am I going mad? or working money out wrong?

Josie64

some of you reading my posts have suggested me getting a part-time job , good idea , if I thought that extra income would make a difference , I'll explain why...last year in march , I was made redundant and bought a car
(2nd car , cost 695 and 400 ish insurance was paid for on credit cards) cos I was learning to drive at the time , so was my son ( lessons were paid for by my mum for birthday presents).
anyway about oct/nov time we had really heavy rain and cos of leaking rear window seal the car was totally soaked inside , anyway hubby spent 30 on a vax thing to soak up water , ok i thought let it dry out and keep the car and get seal fixed , but hubby went out one day and he sold it to a scrap yard for £50 !!! and then got another c/card with 2 thou limit on it and went and bought another car for 1,000 saying it was cheaper than fixing the old car.

in december I had a temp job for 5 weeks - pay = 178 a week , I spent 10 a week on dinners but bank account still going further overdrawn?

in June this year cos hubby off work since april and living on 90 a week we sold it, got 800 for it, so that made bank 300 overdrawn ( 2 thou overdraft) so as far as I was concerned that was the mortgage/bills coverd till hubby went back to work in July but checking the bank account 10 days later , the balance was 1,300 overdrawn ? bear in mind brother-in-law had put in 500 to cover June mortgage so that made outgoings 200 a week instead of 300 , the most we paid out during this 10 days was 150 on two new tyres, 49 a week is transferred into car account to cover petrol/road tax/ins and garage bills but hubby says there is nothing in this account for car bill of 293 (due 1st july)and has been using main bank a/c for petrol? and not been paying gas/elec or council tax either.

I've not drawn an money off cash point since april so question is where is money going? Also made 200 on ebay as well , so including selling car makes a total of 1,000 extra gone into bank account

1) secret mistress/ child
2) secret gambling problem (lottery?)
3) secret provident account with rip off interest rates
4) swiss bank account?
5) identity theft?

but when I ask hubby where is money going , the reply is " I'm sick of this, I've had enough, i'm leaving" , I keep thinking I'm going mad but worrying where all the money is going? or am I just working out money wrong?

sorry for long post and thanks for reading

Brassic

Erm, don't your bank statements tell you? Can't you check the account online and keep track of where everything is? Or is hubby drawing out large amounts of cash (rather worrying if so and something you'd need to talk to him about).

oakdale_minx

hi there - have you asked him what has happened to the £49 p/w that has been transferred into your car fund account? He hasn't taken out any other CC's has he to make up for the loss of wages/salary and he's trying to pay that off rather than the council tax etc?

We'll help you out with this, and no,you aren't going mad.

Josie64

£49 pw , yes , and I get the reply as posted above , as for another c/card , possibility , I've done a search on experian ( now cancelled and Halifax kept being mentioned but we don't have Halifax account?) . and no-one else has access to this comp only us

in september last year he got a/leicester c/card and by the time the 1st statement came round it was up to its 2 thou limit!!!

Floss

If its a joint account, you need to get down to the bank & ask for statements - and then ask for a copy to be sent every month to A.N.Other address (mum? friend?)......at least you would be able to see where the money is leaking to. Or ring them up & ask for copies for last 6 months to be sent to safe address (sounds very MI5-ish, but you DO need to know where your cash is going)

And I'm sorry, I know this is going to sound harsh, but if he did go, maybe your cash-leak would be stopped & you may be better off

Dr.Shoe_2

Some people have difficulty accepting that they are out of work and no longer have the same income. My father was just the same for years. But it does beg the question, what is he spending it on?

lynzpower

Oh darling, I feel terrible for you. Wherever its going, you need to know about it, as far as I can see you have been the only one earning for a while so ( and I know this sounds harsh to those married among us) YOUR money is being taken somewhere without your knowledge.

I suggest you get yourself a seperate bank account, and have your wages go into that, and then for your half of the bills etc pay it into the joint account, Encourage hubby t o do the same, and chop the cards so that no one can take anything out of your bills account. Fairs fair.

Hes back at work now if he wants to squander his leftovers on lottery or something else then fair dos. Do you think he has a mistress? Any phone calls or anything that have been worrying you?

Josie64

Brassic wrote:

Erm, don't your bank statements tell you? Can't you check the account online and keep track of where everything is? Or is hubby drawing out large amounts of cash (rather worrying if so and something you'd need to talk to him about).

bank accounts just look like usual for food and bills etc , never large amounts of cash....

lynzpower

is th crux of the matter josie that hes made some pretty unwise choices with these big purchases then?

frosty

maybe a spending diary will help, you each have to write down every penny you spend,you write it down as you spend it not at the end of the day because its easy to forget things,this really helped us to regain control over our spending.

Josie64

oakdale_minx wrote:

hi there - have you asked him what has happened to the £49 p/w that has been transferred into your car fund account? He hasn't taken out any other CC's has he to make up for the loss of wages/salary and he's trying to pay that off rather than the council tax etc?

We'll help you out with this, and no,you aren't going mad.

hmm, never thought of that...its nice to know there is support on here