I need help to be more casual!

gs1967

Thanks! There are some great ideas, I must admit that I've stayed away from the legging look because I did do it the last time .

I don't think I look particularly sophisticated, just smart and "worky". I do wear a lot of black, and I'm a bit sick of it to be honest.

I'm usually wearing some variation of smart black trousers with sometimes a coloured top and black cardigan or just a black jumper...see, no inspiration at all!:rotfl:If the outfit isn't "together" in the shop then I have no imagination at putting one together, unless it's all black of course.

My husband is useless, I'll ask him what he'd like me to wear and he'll just shrug and say "something casual" or "something feminine" or "well not THAT for a start" :rotfl:

I don't think it helps that I don't actually like clothes shopping, so when I do, I buy everything in one go, so that I know it all matches and then never buy odd bits and pieces to go with it all!

whitelillies

Maybe try instead of going on a mission to try and find something just go for a good look around and try things on you wouldnt ever dream of wearing. Youle be surprised, ive found a few clothes like that. Im trying to find a pencil skirt and a smart dress, but can i? Nooo and thats always the way.

Jacks_xxx

:wave: I agree with the peeps saying that anyone can wear dresses and tights. Just show as much of your leg as you're happy with.

I think a lot of women get in a rut like this because we only let ourselves buy clothes for work because we understand the need to look good at work and we don't feel guilty for spending money on ourselves in this way. However, we see casual clothes as somehow less "necessary". I think you need to decide that casual clothes are important too and give youself permission to experiment.

What about treating yourself to some casual tops and casual shoes or boots to dress down your black trousers and skirts? You could try a check shirt or a stripy long sleeve T shirt?

Do you think you would benefit from a session with a department store personal shopper? It's always good to get an impartial view, and they will work to your brief and devise outfits for you to try on.

The last time we went to London they had a personal shopper service in the flagship Top Shop so it's not just about posh and expensive labels.

You could try flicking through the online stores for a few shops and see if anything grabs you?

What about something like this little dress with tights combo from Next?

http://www.next.co.uk/shopping/women/tailoredlooks/9/2?extra=sch&n=women&pid=735-408&exclude=00AA0600|00A00&returnurl=/shop/gattgender-women-cat-d

Or this one?

http://www.next.co.uk/shopping/women/signature/6/1?extra=sch&n=women&pid=733-217&exclude=00AI00|00A00&returnurl=/search%3fp%3dQ%26lbc%3dnext%26uid%3d810243

or this one?

http://www.next.co.uk/shopping/women-plus-size-collections/dresses/3/2?extra=sch&n=women&pid=737-644&exclude=00AI00|00A00&returnurl=/search%3fp%3dQ%26lb

If you go shopping in one of the larger Next stores they will be only to happy to help you to combine outfits.

(I promise I don't work for Next and the same is probably true of any number of high street and online retailers! :D I'm just familiar with Next! :D

memelalou

I'm another one who agrees with linen trousers. They look casual and stylish.
trousers
http://www.next.co.uk/shopping/women-petite-collections/trousers/4/1?extra=sch&n=women&pid=495-351&exclude=00AZ00%7c00A00&returnurl=%2fsearch%3fp%3dQ%26lbc%3dnext%26uid%3d39275277%26ts%3dv8%26w%3dlinen%2520trousers%26af%3d%26method%3dand%26filter%3dsubset%253a4201%26nxtv%3d0%26nxti%3d0%23495%2d351&bct=%26quot%3bLinen%20Trousers%26quot%3b
{Hope this link comes up with the brown pair}

slim fitted sleeveless tee {in white}
http://www.littlewoods.com/love-label-pack-of-3-vests/657935666.prd?browseToken=%2fb%2f1777%2c21390%2fo%2f3&trail=1589-1776-1777-21390&prdToken=/p/prod4683598-sku71116

slim fitting cardigan
http://www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/prod_10001_10001_103010328888_-1?breadcrumb=Home~Women~Knitwear

I realise it's not as casual as jeans and a tee, but i think it's a nice stop gap.

gs1967

Jacks and Meme, I love everything you've linked to, I think I'll be going to Next tomorrow, I just can't put things together. I can't see beyond the outfit that they show in the shop/catalogue, even down to the shoes, I'd just buy whatever they had with the outfit in the shop and can't see past that. I don't know where I lost it all:(

Jacks_xxx

gs1967 wrote: »

Jacks and Meme, I love everything you've linked to, I think I'll be going to Next tomorrow, I just can't put things together. I can't see beyond the outfit that they show in the shop/catalogue, even down to the shoes, I'd just buy whatever they had with the outfit in the shop and can't see past that. I don't know where I lost it all:(

:wave: Next should put me on commission! I think it's partly a confidence thing and partly an "if you don't use it you lose it" type thing when you don't know what to wear.

But like with any "muscle" if you start exercising it again you can get it back.

You have to force yourself to put outfits together even if it's as simple as picking out a new top to go with some existing bottoms. In this respect dresses can be easier than separates because there are fewer thing to combine to make an outfit.

You're human, you have preferences so try lots of things on and you'll find you start liking some things and some combinations better than others.

Then you just have to have the courage of your own convictions and trust your choices.

Thinking " casually stylish" rather than just "casual" might work well for you because it conjures up a whole different picture from jeans and hoodies.

A useful exercise might be to come up with three or four words to embody the style you want then keep them in mind while you are looking.

Do keep us posted about how you get on.