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BR tomorrow morning - going crazy!!

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Morning all,

Need to vent, hope that is okay? Both OH and I are off to court for 9am tomorrow morning with 3 under 5s in tow on my OHs birthday! I have just completed the reasons for BR online (using the link phil sent - thank you) and then went to save and ka-boom, all was lost :mad: and 45 mins of trying to do this with Cbeebies on in the background has been wasted.

I have shouted at everyone already this morning and don't see the day getting any better (it is throwing it down so no chance of getting out).

All I want to do is cry. I am so nervous about tomorrow. What if they are horrible to us and say all the things I am already berating myself for (how did you let it get to this, why have children if you can't afford them, why get such a big mortgage....)

Although our house is in negative equity I still keep thinking that they are going to say we have to lose it and I know it is only bricks and mortar but really don't want that to happen.

I know we are better of than some and I should be glad of that but at the moment I feel like we are in some black hole with no end in sight.

Sorry to moan and don't feel like you have to respond, I just needed to get it off my chest.

Jedi x
Finally getting my life on track. Onwards and upwards.
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Comments

  • philnicandamy
    philnicandamy Posts: 15,685 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    jedi82 wrote: »
    Morning all,

    Need to vent, hope that is okay? Both OH and I are off to court for 9am tomorrow morning with 3 under 5s in tow on my OHs birthday! I have just completed the reasons for BR online (using the link phil sent - thank you) and then went to save and ka-boom, all was lost :mad: and 45 mins of trying to do this with Cbeebies on in the background has been wasted. Hmm sadly happens a lot thats why we always say to people SAVE OFTEN I know too late now...

    I have shouted at everyone already this morning and don't see the day getting any better (it is throwing it down so no chance of getting out). take a deep breath & try again..

    All I want to do is cry. I am so nervous about tomorrow. What if they are horrible to us and say all the things I am already berating myself for (how did you let it get to this, why have children if you can't afford them, why get such a big mortgage....) they wont...trust me all they'll ask IF you see a judge is have you spoken to cccs/cab etc

    Although our house is in negative equity I still keep thinking that they are going to say we have to lose it and I know it is only bricks and mortar but really don't want that to happen. it wont..

    I know we are better of than some and I should be glad of that but at the moment I feel like we are in some black hole with no end in sight. its natural to feel the way you do...we've all been through it BUT it WILLget better trust me

    Sorry to moan and don't feel like you have to respond, I just needed to get it off my chest.

    Jedi x

    dont apologise...if you need a moan thats what this place is here for...everyone understands...and i'll guarantee tomorrow you'll walk from the court afterwards thinking "huh..was that it?"
    We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will
  • Sunnylooloo
    Sunnylooloo Posts: 4,295 Forumite
    Ahhhhhh deep breath, have a cuppa............ and just be calm

    It is a horrible time, and you vent away and as much as you like.

    No one will judge you esp not about you beautiful children.

    The house - I know how you feel - but it is only bricks and mortar and you can make a home anyway - you will read some great threads from people in similar sitations to you and you will see they had the same feelings as you and then a few months on they have a new rented HOME and they are settled. Everyone still has wobbly moments but that is what we are here for.

    I can't really say much more but just keep calm and just think this time tomorow it will be over and you can get on living.

    Good luck and I wish there was more I could say to you.

    LL
    x
    The worst cliques are those which consist of one man ~ George Bernard Shaw
    Holiday Saving fund 2010 = £25.00 :DWeightLoss 2010 = +6lbs :(
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  • You will be ok. I was very very nervous before I did it three weeks ago but really its not that bad. Everyone on here told me as much before hand but it is true. everyone at court was polite friendly and professional. I had to see the judge but he was a nice understanding man and was quite sympathetic.
    I was worried sick beforehand but honestly its no where near as bad as you think. it will soon be over.
    Good luck.
  • We went BR 2 hours ago, I can assure you that you won't be judged and its nowhere as bad as you think! The staff were so friendly and understanding, no one will have a go at you, you'll be fine! I was panicking last night, and it turned out to be a panic about nothing. We sat in a small room with a very nice lady for 10 mins, went through the forms, we were even offered a smoke break while she went to see the judge!! Came back after a smoke and it was all done!! Best wishes and good luck! Geoff
  • sams247
    sams247 Posts: 1,362 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Homepage Hero Photogenic
    I went BR almost a year ago, and it is true what people are telling you, people in the courts have seen it all, they have nothing to gain by being mean. Everyone I met on my BR day was kind and supportive. I had to see the judge and he was very understanding. It was alot lot smoother than I had feared. I had two OR interviews (due to a mess up) the first was awful, but the second was fine and much as most people say it would be. In my case, and in the case of many BR people I can say the worst is over for you - the worry, the stress, the fighting against debt, people calling, threatening, the indecision, the late-but-still-awake nights. It's going to be closed for you now.

    You come away with your family, your children, a home wherever you make it, and a fresh start.

    Moan all you like, we've all been there, and trust that someone is listening and thinking - yeah, I felt like that too, and we got through.

    Let us know how you get on.
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          1. jedi82
            jedi82 Posts: 410 Forumite
            Thanks for the advice and reassurance :) I have calmed down a fair bit and managed to complete my forms and printed them out - well, printed out half until I ran out of paper and my ink cartridge died! So, after a trip to town I am back, soaking wet, but ready to tackle my OHs with him.

            I have seen so many posts with people saying how nice and straightforward everything is but you just can't help think that it is going to be different for you. Hopefully will be back on tomorrow and will say 'you told me so'

            Jedi x
            Finally getting my life on track. Onwards and upwards.
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          2. IF
            IF Posts: 34,349 Forumite
            10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
            Hello Jedi, Pleased your feeling a bit calmer. Filling in the forms was the hardest for me, so know how your feeling. Thinking of you both tomorrow and deep breath's.

            Best wishes
            If...x
            "If wishes were horses, then beggars would ride"
          3. confused76
            confused76 Posts: 12,680 Forumite
            Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
            Hi Jedi
            as everyone else has already said, tomorrow will be fine, you won't get told off and you'll be home before you know it.

            you are at the most stressful phase at the moment, just run with it, things WILL get better i promise

            good luck tomorrow, but you won't need it x
          4. Monkeyballs
            Monkeyballs Posts: 1,935 Forumite
            Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
            Just wanted to say, Good luck Jedi!

            You'll be ok. I know it's almost a day on since your post and you've obviously calmed down but the whole process happens over a very short period of time so you'll be in and out before you know it.

            They will look after you, they are nice and won't judge you.

            Again, good luck and feel free to vent anytime ;-)
          5. snoopy89
            snoopy89 Posts: 320 Forumite
            yes good luck jed and stop worring as there is nothing to worry about at all. i am nearly 10 months down the road, and i am still to find any problems, its been easy, just get a co-op account after court hearing, a cash minder account and that gives u internet banking, i pay all my direct debits that way. roll on for november and freedom. i have money in bank and no probs. so as i said best of luck to u all and roll on hopefully no sleepless nights and your family can rest and build a better life in the comeing years.:)
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