It's over... now what?

paddy's_mum

Being awol until 7 the next morning is not "a bit late" :eek:

Pee

I have to say I trust my boyfriend entirely and wouldn't be worried about him getting in at 7 am, provided this was either arranged beforehand or he called me at the time I would expect him home to say he was going on to a party whatever and all was well, otherwise by 7 am I'd be imagining the worst.

Still, I don't think that is worth throwing a relationship in over, no matter how worried she was, if it was the first time.

ZootHornRollo

Pee wrote: »

I think you were having a good deal living with your girlfriend.

Explain?

On the other hand, it sounds like you wanted to go out more and as though the relationship wasn't really working out for you.

You picked that up from what? You are jumping to conclusions with very little to base them on.

Moreover if I was your girlfriend, I'd be having my doubts about your ability to support me and a family should we choose to go down that route. (Only you know whether these are issues for you and her.)

irrelevant

Agree living with my parents wouldn't be an option. Have you considered a house share? One option might be to be a lodger, freeing up some money for a better social life, opportunity to meet other women etc and you can then see how you feel about your girfriend?

Is living in the caravan an option?

Try putting an SOA on the debt free wannabe board as they will give you lots of helpful advice.

House share might be an option but we have two dogs and need to work out what happens to them - she keeps them/i keep them/one each. I expect dogs would make renting a pain. need to see how things work out.

ZootHornRollo

Pee wrote: »

I have to say I trust my boyfriend entirely and wouldn't be worried about him getting in at 7 am, provided this was either arranged beforehand or he called me at the time I would expect him home to say he was going on to a party whatever and all was well, otherwise by 7 am I'd be imagining the worst.

Still, I don't think that is worth throwing a relationship in over, no matter how worried she was, if it was the first time.

it was a once off. like i said, we only go out 3 or 4 times a year. most of the time are home by 1. Once a year we have an all dayer (as it was this time) and stay out later, normally home around 4am. not defending it.

ZootHornRollo

PicnicBasket wrote: »

I don't understand how you work out that she won't be any worse off but you will be, unless she was financing a much larger part of your joint lifestyle...

You'll survive, but you might have to sell the caravan. Camping isn't the same on your own anyway. It may take time but there are plenty of tips on here about how to build up your financial security from scratch.

It sounds like she knows what she wants, but if you really want to salvage the relationship for its own sake, some honest talking and more importantly, listening is in order. Good luck.

see arianas post below yours

Pee

It is very difficult to rent with dogs. That was why I ended up buying a house as anywhere that would rent with dogs was a state. I did have a lodger with a dog, but I think that is fairly unusual.

Pee

I think you had a good deal because whilst your money was going on treats and food and debts, her's was paying the basics.

clairetelche1

Pee wrote: »

I think you had a good deal because whilst your money was going on treats and food and debts, her's was paying the basics.

If it worked for them then I can't see a problem - I'd love to just pay the bills then leave the OH to sort everything lse - it'd be great! Might suggest it...

ZootHornRollo

It is very difficult to rent with dogs. That was why I ended up buying a house as anywhere that would rent with dogs was a state. I did have a lodger with a dog, but I think that is fairly unusual.

Thats what i figured. Cheers

ZootHornRollo

clairetelche1 wrote: »

If it worked for them then I can't see a problem - I'd love to just pay the bills then leave the OH to sort everything lse - it'd be great! Might suggest it...

I don't see what difference it makes if everyone ends up paying their share. It worked fine for us.