Oh dear - Was so close to being debt free!

Little_Miss_Uni-Debt

Hello All,

I've come back on here as i've found it to be a great place for help and support over the last couple of years.

I was due to be debt free in Nov 09 after 2 full years of haaaaard work - day and night and weekend jobs, working through holidays or from 8am until 2am - the lot.

I had a few things crop up in Nov 09 that meant I wasn't going to make being debt free by New Years eve.

I think I had promised myself too hard that it would all be over by then that when I found that I needed to wait for a couple more pay days - it totally demotivated me.

3 months on and I've got an even bigger chunk of debt to clear now. Fortunately I managed to get a better paid job now so I can clear it quickly but I need to get motivated and back into money-saving ways and could do with your help!!

What do you all do when you have a slip up. What keeps you on the debt-free road? What should I do next?

All help greatly appreciated!!

Thank you!

niccatw

Hey Little Miss

it's hard slog isn't it! I've learned not to beat myself up so much when I slip up these day - I pick myself up, dust myself down and jump back on the wagon!

I've found I need to let myself have some treats to make it easier. For example, I love my hairdresser and continue to go for a cut and dye and my bit of pampering time. I could get it cut else-where more cheaply but I'd rather make it my treat and I don't go as often as I like!

I think it's importnat to think about the things you love to do and incorporate that into your budget so you don't feel as though you are denying yourself all the time - as that's when I get fed up, stop paying attention and just want to spend!

When I think I'm thinking that way (when I start looking at gorgeous living room furniture online for example, or looking at holidays and justifynig why I could afford then though I know I cant!) then I tend to review my incomings and outgoings and start a spending diary... that way if there has been an improvament, I might allow myself a smaller treat to keep me on the staight and narrow.

And if all of that fails, I talk to my friend who has atrocious spending habits, give him a bit of a lecture, feel a bit better I'm not as bad as he is and than feel I better do as I advised him to do or he'll do that raised eyebrow thing he does :rotfl:!

But most of all - let go ofthe guilt. It happens and we've all done it. Once you work out where your weaknesses are, you can build them into your spending so they're less likely to mess up your best laid plans .

Little_Miss_Uni-Debt

Hi Niccatw,

Thanks for the reply! You're right, I need to look at my weaknesses immediately, see how I got back here. Maybe a new soa?? It's been a while since I did my original one but I've stuck to it very well.

It's all come about because I've been waiting 6 weeks for my new jobs pay to kick in and spent back on cards I vowed never to spend on again. Wages are due to be paid in in the next week so that will be a major boost and I'll need to spend wisely, then I'll have weekly income not monthly so I really need to re-address my spending when I know what my new take-home pay will be.

I'm not sure whether I should set myself a new debt free date....it made me work so hard last time but also made me angry when it didn't come to fruition.

I also need to be a little bit more planned with any treats I have. That way I'm working towards little goals that come sooner!

I'm really keen to take my martial arts practise back up. It's something I had to give up when I took on an evening job. Maybe having a regular 'me' activity will make payin off those chunks of the credit cards seem less daunting. Plus it means I can treat myself to the odd bit of cake if I get back to my exercise regime

Little_Miss_Uni-Debt

I've just done the snowball on What'sthecost.com and an initial debt free date is looking like it's going to be November...again :-S maybe!! Grrr!!

Cloudy456

You've done amazingly well to get this far - I am currently not far off where your starting point was having just had my LBM, and I would kill to click my fingers and be as far ahead as you have now got yourself! So please don't undo all your hard work! November isn't that far off and with a new well paid job maybe you'll be able to bring that forward a bit. I am fully expecting some blips along my road to being debt free and yes it sucks that you're on such a downer so close to the end but do keep going, just keep focusing on how you will feel when you're finally free, versus how terrible you would feel if you had another LBM finding yourself back at square one! And once you've got yourself sorted with the regular pay coming in again, cancel your cards as you clear them to avoid the temptation of using them again!

niccatw

Do what you would do if you were building a house... you'd have a budget in mind but you'd also have contingency for those things that pop up!

I don't have contingency so things like my oven going pop and the radiator leaking have pushed my debt free date back... but I have a general time-scale in my head, not a definitive date. That's to avoid the downer's when things run away from me. Remember, some things are outwith your control. You can only do your best with what you have.

