in so much debt - don't know what to do

pollypockett

hi there, really needing some good advice. i am already a member of this forum under another username - haven't posted much in the past but i felt i needed to wipe the slate clean and start again - hence the new name. me and my partner are in soooo much debt - just counted it up and it's about £50,000. i really don't know where to turn. most of our debts have been passed onto debt collecting agents so APRs and things don't apply anymore i think as they should have frozen interest - when i receive any letters from them the balances they have on them seem to be what i have. other debts like provident (yea - i know) have the interest added on at the start and anything you pay comes off this total. our biggest creditor is RBS - who we pay £600 per month to. honestly my whole day at work is living and breathing this debt - it's all i think about. i posted once before regarding this and i think someone replied saying like "what on earth did you spend all that money on!!" yea i know we've been a couple of tw**s and we have nothing to show for all this debt. i really don't know where to start with this. we could consider goiing bankrupt but i genuinely want to repay everything we owe. also, my other half has quite a good management job, and possibly in the future, has the chance to become a director with his company and i know this may jepordise this. please help point me in the right direction of where to start with all this - any advice i receive will be greatly appriciated.

x

Tixy

Hi Polly and welcome (or welcome back)

First it sounds like you need to work out a detailed list of who you owe and how much to each (and also which are still charging interest).

Then you need to work out a full statement of affairs to see how much money you could pay each month to your creditors - http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

Once you have done that post it on here and we should be able to advise better. Have you ever spoken to one of the free debt advice organisations in the past? If not then you'll probably need to do that, but they'll need the same information about your finances so probably worth doing that first.

nolongerindenial

Hi,

First of all, by far one of the biggest Tips I have for you, is whilst taking the debt very seriously, do not let it get on top of you!

I have learnt this the hard way, as a self employed web developer, the more time I spend dealing with my debt, the less money I earn to pay them.

I am not one of those people who will say what on earth did you spend that money on, the debt I have is for a car we used to own but paid off with a loan, a central heating boiler and way too many nights out eating out/drinking than we could financially afford.

I think the first thing you need to do, and I do not know all of the technical jargon from this site yet, is do a Status of Accounts (SOA) and post it up. Then you need to sit down and do a plan of what you can afford and try and make your creditors work within this.

elsie52

Hi,

Well done for taking the first steps by adding it all up and posting on here. Its a very scary moment when you realize just exactly how much you owe. It's just over 2 years since we were in the same situation, we were managing to pay minimum payments on all our cards, loan payments were going out, and then we had nothing left to live on. Cards were all maxed out etc. We owed £74k.............don't ask how we got there....one thing and another, including ill health, taking a less paid job, kids at Uni.....I could go on.!! But that won't help, we needed to do something, so I rang Payplan, and our lives changed almost overnight. They were brilliant, didn't judge us or make me feel embarrassed, although I was dying of shame on the other end of the telephone. They sorted our finances out and we went on a DMP. For us, it was the best thing we did, and we have paid off £40k in 2 years.......still £34 to go, but we will get there, and so will you. I would recommend speaking to Payplan or CCCS and see what they can do for you.....Yes,you will still think about the debt 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, but now its positive thoughts.......we WILL be debt free.

Good luck

pollywoggle

Hi Pollypocket.....great name, nearly as good as mine lol !!!

you probably got your debts the same way me and most people on here got theirs so dont worry, I've only been posting on here for a week so cant help you much, but I know the others can and will, cause their brill
god I'm a poet:eek: and didnt know it!!!

after only a week I feel so much more confident and actually sleep at night now, so take their advice and let them help you . xxxxx:T

BigCraigJohn

Have a read of this aswell, will likely give you a break(if nothing else) well they try and find them.
http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=2305463

InDeepDebt

Hi and welcome (back)

Sound similar to us (wife and I). £69k of debt plus £40k secured loan and then a mortgage.

Are you in communication with your creditors? We did intend to pay all of our creditors back but then some started being @rsey with us. The main culprit was Barclaycard - not a massive debt with them (£5500) but a debt all the same. Barclaycard rejected our payment plan and were phoning us three or four times a day. I've had the cards ages and, as mentioned, I was going to pay off the debt. I'm now looking at seeing whether I can write off the balance by seeing if the card is unenforceable.

Out of our £69k, we may have about £40 that could be unenforceable. From the outset, this was not our ultimate aim. We got ourselves into debt - it was our overspending. But, as most of the creditors have not really been understanding - or just plain awful in their handling of us by phoning us three times in an hour for us to say "I've just told you that", I think 'why not?'

Don't let pride stop you from writing off some of the debt. They'll have got their money out of you in the past with interest and fees.

How old are your cards?

Jim

EDIT

The thread that BigCraigJohn posted above is a good one for seeing if you can write off any balances - oh, have you any defaults against you, btw?

Woowoo

Hi Polly

I can't offer any advice but just wanted to say your not a couple of tw**ts. Whilst I don't owe as much as you, I really couldn't account for where my money has gone.

Good luck with your journey, we will all be debt free one day x

pollypockett

thank you so much for all the replies! i have been in touch with a few debt companies in the last couple of years. one fee paying :eek: and a couple of the non profit ones. i just feel as if we are never going to get out of debt - the hardest thing is at times like this - halfway through the month - all the bills and creditors are paid but we have no money for food, petrol etc. mothers day yesterday (2 mothers and a grandmother for cards, chocs etc) a stag night on saturday - a hen night next staurday,(i do not drink but the meal is £20), mothers, step dads birthday and brothers 18th on 22nd, 23rd,24th march and a wedding on the 10th april (all this would involve is a wedding gift and a few drinks for OH on the night)oh plus best friends having a baby so need a gift for that!! oh god it's soooooo much!! we are actually quite far down the debt road as in - we've been to court, a few of our credit cards have been passed on to collection agencies. an IVA wouldn't be feesible for us (i think) as our main creditor (RBS) has a majority share if you like and they wouldn't agree to it as they have a decree (ccj) against us and could take more in arrestment of earnings, which then takes you down the bankruptcy route - cos if everyone did that bancruptcy would be the only option, even though we have negative equity and they wouldn't be able to make any profit from taking our home. god it makes you soooo depressed - i just automatically reach for the cream cakes! then that gives a whole new set of problems!! we can't really reduce any payments as one is on a ccj and the rest are already reduced payments - i hate to sound so pessamistic when people are being so helpful but i really can't see any way out x

pollypockett

i know what you mean In DeepDebt - i feel the same, i relly want to pay everybody back from a moral point of view but they get so awful towards you, you do think what the heck, why should i stay awake all night worrying about paying you back when you couldn't give a monkeys about me? thank you woowoo for your kind words - i hope your right x thanks pollywoggle - we could be DFW twins! and thank you to everyone x

dancingfairy

Hi - I'm not sure why the plans failed in the past - were they unrealistic? were you not ready to tackle your debt then? whatever - I'm sure you can make a fresh start. With a dmp you would allow yourself money for food, clothes, electric, gas , rent etc and what's left would get divided up between the creditors each month - yes you would default on the minimum payments and ruin your credit record which sounds like it has already happened.
Also you should have a little slack in your budget but it might not stretch to hen parties and wedding etc -so you may have some tough choices to make - but with some creative food shopping and present buying outfit buying i'm sure you could do some of them.
Anyway - there's nothing to stop you starting over on the DF waggon.
Best of Luck
df