Burnout? can't cope with daily problems

Keeping_Positive

Hello

I know how you feel and doing the same as you at the moment ie have time to do work and can do work throratically but blank at the thought of actually doing it. My way of coping is to take a day off and catch up when I am back on track but that only works if the family/day to day problems are being worked on. Is there no way around seeking medical help as cauncelling and anti ds have been invaluable to me over the years. No cure as such but I have better copping mechanisims (sp).

What about a call to the samaritans at least you can vent to a real person and itds confidential.

(hugs)

ninky_2

so you're on anti-depressants but don't want counselling...surely the ads are already on your medical record? i don't see how having counselling can be seen as worse?

anti depressants are usually only prescribed when you have biological symptoms of depression whilst counselling can be to help people through all sorts of difficult situations (grief etc).

ellay864

amalis wrote: »

Thank you, Sassyblue! i really started to fell that I am not good enough and anything I do is just.. not enough. I was cheering up everyone at home for a long time, I was the one who was saying "it will be ok, look at me- I am smiling". And its too big pressure now on me, I have no right to be weak now.

Firstly depression caused by excess stress is NOT a weakness - it is a physiological response to external pressures. And you have absolutely as much 'right' as anyone else to succumb when those pressures get too much.
Please take note of the others you have said your records have to stay private. Don't use that as an excuse not to seek help - whether that be in the form of counselling or medication. You do need help of some sort as you obviously aren't functoining normally at the moment. Lots of us have been there. I was in a similar position some years back and fought against getting help as I hated the label of depression and refused to admit that's what was wrong with me. Looking back I wish I'd got myself some help much sooner as I let things get too far.
You obviously are committed to work and to other people, but you are far more use to them when you're firing properly on all cylinders so please please go and seek advice. Even on here there will a lot of useful advice if you search on depression or stress
Take care x

Vaila

i guess you need to give yourself some "me" time, even if its just telling yourself while at work etc tonight im going to have a relaxing bath , it means its something to look forward too, you could even treat your self to a nice bath bomb .

brighthair

someone told me that "depression is a sign of being strong for too long"
I'm going through a similar thing at the moment, crying all the time and tiny things seem impossible, I smashed a cup the other night and just started sobbing! Having some time off work, eating well, doing some form of exercise and getting enough sleep are important. Exercise is probably the last thing you feel like doing but honestly, it does help. I plug my Ipod in, and it seems to relieve the stress

amalis

Good morning,
a bit of update here. Yesterday I had a ncie bath and went to sleep early. Today I feel less tired, although I look tired. My colleagues at work even asked me what is wrong with me because I don't look like my usul self. This was very unpleasant because I know today I did my best to look good.
Anyway, now at work I will try to do one thing at a time. I hope I can catch up or at least to be less stressed if I don't.
I also have a job interview on Thursday (yes, at the same time I am looking for a new job.All at he same time) and I don't know how I will go through it.

sassyblue

amalis honey, well done for taking some time out for yourself. You must be tired with all that's going on so don't worry about your colleagues comments - it's actually nice that they noticed and cared enough to ask

Let us know how you get on today, shut out all thoughts and spend some time on that deadline. Like you say, one thing at a time

Good luck with that interview

amalis

Sassy, I love how you are turning things into positive :T Thank you for your care. It is really helping me when I know that someone -even only in Internet- cared enough to pop in to my thread and say some good words to me.
I found some Bach remedies at home, started to take them. They used to help me before, so hope this time they will do the trick as natural a-deps as well.
I want to live, I want to be happy, I want to feel strong and it is so horrible when you simply can not!

beckseven

I was in a similar position to you about four years ago. I had just had my first child when my mum was diagnosed with cancer and had to have a series of serious operations along with chemo etc. My world just came crashing down, I was struggling to deal with being a first time mum and due to the serious situation with my mum I had noone to speak to about this-i didn't see a family member for 6 months except for when I visited my mum and she was so sick she couldn't cope with me and my DS visiting more then once every 3 weeks. I went back to work and was having serous issues with coping with leaving my son at nursery but I just kept smiling and telling everyone everything was fine-telling my family like you that I was the strong one and I was coping so well. Thankfully my mum recovered and again as she was still weak I decided that i must carry on and do my mum proud at Christmas and invited the whole family round for Christmas lunch and did everything from scratch. Anyway what happened was that in the new year I had a sort of breakdown when I couldn' t stop crying and thinking about walking in front of buses and strange things like that. It was a kind of delayed reaction to dealing with stress and supressing it and your really can't do this for long. I so wish I had talked to people about this-I understand if you feel you can;t let off steam to family but please see a councellor and let off steam to them. You are not weak at all-you have been acting in a superhuman way and you need to give yourself a break. I read in a stress book that you should write a to do list then go through each entry allocating 10 minutes to each task first, then 20 then half an hour in turn and it really does help make things less daunting. All the bestx

londoner1998

amalis wrote: »

I am very grateful to those answered! I am reluctant to go to GP at the mo because once I spoke to her and she wanted to refer me to counselling which I think is great, but I can not have this record in my medical file. I want to try my best to solve this problem on my own.
I had enough time to finish my work, but I did not do anything. I felt I just lost interest in work and in life in general. I was just sitting there and looking at papers.
I usually talk with my mum on the phone every day, but I haven't called her since last week. I just can't force myself to smile and to pretend I am ok.

Amalis

you are tired- I've been there and know how you feel. My advice would be: stop putting pressure on yourself. Take 5 mins to just go, grab a coffe/tea/drink and sit down quietly... then, do as they said before and put your priorities on a list- if you need help and do't think you can do it all, speak to you boss and discuss yyour priorities, present him/her with a solution ie- may be delegate it to someone else or move ther deadline. Don't leave until the last minute.

Give you mum a call, you don't have to pretend- just say, 'oh, so busy, it is getting tight, I could do with time off ...'.

And remember that all the stress of the previous year has built up on you and your body is telling you that you need to pay attention and TLC to it- that's all that's going on. It is very important you do this before you start to feel worse.
Can you take a day off , may be a Friday or Monday to just have a lie in or stay at home? I do this when things get very heavy on me at work (it can be manic) and the extra time to rest really helps me to recover my focus (I work in a creative enviroment and need to be sharp).
This tip was passed on to me by an award-winning radio producer and it helps you avoid melt-down.

And no, counselling sessions will not appear on your file. I did it thorugh work and saved my life when I was like you, really bogged down with stuff...

Take care of yourself and remember there is nothing wrong with feeling like this



PS- I saw you have an interview lined-up- well done!! I was just like you, looking for a new job while recovering from bereavement. You will go through it, you will be just fine. Remember two things- you have done fabulously just getting the interview, so give yourself a pat on the back. Second, remember that whatever happens, it will be fine. I went through 9 months of interviews until I got my current job- so chin up, deep breath and good luck!!
Come back for moral support if you need it.