When your oh isn't as keen as you

MollyMalone_4

to get out of debt.

I'm the one that does all the workings out, I'm the one that wants to get out of debt, I'm the one that searches through the internet for cheap suppliers and insurance.

He's just not interested. I came up with a plan that we could start snowballing payments. But he didn't want to do it.He found every excuse going not to do it.

I wanted to be out of debt by the time I'm 30, thats next year. Its not something thats going to happen.

Most of the debt is in his name but we've got out jointly. Therefore I can't make extra payments to his loans because I would assume that I've got to have his authority,or he's got to phone them himself.


What do I do? Is there anyway I can make extra payments to these debts without his authority.

I really want to do this but I need his backing as well and I'm not going to get it. I've tried talking to him and explaining how it makes me feel. I'm under a therapist that I pay privately to see as I was getting really depressed, he doesn't even understand that its the money situation that makes me depressed. Generally he's an understanding guy but when it comes to money he's not bothered.

Any advice would gratefully be recieved.

Molly.

southernscouser

The thing is your a woman right? Now women have a strange power over men. They can "play a game" that men can't refuse if you catch my drift.

If you play the game properly I don't believe there is a man alive who can't be [STRIKE]manipulated[/STRIKE] persudaed to do anything!

Have you had a big heart to heart about it?

sparklymessygirl

Have you got a joint bank account that you can transfer money out of yourself into his loan/cc - I think that should be ok as it will simply come from his normal account (hope this makes sense to you).

I'm sure too that if you have got a credit card statement and are just paying it over the counter of a bank it won't matter who is paying it.

I don't know what else to recommend about his attitude - except just keep going and don't let it defeat you!


Good luck and big hugs
Sparkly x

ZTD

If most of the debt is in his name, then pay yours off first. Jealousy prompted by a few judicious boasts that you're becoming debt-free might turn his head.

Mrs_A.

hiya Molly,
yes i agree with you my lovely husband is just the same are you sure we are not married to the same man lol
no advice to give other than what i am doing which is to save up all the spare money i an isa and when theres enough pay something off early and save the interest charges a little, not to mention making a little interest in your isa.
hope this helps
regards
mrs a

Gemmzie

Employ the age old business technique of


KITA

Kick In The A**

MollyMalone_4

Gemmzie wrote:

Employ the age old business technique of


KITA

Kick In The A**

This is something I've not tried yet:D maybe I should instead of being soft with him all the time.

I've not got any credit in my name, its all in his name. We pay the credit card by direct debit so I never thought of taking the statement to the bank. I will do this, thanks for that.

Sparklymessgirl- do you mean as a standing order?

Ive just brought up the state of our finances at the moment to him, and he said he'd been thinking about it:eek: this is a big shock to me as he's so laid back about stuff. He's agreed to take on some extra work to try and clear our feet a bit. Maybe thats a start. If I keep working on him I'll get there in the end:cool:

Thanks everyone.

Molly

CLAPTON

You might want to consider the approach of discussing the benefits and opportunities that being debt free will bring....just think of the wonderful holidays / house or whatever would be possible once the debts were paid off.
And what about if you want to start a family...the costs of kids and the loss of income are financially bad enough but if you're paying monthly debt repayment it becomes a nightmare.

Perhaps you could get him to post a shared SoA on this board and people may be able to make suggestions to help reduce spending and how to reduce the debts.

for more details about SoA see
http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=107280

judi24

Your OH sounds very like mine. Most of our debt is in his name too. I have one ASDA CC which I use for ASDA shopping to earn points for Christmas. The rest of out debt is in his name. He does not seem to be bothered about it. We have had a long chat about what to do and he seems a bit more supportive. So we shall have to wait and see if he puts his money where his mouth is!
It's hard though when you don't feel supported isn't it?

MollyMalone_4

My salary - £560 (I have 2 part time jobs)
Partners salary - £1500 (varies depending on bonus, but generally averages out at this amount)
Benefits - £121
Child maintenance - £150

Total - £2331

Monthly Outgoings:

Mortgage/Rent - £235.79
Council Tax - £81
Gas - £
Electric - £78 (this is dual fuel, but have changed my suppliers after searching around today. Hopefully this will fetch it down a bit)
TV License - £10.99
Sky £35
Phone - £26
Food - £200
Car Insurance - £28.28(we have 2 cars but managed to pay one insurance up for the year)
Petrol - £120
Life Insurance £38.67
Water £33.45
Building and contents insurance £25.00
Mortgage protection £19.99
Broadband £17.99
Mobile phones £20.00
Pet insurance £14.82 (this is for 2 dogs and I've changed insurers today.This is the new amount)
Pet food £15
School dinners £10 (daughter prefers packed lunch)
Hubbys sandwiches £20 (he takes 2 weeks of packed lunches and 2 weeks of bought sandwhiches from the heart attack city van:rotfl: )
Lottery money £4
Birthdays/xmas/services/mots/car tax £62

Total: £1095.98

Debts

Direct line £275 a month. £2750 left (10 months to go:T )
RBS £349.95 a month £15567.75 left to pay
Tesco £236.00 a month £13688 left to pay (not sure on the exact pence. This is a consolidation loan taken out in may:rolleyes:)
Visa £70 a month £2700 (at 0% and upto the max)
Overdraft stands at 1200 (currently pay nothing to this)
Black horse£48.80 a month £1366.40 left to pay

Total £979.75

Total outgoings £2075.73

Leaving us £255 to try and tackle the above debts.

The mortgage,mortgage protection,contents and buildings insurance was taken out in May. So none of these can be renewed at the moment.

I can't see where I can shave anything else off really, but I would like to start snowballing somewhere. Maybe the black horse finance first?

I don't know the exacts apr's as of yet, but will check them out first thing in the morning.