Can you please help my friends with their debt and to achieve their dreams?

gingercordial

It's very simple:

They CANNOT AFFORD the holiday fund at the moment. Sorry, they're in debt, so they need to deal with that before racking up more on holidays.
They CANNOT AFFORD to have new clothes for every social event they attend. Their friends shouldn't care.
They CANNOT AFFORD to be precious about whether their car is washed by themselves or by a valet service.
They CANNOT AFFORD to buy loads of presents every birthday/Christmas/Easter.
They CANNOT AFFORD Sky. I don't even have a TV and I prefer it that way, but surely five channels are enough?
They CANNOT AFFORD magazines etc. What's more important to him, his quality of life or finishing his magazine collection?

And so on, I'm sure you get the picture! I'm sure you've told them this, but keep at it and don't be afraid to be blunt!

Also tell them to throw their savings at the debt, as unless they've got wonderful savings rates over in Ireland, they're earning less interest than they'd be saving on the debt they could pay off.

happyformonths

Well done Jo4 for trying to help your friends. I can only agree with GingerCordial, CalleyW and the rest though - they really haven't got a clue how serious the problem is.

So they are willing to cut back to the point where they are "only" overspending by £230 a month? That means that in 2008 - when they want to build a "dream house" - they will be another £5520 in debt AS WELL AS the interest on their current debt, which since they are not willing to switch it around (forget a "steady relationship" - force them to read Martin's book!) is going to be substantial. Where are they going to get the money to build the dream house? It'll be pretty difficult getting a mortgage with £60k of unsecured debt, I would imagine.

They seem to think that something magical is going to happen. I wish for their sake that it would, but it won't!

They are in extreme trouble and they have to accept that a complete lifestyle change is needed - I mean complete. It's extremely worrying that they claim they "have" to pay out for expensive presents and wedding outfits because it's expected. They should either do this happily (when they can afford it, which they can't) or not do it at all. There's just bad feeling all round at the moment.

What I think they should do, actually, is move away and have a completely fresh start, if they can't face altering their lifestyle significantly where they are now. I don't mean run away from the debt, I mean get away from the pressures of the situation they're in now - possibly to another country where it's cheaper to live and they have a bit of perspective on things.

They can't keep saying "we just have to spend this much because of X, Y and Z" - things have to change, and if that means moving away then so be it.

There is NO WAY ON EARTH they are going to achieve their dreams. Sorry to put it so bluntly but they can't pretend they are about to be "free" just because their mortgage is nearly paid.

I don't even know why I'm bothering posting at such length because I have a feeling that they're not going to change. It sounds as if the female half of the couple is having a flickering lightbulb, but the male half? Sheesh.

Good luck to you.

HFM

Jo4

I believe I will have an exciting update soon!! :lipsrseal :whistle:

chevalier

DEBT REPAYMENTS
LOANS
Her Car £213.54 (0% to Sept. 2008 inclusive, £5552.04 Outstanding)
His Car £143.12 (5.6% APR to Feb. 2011 inclusive, £7871.61 Outstanding)
NIIB Loan £299.88 (7.8% APR to May 2008 inclusive, £6597.36 Outstanding)
NIIB Loan2 £152.50 (10.8% APR to Feb. 2010 inclusive, £6582.50 Outstanding)
Sainsburys Loan £252.39 (6.35% APR to Dec. 2011 inclusive, £16,405.35 Outstanding)

CREDIT CARDS (Paying £283 monthly)
Citi Card £75 (5.9% lob, £1737.39 Outstanding)
Capital One £34 (5.9% lob, £1108.78 Outstanding)
Her Barclaycard Visa £28 (5.9% lob, £1443.49 Outstanding)
Barclaycard Mastercard £61 (5.9% lob, £2047.24 Outstanding)
His Barclaycard Visa £43 (5.9% lob, £1758.46 Outstanding)
American Express Credit Card £42 (2.9% lob, £1371.78 Outstanding)

Any chance of 0% cards to save interest and help them pay if off quicker. With the amount they owe they would rather have a steady relationship.Sorry I assume you mean steady relationship with these creditors? Why do the creditors deserve ANY loyalty from your friends. If they can get ANY of this debt onto cheaper cards, then it is your friend who are winning. NOT the creditors. There is not profit in loyalty I am sorry to say.



SAVINGS
SAVINGS £10 (They have very little money to fall back on, maybe £500)
Unless they are getting a really good rate of interest, then they are effectively borrowing money to save. I would suggest this goes towards a debt.

PET
Food £15 Can the pet eat cheaper food?
Vets/Jags £2
Worming Tablets £2

BIG ONE OFFS - is everymonth?
Birthdays/Anniversaries/Mothers Day/Fathers Day £20.83 -cut back that is nearly £250 a year on buying presents for others and that does not even included christmas. £10 month should be enough Again this is expected of them.


Holidays/Days Out £104.17 - Need to cut this back to the bone as well. £50 a month should be enough. That is £1250 a year They are considering using half of this amount for debt repayments. Perhaps this year they need to have no holiday at all. Ie using their holiday time, to do carboots, or get stuff up on ebay. Or just have no spend days?

