Partner just left out of the blue.

Nicklt

Partner has just left me out of the blue, she just said she didnt love me anymore. I tried to get her to stay and talk to me but she said she has made her mind up and there is nothing i can do.

I'm completely lost now, we recently moved to the area we live and i have no friends so i feel completely alone.

Part of me thinks she will come back, but the way she was speaking it doesn't sound like it.

I never cry, but i did today loads. I love her and really didn't want her to go. She has taken our 2 year old daughter and i dont want to just see her at the weekends.

Part of me is also a bit angry, i have done everything possible to make her happy. I work, she doesn't, i provide everything. I got us a nice place to live, she never goes without and spoil her loads. I told her i loved her everyday.

If she doesn't come back i want us to at least be civil with each other, problem is she is the type of person that wont be civil.

I also know she wont be able to cope with our daughter on her own, she struggle with her on the one day in the week when she is not at nursery, i would have my daughter live with me but i have to work everyday.

I don't mean to bad mouth her but like i said im a bit angry.

I feel really alone, i have no one to talk to and im here surrounded by all her stuff and my daughters toys and it's making it worse.

Britwife

Maybe try and give her some space and let her call you to see what happens. Most importantly, make some kind of arrangement to see your daughter. You want to make sure you do everything you can to see your daughter.

Just don't discuss you and your partner right now, only your daughter. I hope things work out for you.

xmaslolly76

Hugs OP what an awfull thing to have happen. I dont know what to say to you other than wallow in it for a while you are going to need to get angry and cry your going through a grieving process and that is never easy. Maybe in your angry stages bag everything of hers up so you dont have to look at it constantly. It will get easier and you will get everything sorted out one way or another

LillythePink

Aww - ((Hugs)) for you

I'm sure she will talk to you in time, maybe she felt a bit smothered and overwhelmed by everything being a "kept" woman etc and just wanted to find her identity again.

How was your relationship before this - you say that you told her you loved her every day - but did she say it back to you?

I know that when I was unhappy in my previous marriage and just before the end, I wasn't saying it to him anymore as I didn't feel it and just couldn't say it

But you do need to try and communicate with her for your daughters sake

C_Mababejive

I know its hard but dont do anything just yet.
Let the dust settle and take stock of the situation.

Nicklt

She always said i love you back, but she said she said it because she thought it might make her love me.

I thought the relationship was going well, we didnt argue very often, about average. We has a laugh and did stuff together.

She did get mood swings a bit (maybe this was a sign) she also gets stressed very easily and can get quite spiteful.

About 80% of the time things where good, but maybe she saw different. Im just lost as what to do now.

BitterAndTwisted

If she doesn't have a job and therefore not much money of her own where do you think she has gone to?

Counting_Pennies_2

You say she didn't work, yet your two year old went to nursery 4 days a week.

I wonder if she was suffering from postnatal depression, that went undiagnosed. Do you think she has been calling out for help, but couldn't communicate it?

How did the discussion go when she spoke about the need for nursery?

If you can try to see if you can go to counselling together. You can go privately, it doesn't need to be relate.

http://wam.bacp.co.uk/wam/SeekTherapist.exe?NEWSEARCH

Nicklt

Counting_Pennies wrote: »

You say she didn't work, yet your two year old went to nursery 4 days a week.

I wonder if she was suffering from postnatal depression, that went undiagnosed. Do you think she has been calling out for help, but couldn't communicate it?

How did the discussion go when she spoke about the need for nursery?

If you can try to see if you can go to counselling together. You can go privately, it doesn't need to be relate.

http://wam.bacp.co.uk/wam/SeekTherapist.exe?NEWSEARCH

we pay for her to go nursery, she goes to college. I dont know what she is going to do, she had gone to her moms atm. And that is only a one bedroom place. She thinks that the council will just give her somewhere to live etc. But tbh without the income from me she has nothing.

chloe99_2

I dont mean to be unkind, but if someone is unhappy enough in a relationship, then they wouldnt normally give two hoots about the money

Nicklt

chloe99 wrote: »

I dont mean to be unkind, but if someone is unhappy enough in a relationship, then they wouldnt normally give two hoots about the money

thats a fair comment, but i dont want my daughter to go without. She doesnt work and has no real means of providing for our daughter, i love her lots and we have achieved so much and it would be gutting to let it all go.