Merging money

pollyanna24

Ooh er, I've just kinda convinced my bf to merge our money together in one account. This is in readiness for having a kid in the next two years and the fact I won't have much income.

Don't get me wrong, we work very well together. He's always given me half his income for mortgage and bills which we stick in a joint account and he could always what the hell he wanted with the other half.

But now (for some reason, not sure why), I think it would make sense for me to have complete control over his money (oops, there's the reason).

I've convinced him by saying if he gives me all his wages, he never has to worry about mobile phone bills, petrol, his cc ever again (unless he runs it up again, then he's in big trouble). :mad: I'll give him so much out of it (mutual decision as to how much) to spend on himself.

I'm hoping I doing the right thing. I don't want to turn in a nagging woman, saying "You're spending too much on petrol" etc. etc. Before if he blew his money on a £100 belt, I didn't care as long as I had the bills money.

What do other couples do? Btw we've been together over 7 years and lived together for 6 of them, so it's probably long overdue!

BlondeHeadOn

ooh, sounds scary! We just have a joint account for all joint bills - mortgage, food, bills, insurance, holidays etc. - and both pay £800 each a month into that. I manage this account, and sort out all food bills and day-to-day payments etc., the rest goes out by DD. Any money left over in this account at the end of the month I use to pay extra on the mortgage or put away towards the next holiday (depending on how I'm feeling!)

Then all our other money is ours - we each have a separate account for our respective salaries - and anything we want to buy/save/squander is our own affair. I like this as it means neither of us has to justify to the other any purchases we make, or feel guilty about spending 'joint' money.

This works for us, but may not be so good for other couples who don't earn roughly equivalent amounts....

lazy&indebt

I could never see myself sharing an account with anyone!

maryjane01

I am facing this hurdle at the moment, just got married not even 2 weeks ago and getting a mortgage hopefully in one week! OH is hopeless with money and when we met had over £10,000 debt. Since we met I have helped him get it down (although with the mortgage and joint finances I will be helping him pay the last few thousand off). He is reluctant for me to take over our finances and him loose control, but I have told him in no uncertain terms this is an issue that is pretty much boderline non negotiable as I know how cr*p with money he is, and when I am at the age of retirement I want our home paid off, and hopefully a pension saved. His parents are a prime example of what I don't want to end up like. They told us they couldn't afford to give us a wedding present and have no money saved and should be retiring but can't. I think he learnt his money management skills from them, which was basically spend everything you have and then some more and have a house full of expensive 'stuff' which wouldn't be worth that much if you tried to ebay it. I just have to be a little patient as he comes round, which I know he will. He knows I am a lot better with money than him.

pounds_and_pensive

I've shared an account with my husband in the past, and would sooner share a pit with a skunk who lived on curried baked beans and garlic than do it again. The whole idea stank.

Um... good luck though

maryjane01

BTW our plan is a joint account which our salary goes into for all essentials including mortgage, transport, contact lenses, savings etc. and a seperate current account each for a certain amount of play money which is for going out, buying lunch if too lazy to pack it at home, clothes, haircuts etc. If he wants expensive new clothes he has to curb going out or vice versa (me too!). We both have complete control over how we each use our play money.

mrs_mug_2

We share everything. We do have our own accounts but they are used for money that we want put aside (to pay the cc bill etc). We've been together for 4 and a bit years and we've pretty much always had a joint account (we moved in together after less than 6 months).

He earns it, I spend it. Of course now it is spent on bills and debts rather than anything else.

pollyanna24

Thanks guys. It is a bit scary, but he's got a few debts which I want rid of and he's doing nowt, so if I take it over, even though effectively I am paying some of them, at least they will be gone and we can concentrate on mortgage.

We've had a joint account for donkeys. I have decided to give us £400 each to do what we want with. Seeing as he doesn't have to pay petrol, car insurance, phone bill, car tax, bike tax any more, this should be a fortune to spend in the pub!

PS. We both earn exactly the same at the moment, but I started the whole merging money due to the fact that when I get preggers, I won't be earning.

yung

I look after all the main finance . 1 joint account and seperate single account and all saving in my name :j

MoneyMagnet

Sounds rather scary to me! OH & I live together & have a joint mortgage, and are thinking of getting a joint account for shared expenses (currently he pays for utilities etc, and I pay him my share), but other than that, we have our own accounts. He is very good with money, and I am too these days since having my LBM (if anything I'm much tighter than him now lol!), so it's not as if either of us is irresponsible. I also like managing my own finances and not having to answer to anyone, so long as I pay my way with regard to our shared expenses & financial goals, and he probably feels the same way. We're 100% committed to each other, but still like to keep some financial independence.

So sharing everything wouldn't work for us, but that's just a personal preference - I can see how it might work for others.

pollyanna24 wrote:

he's got a few debts which I want rid of and he's doing nowt,

Is he committed to not running up any more debt? I'd be wary of helping him out if not :undecided

Good luck!

lynzpower

Weve considered it, but now decided against it!

We have a shared account for the bills ( well its not shared, Its mine, he pays into it, neither of is have a card for it its just for standing orders)

we have our own accounts for our fun money & paying our respective debts out of.

It works for us