how do you and your partner budget?

garcianicole

weve been married 3 yrs and have always had seperate accounts, i paid my share of the bills and what was left was basically mine
i assumed my husbands wages worked out the same way, he paid his agreed bills and anything left over was his - he just went halves on holidays, xmas, housey bits etc
we never really discussed a proper plan when we first moved in together, and i now realise my husband got into debt because his outgoings were much more than his income
it never occured to him to sit down d explain the situation and to sugest i perhaps needed to contribute more, he just tried to muddle through - missing payments here and there, most probably resenting me although i totally oblivious to his spiralling debt until bailif came round and electric was cut off!
any way now its in the open, we're trying to work through it together and have decided to get a joint account - but im used to having my own bank account and income for so long just dont understand how it will work. do most couples consider their income as "joint" do you pay equal shares in the bills, how do you distribute anthing left over. was thinking of taking bit each to see us through the week and anything over was to be considered joint kitty money .. would love to hear how everyone else budgets

Nottoobadyet

heya - I have a set up similar to yours, though communication is very necessary! When my OH was studying I put in more to cover the difference etc.

Be aware that opening a joint bank account may not be the best option as it will tie your credit file to his, and if he has defaults and late payments it will damage your ability to get credit.

Jedilibrarian

hi there
We have seperate accounts but all joint bills (rent, CT, electric etc) come from my account and my OH pays me lump sum once a month to cover his share. I pay 60%, he pays 40% since I earn a bit more. In theory this way we both have similar amounts of our 'own' money to pay our own bills (mobiles, CCs, charities etc) and for fun. For any households buys we go halfers. We buy our own food.
HTH
JL

Tixy

Hi

I think a good way is to have seperate accounts that your wages go into and then a joint bills account that you each pay a fixed amount in (not the same amount each in your case) but whatever figure/ratio you decide between you to make up all the household bills and a small surplus.
That way you still have your own account with some privacy over what you spend etc.

As someone else has said, if he has financial difficulties and if you don't already have any joint financial products then you don't want to become financially associated just for a joint account so I would still have the bills account but have it just in your name.
If you already have a joint mortgage then it won't make much difference.

zcrat41

Hi,

I don't know the inns and outs of joint accounts linking your credit file I'm afraid.

OH and I are a bit sad and have talked about what we would do with our money if (hopefully when!) we get married. We'd link everything basically. (He earns a lot more than me) But then I'm fully aware I'll be marrying a man who won't ever go to a shop if he can help it so I'll probably end up buying his clothes and stuff. (He's a country bumpkin)

I reckon every couple is different and what works for one won't work for another. What is key is communication and finding a system that works for you

Wee_Jo

Hiya! :hello:

The way we work it is that we have separate bank accounts to receive our salaries into and then we pay equal shares of the mortgage (which is joint), council tax, gas, electric, insurance, etc. We also go halfers on groceries and anything that needs to be bought for the house and holidays, presents for family, etc. We have a joint credit card which we both pay off and then we each of have credit cards that we are responsible for on our own.

The rest of our money we keep separately but we communicate a lot on what we’re spending, competing on NSDs, etc! My hubby is very good with his money and I am (historically!) really rubbish, but just last week he told me that I had overtaken him on the “good with money” front and it was probably the best compliment I have received ever! :j I guess just because I have always thought of money as one of my biggest weaknesses!

So that’s the way we do it, it works for us, but everybody’s different.

Jo

Malky

We go 50-50 on everything. We have both joint and separate accounts.
The joint account is where both our wages get paid into and where the mortgage, bills, direct debits, groceries etc get paid out of.
Our own personal accounts get money transferred into them every month from the joint account for our own 'spending money'.

mummyroysof3

hi, my hubby goes out to work and i stay home and look after the kids. his wages, tax credits and cb all go into a joint account all bills get paid by dd from there then i work out whats left per week and we try our best to spend less than that lol i really would like to be able to save some money out of it every month but on paper we should have some left but in reality we dont, must work harder on that lol

garcianicole

thanks everyone, some good ideas there
im thinking perhaps a joint mortgage, bills, expenses account would be the way to go
then agree on an amt to put away for savings and holidays and anything left over is our own
just so hard to work out who pays how much, he earns over twice the amt i do - yet somehow struggled to pay his share of the bills before getting into debt

Tixy

Garcianicole - have you worked out what he was spending his money on? does he have a lot more debts than you? are these things he has run up recently or debts he had before you lived together.

I would suggest maybe you both write out detailed income & expenditure accounts seperately for your own personal needs (clothes, haircuts, mobiles, entertainment, personal debt repayments etc) and then work out a household expenditure list. When you look at all 3 together you should hopefully be able to decide what feels right for both of you.

If he doesn't have a lot of debts could it be just that he is overspending generally and buying things he cannot afford? If this is the case can you get him reduce these costs, perhaps suggest he keeps a spending diary for a couple of months to see where it all goes.

mummyroysof3 - it sounds like a spending diary would be useful for you as well so you can find out where that 'on paper' suplus is going.

penelopedee_2

All the bills and groceries come out of my account and when he's working DH pays me a certain amout each week to cover his share. As for fun spends - there's not a lot left at the moment but we keep the rest of our money is our own accounts to save or spend as we wish.

I'm a bit of a control freak and need to know everything is being paid which is why the bills come out of my account. We do share what we have spare as over the years it goes back and forth as to who is earning or not. We also make joint decisions about what we spend on bigger things too.

I should also add, our emergency savings / mot fund / holiday / christmas etc all gets counted as bills in our house as we try and put money away each month for them.