Help and advice needed urgently...

Buzz123

Hi, I'm in desperate need of some advice and guidence I guess.

I have a lot of debts, which are sort of under control (ie not getting bigger!!), but are also not going away.

I have two huge problems 1. my husband has no idea. 2. I'm expecting our second child in July.

I am under no illusion that this is going to get sorted in the short term, however I need it to be managable.

I currently have about £8k on a Lloyds TSB Duo credit card at their standard rate.
£6500 on a Halifax cc at 3.5% for the life of the balance.
and I am £2500 overdrawn.
I am paying £300 per month off Lloyds and £350 off Halifax. But obviously as of July this will have to dramatically drop.

I have just been offered 6.95% life of balance transfer to halifax as well - I guess I should put it all on the one card??!?!

Help please. Thank you

System

Hi Buzz,

First of all welcome along and congrats on the baby news.

What you should do is list your SOA on here so people can see if there's anywhere that you can cut back to save money, which can then be thrown at the debt.

http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

You will also be advised by people on here to come clean with your OH so that you can work at the problem together. As you are about to have another baby, I would suggest that this is probably a good idea. But it is, of course, entirely up to you.

You've made the first step towards becoming debt free, so now onto step two!

Red.

immoral_angeluk

I'm going to echo what no doubt everyone else will say, you need to tell your OH. If you don't it will eat away with you, and I'm sure you'll find it no surprise to hear that debt and money problems are one of the biggest causes of relationship breakdowns, especially where one hasn't been honest with the other. The sooner you tell him the better and you can work at it together.

Buzz123

Right here it is:

Monthly Income Details[/b]
Monthly income after tax................ 1500
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 450
Total monthly income.................... 1950[/b]
Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 250
Mobile phone............................ 40
Groceries etc. ......................... 500
Clothing................................ 200
Petrol/diesel........................... 120
Road tax................................ 12
Car Insurance........................... 37
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 21
Other child related expenses............ 20
Buildings insurance..................... 24
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 50
Haircuts................................ 25
Entertainment........................... 150
Holiday................................. 50
Emergency fund.......................... 20
Total monthly expenses.................. 1519

Secured & HP Debts[/b]
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 0........(250)......0
Total secured & HP debts...... 0.........-.........-
Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Halifax Credit Card............6500......350.......3.5
Lloyds tsb Duo.................8000......200.......15.9
Total unsecured debts..........14500.....550.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 1,950
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 1,519
Available for debt repayments........... 431
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 550
Amount short for making debt repayments. -119

Sorry I haven't copied and pasted it very well. In brief there are no house bills as my husband covers those, I cover everything else for the 3 of us soon to be 4!. The £250 mortgage payment, is on my 2 buy to let properties, I see it as my/our pension!

Looking forward to your replies.

Thank you.

PS. In the meantime is it worth adding my Lloyds debt to my Halifax card at 6.95% even though the other is at 3.9% that is already on there?

savingmummy

Hi and welcome to the forum.

You have taken the first big step by asking for advise and facing up to your problem - well done.

Do a accurate SOA include ALL income and ALL outgoings Plus debts/APR`s!

CUT up the cards!!

You NEED to tell your DH. Two heads are better then one and he also needs to know the situation right now! He may find out from someone else which would be worse.
My DH kept his loan a secret from me but had to tell me as he just felt so worried and was effected by the `secret`. He was so relieved to tell me.
Yes i was shocked and angry at first, BUT it didnt last long and we sat down and made plans.
Knowing your trying to get it sorted and wanting to do it will reassure him too!

Good luck x

savingmummy

Buzz123 wrote: »

Right here it is:

Monthly Income Details[/b]
Monthly income after tax................ 1500
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 450
Total monthly income.................... 1950[/b]
Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 250
Mobile phone............................ 40 can this be reduced/cancelled? ring and haggle (go payg)
Groceries etc. ......................... 500:eek:reduce this!! meal plan, drop a brand, stick to a list of what you need!! i spend 150 for 4 of us!!!
Clothing................................ 200:eek: a mth??? stop!!! use what you have! new clothes every month is not nessesary
Petrol/diesel........................... 120 can this be cut back somehow?
Road tax................................ 12
Car Insurance........................... 37 is this the cheapest??
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 21
Other child related expenses............ 20 what is this??
Buildings insurance..................... 24
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 50 :eek:reduce this!!
Haircuts................................ 25 find cheaper/do it yourself
Entertainment........................... 150:eek: too high!!!
Holiday................................. 50 is this booked??? i would do a cheaper holiday if NEEDED if not miss one this year
Emergency fund.......................... 20 how much is in this?? use it now?
Total monthly expenses.................. 1519

Secured & HP Debts[/b]
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 0........(250)......0
Total secured & HP debts...... 0.........-.........-
Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Halifax Credit Card............6500......350.......3.5
Lloyds tsb Duo.................8000......200.......15.9
Total unsecured debts..........14500.....550.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 1,950
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 1,519
Available for debt repayments........... 431
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 550
Amount short for making debt repayments. -119

Sorry I haven't copied and pasted it very well. In brief there are no house bills as my husband covers those, I cover everything else for the 3 of us soon to be 4!. The £250 mortgage payment, is on my 2 buy to let properties, I see it as my/our pension!

