GONE!!! Ahh, it's the small victories you hold onto! :D
    February wins: Theatre tickets
  • poorbabe
    poorbabe Posts: 896 Forumite
    First Post First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Lovely to see more positive responses than negatives. Helps to keep us plugging away.

    I'm in a similar situation to many on here and realised that the little treats helped keep me on track. That and the now reduced overdraft on occasion!

    I've only recently returned to Sky after a few years and am glad I was able to afford it (payrise). I also bought a bike (interest-free credit) again using a portion of the payrise and those two items are well used.

    I also update my monthly debt total and it's great to see the figures go down, especially when I'm feeling unhappy about my life overall. I've got a trip to NY planned with some good friends in 2012 and whilst I won't be debt-free by then, I'll be 2/3 of the way there which is a whole lot better than I ever imagined 2 years ago.

    So yes, it is possible to have a life whilst clearing debts - albeit at a reduced rate. Watch out world when we finally have our own money!!! :j:j
  • I've come to this thread a bit late but thought I would add a few things that helped me on my debt free wannabee journey.

    Write down a list of the FREE things you enjoy doing. Get the list as long as possible. Write down even what you presently think as trivial. It's amazing how important these become.

    Everything from enjoying a lovely sunrise to vouchers (I've just printed off a free £5 Debenhams voucher) to big things.

    Once you've got your list diarise for when you are going to do them.

    Keep adding to the list.

    It's amazing what you can do for free!

    Mentally tick off what you've saved.

    It's all about your mindset. What you think of as 'not having a life' could be a life of luxury to someone else.

    As the much maligned Prince Charles is once credited with as saying 'If you were born in the second half of the twentieth century in Western Europe you have won life's lottery'

    Not a bad way to look at things when you are lamenting that 'I haven't got a life'.

    Raise the bar when you can afford to.

    It worked for me. I've got a target date of January 2012 to have £100,000 in the bank, which when I think where I started from (£42,000 down), I would have certified you as insane if you had suggested I could get there.

    Rant over but I hope this helps.
  • ..those real friends who you can be honest with, not the ones who you have to keep up appearances for..keeping up appearances is expensive!
    You have got to be able to share the pain and find the laughs with good friends - both real and on mse....:)
    I found myself laughing my socks off at the idea that I am doing online surveys because I don't have a spare bean, even though I work fulltime and have a salary that's above average... but I fell into living beyond my means and now it's payback time.
    Remember the fun you had spending all that money and just think that one day you will be able to do that again but as a wiser, more discerning spender!!:T
    In the meantime, consider all the things that you pay for that you might be able to do yourself...
    I'm going to invest in a long brush and do my own windows - that windows cleaner is fleecing me for £8 every fortnight!
    I am teaching myself tiling and saving hundreds on labour costs...obviously I will have to live with the slightly less than perfect results...but it's quite fun and good exercise :p
    Christmas presents this year are going to be home made chocolate truffles and other things that I have spotted on the wonderful mse website...

    You are definitely not alone, we are all living from one payday to the next - it does feel like wishing your life away but try to embrace it by remembering the value in things that don't cost money, while keeping your eye on that light at the end of the tunnel!

    Wishing you and everyone else the best of luck!
  • lutzi1
    lutzi1 Posts: 2,703 Forumite
    First Post First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Well done for what you've achieved so far, and remember it will get easier as the amount of interest you have to pay each month goes down. Don't get disheartened, there is a lot of support out here.

    Lots of good advice on here from other folks, and it's good for us all to remember we are not the only ones having to tighten our belts - let's face it, few of us are not going to have to! I love the ingenuity of people thinking of new ways to have fun - for me music has been a source of great joy and relaxation. There's plenty of free or very cheap software to download and you can get writing or arranging your own material, and I've set up my own quartet which is great fun and gives a lot of pleasure to us and to others. You could join a local choir - singing really raises the mood, you get to meet others, it's a very cheap night out, and as has been said no heating costs at home. But obviously everybody has their own thing, I love the Come Dine With Me theme. Alternatively you could do a Desert Island Discs theme where people take it in turns to choose their favourite tracks and explain the significance of them in their lives - could be a great way to get to know others better ?

    I love the positivity of MSE-ers - you're all brilliant!
    Hope is not a strategy.
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