too much for a wedding present?

Tondella

relatives of mine has just bought us a wedding present through our online wedding list. They've spent over £100! I don't know how much they earn or anything but I have a rough idea of what they both do and it's not something that makes me think they can afford £100 on a wedding present, especially when travel and accommodation at the wedding will be over £100 too.

I feel so bad, I hope that they have not put themselves out spending the amount of money they "think" they should spend. I'm not sure why i feel like this, other couples have spent around £80 on items and i haven't felt so bad, but they are in traditionally high-paying jobs.

I just wanted to see what other people thought/would think in a similar situation?
Thanks

Rachie_B

just accept it ,they may have been saving up for ages to get you something special

VickyA_2

It's entirely up to them what they spend on a present........ but I know what you mean! I was shocked when I found that a friend (also not on a high salary) had spent the same sort of money on us. I burst into tears because I was just so overwhelmed! It is amazing how generous people have been and I'm so bowled over.

Basically, don't worry. At the end of the day, it's up to them what they spend their money on........ but it is incredibly generous of them.

Tondella

you're both right, i know, but it's such a shock, I want to express my gratitude to them and acknowledge their generosity, a thank you note doesn't do it justice really?!

VickyA_2

Tondella wrote:

you're both right, i know, but it's such a shock, I want to express my gratitude to them and acknowledge their generosity, a thank you note doesn't do it justice really?!

It doesn't, does it? We had a cheque sent to us by a close friend of the family for, well a very generous amount of money. I 'phoned him to thank him profusely and wrote him a letter about how we would spend it..... but I still don't feel that I've thanked him enough, but it was quite enough for him.

Lillibet_2

Accept it gracefully:D People tend to be very generous with wedding presents, no idea why (I'm tight , it's a £20 charity donation in your name if I'm invited to the chruch bit & a £10 donation if only at the reception as this is what my budget dictates:o) but I know some people really like to help out at what is traditionally a very expensive time.

I'd say send a brief thank you note now but don't go over the top or you might embarass them, then send another thank you note after the wedding along with the rest of your thank-yous.

Congratualtions by the way;)

Hello

I got all embarrassed with the present we received for our wedding. We got married abroad and only my immediate family came with us (long haul, not suitable for inviting extended family and friends), but the amount of presents and good wishes we received from people such as parent's friends that I had not seen in years and years bowled us over. We didn't do a wedding list as we have been living together for over 10 years and didn't need much.

I sent them a thank you note and a wedding photo, just didn't seem enough. My comfort zone is that my Mother thought the letter and photo were thanks enough, so it must have been alright!!

Hello

Counting_Pennies_2

Don't over thank, it gets embarrassing.

Thank them with good grace as you would for all presents, via a thank you note after the event. Many people don't realise you get a running total as you go along in the run up to the wedding, do don't thank prematurely.

When you see them after the wedding make sure the present is on display and that you are seen using it, and that will be all the thanks they want.

When my friend helped me out in a really awful situation she said after me thanking her a lot, the best way to thank me is to stop saying thank you!

Mark7799

A thank you note and a personal visit (if it's practical) then move on

Tondella

Counting_Pennies wrote:

Don't over thank, it gets embarrassing.

Thank them with good grace as you would for all presents, via a thank you note after the event. Many people don't realise you get a running total as you go along in the run up to the wedding, do don't thank prematurely.

When you see them after the wedding make sure the present is on display and that you are seen using it, and that will be all the thanks they want.

When my friend helped me out in a really awful situation she said after me thanking her a lot, the best way to thank me is to stop saying thank you!

oh we'll definitely use the gift, my OH is over the moon with them (whiskey tumblers, though i am sizing them up for my G&T's too!). We chose things we would like to keep forever (my butter fingers permitting). I'm so thrilled that they have bought them for us. I've sort of come to terms about it over the weekend, but it was a such a wonderful surprise at first.

I think we will send the thankyou note along with all the others as obviously we are equally grateful for the gifts bought by other people. I'm also relying on the fact that the running total feature on modern guest lists isn't widely known so people won't necessarily think that we know what we are receiving yet. We've set time aside in the week before the wedding to write out our thank you notes, so that they can go in the post the day after the wedding and arrive while we are on honeymoon. It might be more practical to wait until you return, but two weeks is a long time to wait to thank someone i think. We'll be sure to pop around personally with their christmas card this year too and say our hellos.

VickyA_2

Tondella wrote:

I think we will send the thankyou note along with all the others as obviously we are equally grateful for the gifts bought by other people. I'm also relying on the fact that the running total feature on modern guest lists isn't widely known so people won't necessarily think that we know what we are receiving yet. We've set time aside in the week before the wedding to write out our thank you notes, so that they can go in the post the day after the wedding and arrive while we are on honeymoon. It might be more practical to wait until you return, but two weeks is a long time to wait to thank someone i think. We'll be sure to pop around personally with their christmas card this year too and say our hellos.

I sent the thank you letters that I could, before the wedding (eg people sending us presents directly). Then we had the presents from our wedding list delivered last Tuesday............. and I've still got the other presents which people gave us "off list". In total, we've got 82 thank you letters to write :eek: I'm just overwhelmed how generous people are.