Looking forward to your replies.

Thank you.

PS. In the meantime is it worth adding my Lloyds debt to my Halifax card at 6.95% even though the other is at 3.9% that is already on there?

you need to include your DH`s money and expenses too!
Going by your SOA your ocerspending too much - comments in red!

Britwife

I think with savingmummy's advice you will be saving about £600!!

and as the others have pointed out, tell your dh, you are married for better or for worse hun and you will get through this.

Congrats on your pregnancy!!!

savingmummy

So people can some ideas on how i become df quick i am going to bore you with what i did and how i did it.

* cancelled my storecards and catalogues.
* I got rid of my mobile - didnt miss it and still dont have one!!
* I cut my childrens hair and DH`S. My hair i get done once a year (treat from mum).
* I stopped using buses - walk everywhere despite living in rural area!
* Groceries i stick to a strict list of what we NEED, dropped brands, used vouchers, bogof`s, halved my meals and used other half to feed 2 children so in reality only cooking for 2 adults, soup before main meals, bulked food out to make it go further, have 2 meals a week at parents, NO meals/takeouts - we spend £150 a month on food:T no extras inbetween food shop days!
* Started earning from surveys - used these for xmas/birthday for DH he gets a cd for each occasion lol! He loves it though especially it being FREE!! i only buy for children noone else and spend £20 each!
* I don`t buy clothes for myself or DH we use what we have, get clothes for birthday/xmas off family, get donations for DD from nursery friends and so only buy for DS (his wardrobe consistes of 3 trousers 5 tops) about £20 every 6months we spend on him. He does however wear PINK pj`s :rotfl:
* Saved on electric by being careful, candles at night, reducing tv/pc time, turning everything off at main switch, charging DH`s mobile up at work, reduced tumble drier useage, hand wash when appropriate, ES lightbulbs.
* incoming calls only on home phone so only pay line rent no call bills.
* make my own bread, yoghurts, biscuits, cake - kids enjoy it too!
* DH saves on petrol by only using it if he HAS too - mainly to and from work! cycles to shops etc.
* No shopping trips out - can`t remember the last time i visited a mall.
* NO holidays. We just have days out which are FREE!
* DH takes his flask and lunch into work.
* NO newspapers/magazines - use online
* Got DD clean day and night :j
* Stopped sky
* Stopped birthday cards and just send email/text!
* Sold on ebay - this alone paid one of my debts in full!:beer:
* Carboot last summer - paid part of our water bill!!
* Used spare paint family had to decorate 2 rooms indoors.
* Asked for money for xmas/birthday:rotfl:it worked!


If i think of more i will add x

Buzz123

Thank you for your comments. And yes there are definately areas that I can save. And I will get onto it straight away.

With regard to dh's income, he is self employed, all of the house expenses are covered by the business, but he dosen't draw anything else out - I cover all of it. Which is why some things are high - mainly because he has no idea of the situation I am in!!

As with regard to telling him - I know it's the right thing to do. But I just feel I need to get things into some sort of order first. He totally disagrees with people getting into debt etc etc. However he has also had a very fortunate up bringing and would have no idea/understanding of anyform of borrowing what so ever.

thank you

savingmummy

Thank you for your comments. And yes there are definately areas that I can save. And I will get onto it straight away.

well done!!!:T Its hard facing it and having to cut back.

With regard to dh's income, he is self employed, all of the house expenses are covered by the business, but he dosen't draw anything else out - I cover all of it. Which is why some things are high - mainly because he has no idea of the situation I am in!!

He is going to have to help out now! you can`t do it all alone.

As with regard to telling him - I know it's the right thing to do. But I just feel I need to get things into some sort of order first. He totally disagrees with people getting into debt etc etc. However he has also had a very fortunate up bringing and would have no idea/understanding of anyform of borrowing what so ever.

OK.
The fact that you have made a start by doing a SOA is a huge step as to making a plan! Print it off if you have too and go through it together (once his ready)
Not to mention your making a plan to reduce outgoings to repay debt! That is a start of an order in my books!! :T
He needs to know so you can both sit down and discuss where to go from here, you will be so much more relieved too.

If you go to your bank for advise they will just try and sell you more debt to cover your existing (what my DH did).
I am not sure what other ways of getting in order there is tbh unless you choose to see the bank - i wouldn`t advise this though!

Stressed mummy = stressed baby so tell daddy please mummy

Just to add we are all here if you need a chat or a rant
EVERYONE on here is or has been in debt, most have kept it from a OH so we all know how your feeling right now xxx