Easter £3 -£36 a year on easter If they buy for children then bung a £5 for there piggy bank much better than chocolate if they can't stop it altogether. My spend on easter is zero. There are 12 children who expect eggs and an adult who expects a gift. There is 5 adults who expect cards. There seems a LOT of EXPECTING going on here. Well sorry but these expectations will have to be curtailed. If they are true friends then the explanation about saving for a house, or another white lie, they should be fine with. If they get stroppy then they are not true friends. As regards the children, then I agree with another poster, who suggested an alternative that isn't tooth rotting might be the answer.

I don't mean to be harsh, but they can't live this lifestyle any more.

I would suggest that talking to Payplan or CCCS might be the answer.
regards
chev

exil

The amount spent on cars is far too much for someone on the income they're on. They MUST sell them, buy 2 cheap cars or preferably move to somewhere less remote!

firesidemaid

Jo4 wrote:

I believe I will have an exciting update soon!! :lipsrseal :whistle:

hi there

i would be very interested to know your friends' update after just reading this thread (and resisting to add my 2pworth as it would be the same as everyone else and out-of-date!)

i can see they have made some headway with their debt. what did they do? did you show them the thread?

please post again soon:cool:

joeblack066

Hi, is there any news on the update?

roswell

I would print thsi and show it to your freind, There is no magic way to suddenly stop the overspend what they need to decide is what isnt worth spending

Monthly Yearly
HOME
Broadband £15.00 £180.00
Electric £44.00 £528.00
Gas (cooker) £4.83 £57.96
Home & Contents Insurance £27.90 £334.80
Home Phone £33.80 £405.60
Mobile Phone Bills £67.02 £804.24
Oil £75.00 £900.00
Oil Burner Service £1.67 £20.04
Sky £18.00 £216.00
TV License £10.96 £131.52


INSURANCE
Life Insurance/Endownment Policy £108.45 £1,301.40


EATS & DRINKS
Eating Out £10.00 £120.00
Groceries £160.00 £1,920.00


TRANSPORT & TRAVEL
His Car Insurance £25.83 £309.96
Her Car Insurance £40.24 £482.88
His Car Maintenence £8.33 £99.96
Her Car Maintenance £41.67 £500.04
His Car Tax £9.17 £110.04
Her Car Tax £11.25 £135.00
His Car Wash £9.75 £117.00
Her Car Wash £4.88 £58.56
His Diesel £65.00 £780.00
Her Diesel £65.00 £780.00


DEBT REPAYMENTS
LOANS
Her Car £213.54 £2,562.48
His Car £143.12 £1,717.44
NIIB Loan £299.88 £3,598.56
NIIB Loan2 £152.50 £1,830.00
Sainsburys Loan £252.39 £3,028.68

CREDIT CARDS (Paying £283 monthly)
Citi Card £75.00 £900.00
Capital One £34.00 £408.00
Her Barclaycard Visa £28.00 £336.00
Barclaycard Mastercard £61.00 £732.00
His Barclaycard Visa £43.00 £516.00
American Express Credit Card £42.00 £504.00


SAVINGS
SAVINGS £10.00 £120.00


PET
Food £15.00 £180.00
Vets/Jags £2.00 £24.00
Worming Tablets £2.00 £24.00


FUN & FROLICS
Cinema Trips & Ink Cartridges for computer £15.00 £180.00


BIG ONE OFFS
Birthdays/Anniversaries/Mothers Day/Fathers Day £20.83 £249.96
Holidays/Days Out £104.17 £1,250.04
Christmas £41.67 £500.04
Easter £3.00 £36.00


CLOTHES, SHOES, ACCESSORIES
Everyday £41.67 £500.04
Work £8.33 £99.96


ODDS & SODS
Chainsaw Engine Oil & Petrol £0.42 £5.04
Her Hair Cuts £10.00 £120.00
His Hair Cuts £6.00 £72.00
Spending Money (£5 each a week) £40.00 £480.00
Lawnmower Petrol £1.25 £15.00
Her Magazine £0.83 (To do with her illness) £0.83 £9.96
His Magazines £19.06 (Partworks) £19.06 £228.72
Membership £0.83 £9.96

£2,544.24 £30,530.88

roswell

Loans alone (pardon the pun) are costing them £12,737.16 a year,

Credit cards are costing £3,396.00

As they dont have enough income to cover there costs the debts will keep growning theres no other way they can keep this lifestyle with out the debt growing and there is no way he can risk not having a income by becoming a driving instructor.

I would direct them to CCCS or similar.

Jo4

Here's the update, they are now at the stage where they are .....
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able to meet all their bills, are repaying their debt as you should see from my signature, are going to be debt free sooner than they thought and are happier than ever although they are waiting for their dream home until 2009 or 2010. Also, they saved for their new home plans seperately and didn't borrow a single penny, even though they cost £5,000. :j

I'm glad I tried to help they out but as you can see from my signature I have kept in contact with them to make sure they eventually see the light at the end of the tunnel. :money: