Knackered!!

biglass

Hi,all,suppose I'm looking for some reassurance that I'm not just pathetic-but does anyone else just feel exhausted a lot of the time?!:o
me and DH work our shifts round each other to avoid childcare issues,and I work 30 hrs ,mixing days and nights often in the same week, as does hubby-we have 3 kids,15,5 and 4yrs.I try to cook HM often ,(but not nearly as often as I should) and house is a constant tidying process...! I feel worried that my oldest DD won't do well in exams this year as I feel I'm not "there" for her enough(she's not the most motivated of kids) and I feel cr*p as I feel as if I don't spend enough time with wee ones too,and end up feeding them easy rubbish a lot(can empathise with Kiwichicks recent thread)
This sounds like a huge" feeling sorry for myself "thread,I know,but I think what is also an issue for us is that DH and I obviously have now different ideas re work.Basically I am trying to cut down our outgoings so that I can cut my work right down(would LOVE to be a SAHM) and would happily do without material stuff,but DH seems to be going the other way and wants cars ,motorbikes, hols abroad ,socialising,etc,etc and a chasm seems to be looming between us....I've tried to talk-he finds it impossible!!:mad:
There's no way we would split over this,but I just I am not in control and we have no structured family life. As I said,knackered all the time!!
Sorry about all this! Any advice gratefully received on how you guys all do it!!

Linda32

Well working shifts isn't easy for a start and young children are very hard work as well. SAHM have my full respect.

These obviously alot going on at the moment which leads to stress in all area's. I'm not surprised you feel sorry for yourself, and these nothing wrong with that either.

Regarding house work, I do just one job aday lets say if these ironing to do then thats the job for that day.

Cleaning, I do one room a day and once done, thats it. Luckly I can ignore things that I know need doing.

Hope this helps and if I think of anything else, I'll pop back

NastyMatt

I am not going to try and reply for the relationship/emotional party of this thread but stick to some suggestions to help with feeling tired.

Two things:
Diet. By that I mean what you eat and drink - not "try to lose weight".

Sleep. Seems obvious.

Try eating 6 times a day but small portions (no bigger than your fist). This will help with a slow release of sugars into the blood stream and stop highs and lows.. lows make you feel more tired than you are. Drink cold water.. and lots of it.

Sleep at least 8 hours a day. Your body can only repair itelf when you are sleeping. So even if you are not tired your body will need it. Quality of sleep is important.. when feeling tired going to the gym/for a run etc does not seem like the best option but you will sleep like a baby the moment your head hits the pillow.

Goods luck.

Penny_Watcher

Hi biglass,

Have you had your iron levels checked. I used to feel just the way you do. I was turned away from blood donors a couple of times for low iron levels so I went to the doctors who sent me for a proper blood test. Low and behold - very low haemoglobin.

It was easily sorted by taking some over the counter ferrous sulphate tablets. I also boost my iron levels by eating dried apricots and good dark chocolate (purely for medicinal purposes of course ) Not offering medical advice here of course, just recounting what worked for me.

As soon as you get your energy levels back things start to look so much better. Best of luck hun (((hugs)))

dronid

I think many people these days feel pretty exhausted, not that I'm implying that's fine. The two of us work full time and feel pretty knackered a lot - and we don't have children!

I can second NastyMatt in the ideas - sleep, quality of food and would also add that you need to make some time for yourself (or the two of you). Shift work can really play havoc with communication! Also your OH is keen on "cars, motorbikes, hols abroad" which is fine but I have to ask if he inputs on the housework etc. Does he feel knackered? Needless to say doing those luxury boy toy things can tend to be a little difficult with children (motorbike with a 4yo pillion passenger in particular!)

Really the main thing you have to do is look after yourself. That will put you in a position to take care of the kids and house. Big Huggs :grouphug:

MATH

I was in Asda the other Saturday, I never usually go in at the weekend because being a SAHD I have the luxury of shopping early on a Monday morning when the store is empty. My heart really went out to all the parents who both obviously work having to shop on a Saturday when the store is madness and having to drag their kidz around with them. Throw in some basic gardening and home maintenance and even the most basic of laundry/housework and their weekend is gone. What time do they get off?

Mrs MATH and me are always busy. She works fulltime and runs a business part-time, I work part-time and SAHD full-time, throw in church and community commitments and 4 aged/ill parents and the kidz needs and groups and we are knackered too. I don't know how we would survive if we both had full-time work on top also.

I really don't think both parents working full time works for the kidz or the parents. I cannot understand those who choose to do it and I feel sorry for those who have no choice but to do it.

stressedoutmumof1

My hubbie works full-time, he leaves the house about 8.00am and returns about 7.00pm. I work from 9.00am - 3.00pm with no breaks, and yes it is a mad rush doing the school run, I have to peddle like fury on my bike

I wake up (via the alarm) at about 5.30am, put washing in the machine, stick the breadmaker on, iron the clothes for that morning, make packed lunches for everyone, try and have a bit of a tidy up, get myself and daughter ready, leave for school, cycle to work, work till 3.00pm, cycle back to the school, pick up daughter, walk home, make dinner, do some cleaning and tidying, it's a never ending circle and my house is such a tip all the time :mad:

Hubbie doesn't really help much, but then he's working longer hours than me, he only really helps if I have a complete hissy fit

Come about 9.00pm I am absolutely knackered, in fact as I type this (at work ) my eyes feel really droopy, and I really could fall asleep (if if weren't for the huge mug of coffee I'm drinking)

I totally agree with you about the "control" thing - I don't think I feel in control of anything in my life at the mo. But then maybe I'm just having a bad day :rolleyes:

bubblebathgirl

:grouphug: hi big lass,
i have no practical support to offer just wanted to say be kind to your self (you sound to be doing a grand job).Would batch cooking help - ? cooking in big batches and then freezing them in portions for the kids ?

newlywed

Have you checked flylady.net?

She suggests doing a few small 15 minute jobs instead of trying to tackle too much at once.

newlywed

I try and do the lunches while I'm cooking tea in the evening - eg if having pasta then I do extra for lunch. Or make soup while cooking other stuff, or else just make a sarnie ready in the fridge.

Not sure if that would help - with me, it's the early mornings that I find most tiring so doing a batch of ironing and stuff one evening is easier for me to cope with.

tankgirl1

hi

i dont really have any advice, other than perhaps go and see your doc. i have the same problem, and am currently waiting on a load of blood tests......

big hug (((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))

tg x