OH 24K debt...

mark_steps

Just found out that whilst i was aware we were in no debt, we are in fact in 24K of debt. Credit cards, store cards, numerous bank accounts in overdrafts...the list goes on and on...im devastated but to keep her morale up im like we will deal with it together...

We have a mortgage with literally 3 grand paid off (only got about 3years ago.)

I have just purchased a new car on Hp not so long ago as we were comfortable..or so i thought.

Is a consolodation loan my only hope and who do i turn to? Will they give me 24k Unsecured or does it need to be secured against my property..

Im stressing as i dont know how to get outta this mess

kazwookie

Oh dear, is there anything that this 24K bought that can be sold to recoup some of the money?

You need to do a SOA, and put it up, cuts if any can be made, plus what cards and the interest %, repayments amounts etc.

Others will be along shortly.

KingElvis

Nothing is impossible to deal with, take heart

I'm sure once you've put up your details, the advice will be there.

Good luck.

mark_steps

Thank-you. I shall get it done tonight or tomorrow..couldnt concentrate at work its driving me potty knowing all this debt

Tixy

With that amount of debt it might be hard to get a consolidation loan - would depend on whose name the debts are in and how much you both earn and what your credit historys are like etc. But it may not be the best option anyway.
And if you haven't had your house/mortgage long you may struggle to get a secured loan (unless you had a large deposit so have a lot of equity).

Instead you need to find out exactly what you owe to who and the APRs and limits etc and write out a full statement of affairs using this link - http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html. If you post the results on here we can talk you through the different ways to deal with it, and suggest how to free up money.

Only after you have seen your full financial position in writing can you make an informed decision as to what is do-able and what is right for you.

Must have been a shock for you though, especially as presumably most of this has been run up in the last 3years or it would have shown up on the mortgage applications - hopefully from now you can both take care of finances together and find a way out of this.

Firewalker

Mark, the financial options are the easy ones to cope with - and I do realise that at the moment these are the ones you worry about most. Your relationship with OH is the thing to worry about. You need to talk and you need to re-build some kind of trust - without this your life together will soon be impossible.

Taka care, 'keep calm and carry on'.

Firewalker

debtdesperado

I agree with Firewalker - it sounds like the first thing is to get to the bottom of why your OH has run that debt up... and why she didn't feel that she could tell you before?

What was she spending on - was the debt something that has been slowly, gradually run up over a number of years (did she have any debt when you bought the house together?) or has she blasted through £24k in the 3 years since? Did it get spent on a few big, necessary things (such as a car or furniture) or has she spent it by buying lots of small but expensive things? The latter is a warning flag as it does suggest that she's unhappy and is constantly treating herself to make her feel better (don't ask me, with £42k of debt at my LBM, how I know this :-). That unhappiness may be nothing to do with you (and you sound very supportive), but she needs to work out what has made her spend like that.

In a funny way the actual debt is the easy bit to deal with - you pull in your belts, consolidate here and there, sell some stuff, trim your outgoings, all of that, but the hard bit is getting to the bottom (without it descending into accusations and blame) of why she has deliberately run her financial affairs into such chaos.

You don't say whether you are married and you sound like you are ready to help her, but I'm not sure that rushing to get a consolidation loan (in both your names? Secured against the house?) is really the right first step. She has got to get on board and that means letting her work out the best way to get out of it (in consultation with you, of course!). Rescuing her might not really let her learn to take responsibility as an equal partner for your team finances?

Whatever you decide, good luck.

Happytogetdebtfree

Hi and well done for posting, again i agree with firewalker sounds like you need to discuss whats the cash has been spent on.... consolidation is not the way forward, is she paying the payments, could she get 0% credit cards etc etc...... once you can post an soa and we can see whats what you will need oh's help with this honesty is the best policy good luck xx

HRV

I agree with the advice so far, however please be careful, don't take a loan to cover this in your name only- make sure it's in joint names.

Your situation sounds rather similar to my OH and his ex wife. She just kept spending and whilst it wasn't a total suprise to him the total amout of debt was. He consolidated the credit cards etc. in his name as she want working many hours coz of the kids. She had an affair and left with the kids and he was left with 50k + of debt- resulting in bankrupcy.

Don't mean to scare you but just b e careful about taking it all on you shoulders- you need to tackle it together and she must take some responsibility for it.

RAS

HRV wrote: »

I agree with the advice so far, however please be careful, don't take a loan to cover this in your name only- make sure it's in joint names.

Please do not take out further credit to clear debt.

If you were unaware of the problem, I assume that most of the debt apart from the car is in your partner's name? It is important that that situation remains.

Do not take out loans in your name or in joint names. You are jointly and severally liable for joint debt, whcih means creditors can come after you for the whole sum, not half of it.

Moneytroubles_2

Hiya, just wanted to welcome you to the board. You situation sounds very similar to mine, we got a mortgage approx 3 years ago so nothing noticeable paid off yet and we also had around £24k in debt - maybe a little bit less, and honestly just wanted to hide in my house when I realised, I felt the whole world was crashing around me, but i found this site and it has saved my life! I got cracking on the debt busting, listening to the advice of others and slowly but surely the debt is coming down.

Good luck with your journey and keep posting X