Newbie SOA - fresh eyes with any ideas?

Percy1983

Out of interest do you parents know you have debts to pay? with them being on an IVA they have clearly got somewhere towards over there heads in the past and if they knew you are in debt they might actually want to help you avoid the same fate.

DebtDodger

That's a good question! I haven't told my parents the extent of my debt although they know I had CC's as I asked my dad to cut them up for me when I cancelled them (I didn't trust myself!)

I suppose I don't want them to be disappointed. They got into debt for a "good" reason if there is such a thing! It was legal fees over a 5 year court case which they lost. I got into debt by shopping, buying holidays, mostly all for my ex, trying to keep him happy which didn't work anyway! The shame makes me not want to admit it to people because really, I have nothing to show for it But I know I should...

PerfectPeaches

Debt Dodger

My parents were disappointed with me when I finally told them of my debt and although they were disappointed they had been there themselves and were incredibly supportive and still are. Beleive me, once you tell them the relief feels so great, its one of the hardest steps to take but once you do, you actually feel so much better!

Peaches x

Percy1983

I think it would be a good idea to tell them because right now even an extra £50 a month in you pocket would help masssively and would £450 instead of £500 really hurt them?

Of course I don't know the in & outs of there finances but I do think its worth talking to them.

Right now you are at a point where I was a while ago where you are in a bit of a gridlock, you can clear payments but aren't making much headway into your debt.

In my case I cut my expenditure as much as I could a sold a few things on ebay and next I knew my payments where making a dent, then the more of a dent I made the less interest I was charged so I could then pay more the month after.

Basically in short cut absolutely everything you can for a few months just to try and break the gridlock, then as you get further into it you can 'spare' more mone for entertainment, we are now at the point of having £200 a month for whatever we want and still reduce balances by over £1300 a month.

Basically there is light at the end of the tunnel but right now you need throw every penny you can at these debts, it will get easier I promise.

DebtDodger

Thank you Percy that is great advice and although it will be hard it's such a positive motivator to see someone who has come out the other side! I find it easy to do the "short-term-hardship" rather than longer-term-not-so-hardship so a burst will be doable and should help motivate me if I can get rid of even 2 of the smaller debts (Ulsterbank and HMRC) by the Spring. :T

Percy1983

By all means if you cut everything until its all paid you will get there quicker but remember its not a race if you want to treat yourself here and there as long as the overal balance reduces every month thats fine, its all about a balance, but the more you pay the more that balance tips in your favour and the morw you can spare. So its a frugal life for the immediate future but it will get better.

I think much like I was a while ago, you have got the edge and looked over but never fell off, you have had an early light bulb moment before things have got desperate so you should be proud of yourself.

kbelfast

Hi DebtDodger,
I know what it's like to become a lone parent, and I really feel for what you've gone through. You've come really far and are doing really well to get on top of your finances.

I noticed you said "I don't get any benefits because I earn £29k". I have a friend (a lone parent) who earns a bit more than that and receives Child Tax Credit. There's a good page on moneysavingexpert.com about checking what benefits you're entitled to - click the Income & Family link and you'll find a link to the Benefits Check Up page. There's a link there to a site that really does only take 5 minutes or so to see what you're entitled to. I encourage you to check it out. There's also details on the page on how to go about applying if it looks like you might be entitled. The initial form can be a bit of a pain to fill in, but you only have to do it once. Strictly speaking, it's not really a benefit as such, it's crediting you back some of the tax that you've already paid.

If you're entitled, it's probably not a great deal of money, but it's better in your pocket than the tax man's! (If you do apply for Child Tax Credit and are successful, just make sure you keep HMRC up to date with any changes to your circumstances, so that you don't end up having to repay any overpayments.)

Keep going, you can do it.
K

tealady

Hi
Speaking as an ex smoker I would have a chat with your GP to see if you can get nicotine replacement on prescription. When I quit ( a few years ago) I got 8 weeks worth of replacement for 1 prescription. Was worth every penny.