Burnout? can't cope with daily problems

goodgirl80

jpwhittle wrote: »

I'm so glad i came across this thread tonight. I'm in such a bad place right now. Not through work but through bullying (and im 30 so shouldnt get bulied at this age). I've been seeing a CPN for a while over it and things were getting better for a while. I had started to manage my thoughts about the bullying and was coping but then we found out we were moving and things got 100 times worse. We finally moved on monday but for the last 4 weeks i havent slept due to recurring nightmares about me being shot or me killing someone and not being able to get rid of the body. Last night i dreamt i was shot in the head, wasnt killed but was shot. Every time i woke myself up in a panic i could still feel the bullet in my head.
My OH wants me to see the doctor to help me sleep but im so frightened ill sleep and not be able to wake up from the nightmare. I feel so stupid, Ive moved away from the bullying now so dont know why its effecting me still. Today was hard as the kids have done nothing but be naughty and pushed well passed all their limits resulting in me completly losing my rag tonight. Just spent ages crying as i feel ive completly lost the plot. I would see the doctor tomorrow but my little boy is having an operation in the morning wich is adding to my worries. I hate what im about to put him through even though i know its essential. Its only a minor op but thats what makes it worse, he isnt hurting now but he will tomorrow and i feel so guilty.
I just want some peace and some quite, i want the pain in my head to stop and to just relax a little.
I dont know when ill next see my cpn due to the move, he said he would pick me up at this med centre (we have only been here 3 days) but i feel si desperate, I m ean what kind of person dreams these dreams, im certainly not feeling normal right now.

Dreams are weird, you don't need to think you're not 'normal' because of dreams, we all dream some odd and upsetting things at times. What it might be though, is an indicator of the stress you are suffering. Are you working at the moment? Can you get some time off, maybe a grandparent or family member to take the kids out for a bit? I'm sorry to hear your little boy has to have an operation, I hope he recovers well and you get that off your mind at least. Come back soon and let us know what happens x

jpwhittle

Thanks goodgirl, I dont work at the moment partly due to the move partly because id be working for nothing. Our parents live along way away as we are currently based in cyprus so we are pretty much alone. My son has had his op and is recovering pretty well, he wasnt so good when they woke him up he was so angry like ive never seen him before and like he wanted to punch someone, but to be honest if someone had just done that to any bloke i think they would want to punch someone to. Hes doing well though and now running round like a madman, its getting difficult to make hime sit down again lol.
I'm feeling a bit more positive today thankfully. The kids have been good especially the youngest while her brother had the op, and crying for my little boy gave me an excuse to get it all out.

miss_independent

goodgirl80 wrote: »

I've had people suggest a thyroid problem before...thanks. Have you seen a Dr. about your issues or do you think you can sort it yourself?

Sorry, I only just saw this . I'm going to the doctor next week to ask for a blood test as I'm really tired all the time and am having heavy periods but I'm trying to sort the stress out myself as I do bring alot of it on myself; procrastinating and letting things build up. I come from a family of stressheads who live on their nerves so I've never really known how to have a calm life lol, guess I have to figure it out for myself.

old_motters

I've been here, last year. My wife was expecting a baby, we had a house remodel, boiler problems, I had a stressful new job etc etc etc

I buried my head in the sand and thought, everyone else is coping with their lives I should be able to cope with mine. Two weeks before our first child was born I burned out, properly crashed and burned. I became completely dysfunctional to the point where I was almost hospitalised and was referred by my doctor to a social worker/crisis team for two weeks. This meant daily visits by a social worker who would counsel and help me construct activities for my day. It was really that basic. I was also placed under the care of a Psychiatrist who put me on strong sedative medication and anti-depressants. I was signed off work for nearly 3 months. I wasn't allowed to drive for a couple of months. It's taken me 9 months to get back on my feet and back to normal.

I relate this experience in the hope that others do not bury their head in the sand as I did. If there are warning signs; tearfulness, insomnia, mood swings, feelings of helplessness, impulsiveness, extreme anxiety amongst others, you must get help.

traveller

miss_independent wrote: »

Sorry, I only just saw this . I'm going to the doctor next week to ask for a blood test as I'm really tired all the time and am having heavy periods but I'm trying to sort the stress out myself as I do bring alot of it on myself; procrastinating and letting things build up. I come from a family of stressheads who live on their nerves so I've never really known how to have a calm life lol, guess I have to figure it out for myself.

