Can You Live Without Credit? Please Answer.

Nitha

MyLastFiver wrote: »

Can I address the issue of the flash car and the "image"?

To quote a film, "The loudest man in the room is also the weakest". And this is why:

Conspicuous consumption (buying things in order to impress others) is very common, and is usually a symptom of insecure attachments in childhood, resulting in the child looking to the external world for validation, rather than relying on the inner resources of confidence that securely-attached children have.

Insecurely-attached children eventually grow up but continue to look to the external world for their sense of self. The difference now is that they have a credit card, which allows them to indulge in dysfunctional behaviours which can soothe their poor self-image: Status-seeking, fashion-conscious, image-conscious behaviour is enabled by access to credit. Such people are literally "scrabbling around" in shops and showrooms, "buying" an identity by sticking to themselves signifiers of status and success.

Unfortunately, luxury consumer items are a poor substitute for what the insecure person *really* seeks, but because they don't realise that, they continue the spending behaviour until they reach their credit limits.

The lesson?

1. Maintaining an "image" based on conspicuous consumption is dysfunctional behaviour rooted in childhood unhappiness.
2. Spending money, despite the initial "buzz", will not cure the source of any unhappiness.
3. To find the source of your unhappiness, examine your childhood relationships with others, particularly your parents. Memories are often emotional as well as visual. Try to think back to the first time you felt lonely, unloved, helpless or lost. Because it will be those same feelings, now, that make you feel you need a luxury car. What you are looking for is not a car!

If you're not convinced by any of the above, then think about this: What do you think people think of you when they see your car?

Time to stop worrying about what people think! Good luck.

Very good post! I always smile when I see flash cars etc. I live on a council estate and you wouldn't believe the amount of flash cars and fancy kids toys around. I used to think we were the poorest people on the street! I'm now pretty sure that's not the case as we live in one of the very few 'non-council' houses (we're not eligible as we both have well paid jobs). It's probably because we pay huge amounts into our pensions and my student loan!

savingwannabe

Nitha i am the same. Everyone where i work part time shops at Waitrose, they drive flash cars. I dont drive (due to illness) and shop at Asda. They used to laugh at me.

Well i know i dont have any debt and i think before i buy things. It's nice to not be a sheep!!!!

:j

debtfreeforever_2

Yes, of course you / I / everyone can live without credit!

I've already had my LBM and I hope you have yours too. Get real about your finances, reduce all fixed outgoings so far as possible and create a realistic budget for variable costs. Live within your means and you will feel truly free. You couldn't pay me to take out credit now (mortgage aside).

Like other people have said, I couldn't care less what people think now about the fact I don't drive a new car or have all the latest gadgets. I will have a nicer car next year but I'm saving up for it and it will feel absolutely wonderful to pay for it in cash. I'm also buying a new TV and a new sofa at the end of the year and that will be cash too! I will never take out credit again. Ever. End of story.