helppppppppp!!

immoral_angeluk

Benefits:
How old are your children? If under 10 you need to go and claim income support ASAPor if you intend to look for work income based jobseekers allowance. This will entitle you to full council tax benefit, full child tax credit plus free prescriptions and the like. After 13 weeks you will also be able to claim help with your mortgage interest payments.
You can claim income support/jobseekers from the jobcentre but be aware if you were previously claiming working tax credit there is a 4 week run on so you can't claim for 4 weeks. You will need to call up their helpline (0845 0556688 I think) and they will go through the claim on the phone and arrange an interview at your local jobcentre to finalise the claim. Expect it to take about 3-4 weeks to go through though. In the meantime you should put in claims for child tax credit and council tax benefit (from your local council) rather than waiting on the jobcentre to do it.
If you're currently claiming any benefits jointly you need to call them and tell them ASAP as you may end up with an overpayment of working tax credit. You will need to do new sole claims. With tax credits they can do this at the same time as closing the joint claim.

Housing:
As I said after 13 weeks on either income support or income based jobseekers allowance then you will get help with the mortgage interest payments so if you can change the mortgage to interest only for a while it will cover your payment.
Can you afford to live in the house with a mortgage long term? Who's name are the deeds in? Is it a joint mortgage?Is there any equity? Are you married? Either way you will need to see a solicitor to deal with what happens to the house and even if it is in only one name the other party may be entitled to a share of it through beneficial interest. If you are on benefits you will get full legal aid towards it and any divorce proceedings. Depending on the circumstances you may be able to get a solicitor to get maintenance for you to help with the mortgage payment from him.

Children:
Are they his? Does he have parental responsibility? If so he is liable for child maintenance up until their 16th (or 19th if in full time education) birthday. I strongly recommend not dealing with him directly and going straight through the CSA to save future disagreements. Check out the CMoptions website as they have a calculator on there to work out how much he will be liable for. Have you discussed access?

Debt:
You will be liable for any joint debts or where you are a guarantor, so if he defaults they will be able to come after you for the whole amount. If you have any debt issues (joint, sole or whatever) you should get advice as to what your options are, through CAB, national debtline or CCCS. If you are married any joint debts should be dealt with in the divorce and you may be able to get a consent order to remove your liability for any joint debts that he has taken on.
I would recommend contacting your creditors ASAP and explaining the circumstances. If you are honest with them from the start then generally they are *usually* willing to help. Failing that go to your local CAB and ask to see a debt advisor who will be able to go through your options will you.

Other:
I would recommend speaking to someone, whether it be relate, your doctor/health visitor or you could even have a look for local divorce/seperation groups to get some emotional support and assistance. You may also want to contact your children's school to warn them of whats happening in case the children's behaviour changes due to the seperation or they start to be affected by it. They are there to help and will only have your children's best interests at heart.

Trying not to swamp you with too much info, but the best thing is to take it one day at a time. But your main priorities are you, your children, and being able to feed and care for your family. The rest will sort itself out in time.

If you go to www.adviceguide.org.uk you will be able to find various factsheets and info from the CAB, for you to go through as and when needed.
*hugs*