Hi, another one glad to have found this thread!I too have these issues. I just feel a real mess,tired and no concentration what so ever. After having my 4th and last child i suffered post natal depression-especially when i returned back to work.

I feel i really burned myself out during the pregnancy as i worked right up to the day before my due date as i needed to maximise the full maternity pay. This was particularly because my beloved last born was as the result of a disastrous reconcilliation with my ex. I felt i'd let my older 3 kids down with all the fireworks that were going on as i chose to keep my son (my ex did not want this and felt silly and embarrassed at having gone back to him) My son was born in 2008 I returned to work after 8 months and that was when I just couldn't cope anymore and in all honesty contemplated all sorts of things!

The constant tiredness of having to go from one part of London to the other and 6 train rides a day instead of two bus rides as the only nursery my son got into was miles away , then work politics started to take their toll. In August 2009 my mood lifted dramatically after coming back from holiday as the 'timer' on my life had stopped and the depression seemed to be at bay. But over the last few months I can feel it creeping back and i have started to do something i would never have done before-just take time unnannounced from work,(i do ring in or book the time-not just fail to turn up!) be it a day or a week. Whereas before if i or my youngest was ill i'd still go in-not anymore. I find when i do this i can face everything again.I'm still tired all the time though and fed up! Sometimes at work i'm so productive, other times i'm just begging the clock to go faster. I really don't know what's wrong with me and can never sleep enough!

I love travelling, but can't even be bothered to plan my holidays anymore! I get stressed until i've booked, then loose all interest and am too tired to plan anything.I do have a boyfriend now, but due to practicalities of the children ,i go to him he does not come to my house. This has been going on a year, but it is starting to feel more hassle than it's worth as i feel too tired to see him on our designated friday evenings!

goodgirl80

jpwhittle wrote: »

Thanks goodgirl, I dont work at the moment partly due to the move partly because id be working for nothing. Our parents live along way away as we are currently based in cyprus so we are pretty much alone. My son has had his op and is recovering pretty well, he wasnt so good when they woke him up he was so angry like ive never seen him before and like he wanted to punch someone, but to be honest if someone had just done that to any bloke i think they would want to punch someone to. Hes doing well though and now running round like a madman, its getting difficult to make hime sit down again lol.
I'm feeling a bit more positive today thankfully. The kids have been good especially the youngest while her brother had the op, and crying for my little boy gave me an excuse to get it all out.

I think it sounds like the kids are a major stress factor for you at the moment. Is your partner hands on with them? keep smiling x

jpwhittle

Dads very hands on, hes a great dad with them, and great at staying up while im crying for putting noah through his op. Although had a bit of breath space this morning when noah heard me saying something and replied "Im ok with my op mummy im not bothered by it at all i know i need to wee now" lol the kids are ace really and the best things about me i just wish i was a better mum for them.

charlies-aunt

Is it something in the air?

I feel really down atm - wornout and worn down.

Things have been getting tougher and tougher over the years - redundancy, serious illness, high earnings replaced by minimum wage, bereavement, family problems, too much month for not enough money . . . . and realisation that I'm in the final quarter of my life without accomplishing much.

I've tried hard to be a good person and citizen, worked hard, taken care of family, children and pets, never been in trouble etc

I'm tired of being a spartan . . . . just want to sit and have a good howl most days - but no time to fit this in with everything else.

Life could be worse - just have to count your blessings, keep calm and carry on

RacyRed

charlies-aunt wrote: »

Is it something in the air?

I feel really down atm - wornout and worn down.

Things have been getting tougher and tougher over the years - redundancy, serious illness, high earnings replaced by minimum wage, bereavement, family problems, too much month for not enough money . . . . and realisation that I'm in the final quarter of my life without accomplishing much.

I've tried hard to be a good person and citizen, worked hard, taken care of family, children and pets, never been in trouble etc

I'm tired of being a spartan . . . . just want to sit and have a good howl most days - but no time to fit this in with everything else.

Life could be worse - just have to count your blessings, keep calm and carry on

Gawd! I could have written this too. You have described how I currently feel perfectly.

The hardest part now is trying not to worry about what the hell else is going to hit me.

(((((hugs)))))

goldenleaf_2

When you think positively you will be less likely to see the negative in things and therefore
your environment will appear to change. It is all a matter of perception. When you choose
to adopt a positive attitude, you will most likely start to notice more than ever the little things

that you used to take for granted and that will have an encouraging effect on you.