Need to Vent!!!

mellymeep

Oh I sympathise with you completely OP!!! Although I don't have much of a good relationship with the in-laws to be, MIL2B makes it plainly obvious that she's not happy I'm taking her boy away... even when we were first together she would whinge to him that I was distracting him whilst he was at uni (he graduated with a first class degree so that shut her up a bit!!) I desperately want to just get on with her, and our relationship has improved a lot since we announced we were getting married but she's already turned her nose up at the fact we're having a registry office just like you, and has invited all of my OHs cousins to the ceremony when I had planned to just have very close family as I have a lot of cousins as well and if I invite one the guest list would just keep going up and up.

As everyone else has said we need to stand strong and let everyone know that its our day and not theirs!!

(although I do love the S&M wedding suggestion, might ask MIL2B if she suits leather haha!!)

kittendothroar

Just ignore them, I have taken on the mantra that I won't be able to please everybody, so they can like it or lump it!! Make sure you have your day exactly how you want with the people you want. My mum still has regrets over her wedding 30 years on as her family kept interfering.

leeb2b

Hi bride2b2012,

Weddings seem to bring the worst out in people!!!!!!!!
Frannyann loving the fingers in ears!!!!

My SIL (OH sister) got married back in 2007, she was lucky because her H2B's parents have their own business, so paid for majority of their wedding, ie venue the biggest bulk! and her divorced parents with their new partners paid for things like, wedding car, and wedding rings!!! But the downside is my MIL invited her new husbands family the wedding/wedding breakfast, because she automatically thought she had a say!!

We are paying for our wedding ourselves, so we on a tight budget, and in-laws will not be having input in our day!! WE never asked them for help, but when we told them back in September we had set a date for 2011, they said they couldnt afford to help us!!! makes no difference to me, as my mum is on her own now as my dad died 6yrs ago! But it upset my OH as we hadnt even mentioned anything about money, just wanted them to be happy we had set a date finally (been together for 8yrs and engaged for 5yrs).

So i know how you feel, weddings cause so much stress, has crossed my mind that OH, myself, our children and my mum and sister !!!!!! !!!!!! off abroad somewhere and get married!! xx :mad:

louisecat

Sorry to hear about that, interfering is such a pain! Not only that but because you want to get on with the MIL2B, you can't tell her where to stick it either good to know that your H2B is on your side though, makes it much easier to stand by what you want.

jenhug

I'm more intrigued about the tacky wedding car!

dawnebabe

Don't you just hate people who think that they a right to tell you how to have your wedding?!

Thankfully my MIL has been very quiet about the wedding plans, however, I think it's because when our son was born she interfered something terrible, tried to tell me everything I was doing was wrong & we did have a bit of a strained time of it, however, I told her in no uncertain terms that it was my baby & things would be done my way (having already had a child!)... he's now a very healthy & wonderful 5 year old!

One of my SIL2b's however, is most put out that I don't want very small children there, as her daughter has not long had a baby. She was most put out when I told her that the baby would not be invited.... as a result has not spoken to me since, been a few months now.... but.... hey, ho, it's my & OH's wedding & it's going to be just how we want it! If she doesn't like this, she doesn't have to come!

I would ignore everything that is said & as other's here have said, if your MIL doesn't like it, tough!!

fitshase

Tell them numbers are limited and if they want the great long lost aunty and their cat to attend, you are happy for MIL2B to forego their invite to the wedding in favour of said aunty ;-)

Stick to your guns - it's your day not theirs.

samidevils

Know how you feel.

I've had family saying "you can't sit him with him" or " she'll be better sat with him".

In the end I have given in to some things which is annoying! My advice just do what YOU want. It's YOUR wedding too!!

Gemmzie

kittendothroar wrote: »

Just ignore them, I have taken on the mantra that I won't be able to please everybody, so they can like it or lump it!! Make sure you have your day exactly how you want with the people you want. My mum still has regrets over her wedding 30 years on as her family kept interfering.

My mum is exactly the same, the cake was wrong, the car was wrong. Even the bridesmaids she wasn't happy with. I really don't want that and since OH and I are paying for 80% of the costs - we're doing things how we want.

greenmoneysaver_2

I have gone for the approach of telling "nuffing to no-one"!

They have invites and that is it. It hasn't stopped the critiques, but luckily MIL has new grandchild with DIL to pick at. . . "I don't mean to interfere - WELL DON'T"