Hill's Cream Collection biscuits

Becles

I bought a pack of Hill's Cream Collection in Home Bargains. I was pleased to see it included bourbons, custard creams and a digestive cream biscuit which I was keen to try as I'm used to the digestive being in the large diamater biscuit category rather than a cream.

The custard creams were fine and I had no problem with those.

I was disgusted with the bourbons. Everyone knows the bourbon constant is 61x30mm with 10 regulation holes per side. These bourbons were 45x40mm with only 8 holes per side. Nothing has reassured me more than knowing that like death and taxes, you can be certain of getting the correct sized bourbon. I felt violated by these bourbon imposters.

Then I opened the digestive cream in keen anticipation and became seriously annoyed. With a digestive, you know you are going to get a ear of wheat imprint on the biscuit which, like bourbon, is very reassuring. I was kind of expecting the creams to have a similar pattern or at least a plain but slightly uneven finish to signify the high wheat content. I was shocked and horrified to discover they were patterned with the baroque embossing that normally adorns a custard cream. The baroque embossing singles out the custard cream as the sophisticated biscuit in the cream category and it's a shame that other lesser known creams are trying to live up to it's fine reputation by stealing it's identity.

I shall not be buying Hill's Cream Collection again due to the sheer mental distress I've suffered, and I'm looking to claim compensation from them for the pain and suffering caused by the violation of biscuit standards.

preable

hahaha best rant ever

hollydays

I am amazed it was Home Bargains,are you sure it wasn't Tesco?
Can't we just pretend it was Tesco?

thistledome

Becles wrote: »

.....and a digestive cream biscuit which I was keen to try as I'm used to the digestive being in the large diamater biscuit category rather than a cream.

Worth reading just for that. :T

hollydays

how do you feel about..ginger nuts..?

Widelats

What do you expect for 29p per pack.

trumpton

Are these the Hill's biscuits that used to be 5p a packet in Heron Frozen Foods? I see you are a connoisseur of fine baking.

I hope your next thread will address the more pressing issue of the day, to wit: Penguin biscuits and their masquerading as a luxury snack when they are, in fact, nothing but a glorified bourbon.

hollydays

trumpton wrote: »

Are these the Hill's biscuits that used to be 5p a packet in Heron Frozen Foods? I see you are a connoisseur of fine baking.

I hope your next thread will address the more pressing issue of the day, to wit: Penguin biscuits and their masquerading as a luxury snack when they are, in fact, nothing but a glorified bourbon.

Next you will be suggesting that Ferrerro Roche are not favoured by royalty and are purely for philistines/Kerry Katona ..ambassadeur...

pinkduvetdiva

I feel your pain, OP. Maybe you should go on the Jeremy Kyle Show for some counselling. :rotfl:

FOURCANDLES_2

Good post, but stop eating biscuits they will make you fat bite on a fresh carrot instead.

peachyprice

I thought the lemon jammy dodgers were pushing the boundaries, but embelished diggies and almost square bourbons is simply outrageous.