How do I debt proof my daughter?

Prudent

I am a single parent with one daughter who is 14. I have been a single parent for four years and have had soon hard times financially through that period. I am lucky to have never been in debt, as my user name suggests I am by nature very prudent (though please don't see that as a judgement if you are in debt - I over eat so understand over spending).

I have always talked about money with my daughter. I tell how to budget, how to get the best deals and help her budget her pocket money. I know she appreciates this and is proud that a lot of my friends seek financial advice from me.

However she loves shopping and going out, she can want to spend more than she has. I accept this is totally normal for a teenager. She also find personal organisation difficult as she has dyslexia.

Does anyone have any tips? I am worried that if she does develop debts later, I won't be able to help her out.

Iriahm

why don't you give her a monthly allowance so she will have to buy clothes, going out, spending with friends etc from it. My baby cousin is 14 and it works really well for her and she isn't always dipping in to bank of mum and dad when the pocket money runs out! perhaps those with kids could advise on a suitable amount? That way once its gone she has to wait til "pay day" next month.

if she has difficulties keeping organsied she could keep a spending diary (like us!)

good luck!

Wonder_Girl

Sounds to me like your doing a fine job already, I was going to suggest the monthly allowance but was beaten to it

DontDoDebtKids

Personally, I would try to go down the path of showing her alternatives to the debt-ridden ways of modern living. If she makes a concious choice to be different, then I'd expect her to be more likely to stick with it.

The thing that personally kicked me off was a book called "Rich Dad, Poor Dad". It's a shame I didn't read this alot earlier in my life. Perhaps you should have a read then give it to her to read? I don't think it's too expensive to buy second hand on Amazon (or free from your local library, remember!).

In brief, it goes on about how you should invest rather than spend all your money earlier in life, pointing out the benefits of both starting early enough and playing the money game smartly. It then points out that once you've saved and invested your money you can buy luxury items if you want to with the income from your savings and investments.

It's also explained in simple terms that both dumb people like me and kids would understand.

OK, she may not agree with it, but it may instead get her interested in reading about "money stuff" or at least thinking about it.


That said, it sounds like you're making a pretty good job of it so far. My parents never really talked to me much about money.

Prudent

Will try and get Rich dad, por dad from the library thanks.
I did try an allowance for clothes as well as the things for her pocket money. She told me it was too much to maange and would rather I bought the clothes.

isgman

Get her to look at the Posts Here on the DFW Pages, that may make her think twice about taking on Debt...

Imelda

Hi Prudent,

You sound like a lovely mum, I wish I had financially savvy parents!
When I was younger we didn't have much money and I would always moan that I wanted this or that. So, when I was about 14/15 my mum handed over all the monthly food shopping money (which was basically what we had left after all the bills) and told me that I could keep any change at the end of the month. The first month I had to put £20 of my own money towards it.....
I soon learnt to shop around. The dyslexia could actually work in her favour, my sister has it too and so has never ever opened a credit card, only has a basic bank account and can only relate to money when it's in the physical form (ie cash). She has bought a house with her OH and pays money into a joint account for bills and he takes care of all that (she lived at home before). The total opposite to me!

DontDoDebtKids

Prudent wrote:

Will try and get Rich dad, por dad from the library thanks.
I did try an allowance for clothes as well as the things for her pocket money. She told me it was too much to maange and would rather I bought the clothes.

Let us know how you (both) get on!

calleyw

what about this book

A Girl's Best Friend Is Her Money: The Motley Fool Women's Investment Guide

I got this for my stepdaughter she was a little older than your daughter she was about 19.

Not sure she has learnt from it but that is another story. But if you can get your hands on a copy just have a look and see if you think that it might be of use to your daugther.

Also if you feel happy let her see your accounts/budgets that you run and how you spend your money. That is the best example you can set.

Because I think the biggest shock that young people get when they leave home is the cost of everything. Such as food, gas, electric and council tax.

Yours


Calley

Old_No.7

Hi Prudent, I've read both books and they are both good. Not sure if a 14 year old with dyslexia would finish them, but you can always try. I'd hang in there with the clothing allowance: I was given one when as I was your daughter's age, and so was my older sister. My mum still thinks it's hilarious that my older sister would spend everything on 1 garment, and I'd buy books with mine, haha! My sister tried to get out of the allowance, thinking she'd be better off asking my mum whenever she wanted something, but I'm proud to say that my mum wouldn't let her.

If it's too much to manage, can she keep the clothing allowance in a separate purse perhaps, keep the receipts in there too, so she can see what she's spent and what's left. It really is the best way to learn: to do it yourself and make mistakes now and again.

Good luck with it!

Dr.Lou

I really like that book too calleyw.

When I was a teenager, I think the best advice that my Dad gave me was to never get a credit card, and that most debt (apart from a few exceptions) traps you in and can stop you living the type of life you want to lead.

He also taught me to not care about what other people think (i.e. don't spend money to keep up with the Jones's.), and if I wanted something to save first.

This was shoved down my throat for many years and I think it did sink in eventually. At nearly 30 I still haven't had a credit card (scared of them now!! lol - although I did get a student loan/ overdraft during uni, but I guess that was a need not a want)

I think that if she follows your example she will be fine!