And your right about the exercise! I've recently started yoga and have been going to the gym more often. It helps get out the frusrations and it helps me stay positve when I'm feeling sorry for myself.

Use the snowball as a rough guide and give yourself contingency. So if it says November, have a rough time-scale in your head of a year, maybe? The months you have spare cashflow, you can chuck it at your debt, the months stuff comes up, you won't beat yourself up about it. It also gives you leeway to factor in the treats.

You need to balance paying off your debt with keeping your stress levels within your control! That I definitely know! I let my stress levels get so high they made me ill!

Good luck honey, I'm sure you'll be just fine. You've done it before and you are determined to sort it again. And this time you know you can do it!

Little_Miss_Uni-Debt

Hmm, so very true! I've got to think of it as a full years project not November. See, I have a habit of over estimating what I can afford to pay off each month. Aiming for a huge chunk of my salary and then when I something unexpected crops up it dampens my spirit.

Maybe if I aim for just a reasonable round amount. I can manage to pay off £500 pcm so that'll be nice to see it coming off the totals. It used to take aaages and many nights of evening work to pay off £500 or £125 pw, so I'm setting up a direct debit to make sure that it goes out as soon as I'm paid - if it's not there I can't spend it!!! I know if I bust a gut and aim for £600 it won't happen. It's only 1 months difference any ways!

I'm planning on selling a good stack of my belongings as I'm looking to move house soon, so maybe I could earn a little bit extra and that can go to the fund too. We've found we can get a bigger house for the same rent now so more space would be nice. I actually find moving house quite therapeutic!! :eek: It's a good excuse to have a good throw out / recycle / donate to charity session which frees up lots of lovely space! Space that I can use to do yoga or just dance around like crazy

It has been 7 weeks now and I'm still not sure when I'll get paid! That's the down side to contracting. I've been living off the 'cushion' that I'd built up to keep me 1 month ahead of bills. Im sure I'll have a stack of motivation once my pay comes through. Now I'm at the end of my savings, it's just difficult 'having' to spend on cards (petrol) when I've trained myself not to! Least I'll get it all back soon though and all my bills are up to date and paid!

***Sigh*** I think no matter how long the slog is, it always feels a lifetime away!! :rotfl:Hope you all have a lovely weekend:A

immoral_angeluk

That's life sadly, it's never straight forward and predictable. I WAS debt free a year or so ago. But the joys of seperating from my now exhusband and living on income support while still doing voluntary work and looking after children took it toll and I ended up back in debt to the tune of approx 1500. However I'm now close to being debt free again after what's been a long road.

I think the only way you can deal with it is to accept that sometimes s**t happens and not to beat yourself up about things that you can't control. We're all human and prone to slip ups and life is never straight forward. Take the rough with the smooth and the reassurance that it'll happen one day, even if it's not as soon as you'd like or planned for.

niccatw

So very true immoral_angel. Love your name by the way .

And dancing like crazy definitely helps take the rough with the smooth! Keep smiling Little Miss, you'll get there!

Little_Miss_Uni-Debt

Well I'm making a little headway - I have a living room full of things that I'm selling tomorrow at a car boot. Think it's actually more than a 'car-boots worth' (that well known unit of measurement!) of stuff so I have enlisted my OH to come back up half way through with the rest of the stuff :0D

I'm hoping this cash injection will see me through until I get paid. Whenever that maybe. Seems so distant and far off, it's hard to know how long i'll have to last! I've withdrawn my cash from paypal to stop me going over limit on my current account and my credit card will have to keep me going with petrol until I get paid for my mileage claim. Least I have an economical car so I get more back per mile than it costs me, yay!

I bought a 4 x DVD kick-boxing work out box-set with my Amazon vouchers for about £5.50 so that can get me started getting back into shape for when I can afford going back to my martial arts classes :-) oooh I can't wait now!


Had a great night out last night and it only cost £6 all in! However I DID get a ticket for parking outside my own house despite having a residents permit in the car...grrr. Will need to go and contest it!

Here's to a successful car boot!! Fingers crossed for sunshine and a full money-pot.

Hope you're all enjoying your weekend!!