StressStressStree

Lexxi

This is a bit complicated so sorry if it doesn't make sense.
The pub we are in at the moment, we don't have a long term agreement for, just month to month, we would love a long term agreement but it isn't making enough money for us to pay what is being asked. Tomorrow we have to show people around who do want it on a long term agreement, we don't know who these people are or what money they have.
If they pay what is being asked and they could afford it, it would take around 6 months to break even and another 6 to make back what you lose in the first 6 months.
We don't have any money to lose, we don't have any money to spend or save for that matter.
We want to get married here, the village church is lovely, the pub is gorgeous, everything about the whole area and buildings are just amazing. If we don't get this place though everything is back to the drawing board, I've resisted putting down any deposits or confirming anything becuase if we aren't here I don't know where we will be. We don't have any connections with the area so wouldn't really make a special trip up here for the church, we don't want a reception in someone elses pub, plus having it at our place would really help the budget, we could cover the cost of the bar too and I'd love all my family to see the place, no one has been over yet.
We're on a reduced rent at the moment and we're still about 5 grand short each month.
We've got first refusal but it depends if these people have the money to pay what they are asking, I know that there is some flexibility but no one would trn the highest bidder away but even if the viewers can say we'll take it/pay what you're asking what if they then lose the place becase they don't realise how much it is losing, it'll do the pub so much harm.

I don't want to get married anywhere else, there's the church my parents got married in but nowhere for a reception and the area is horrible, I spent most of the last 5 years trying to get away. I keep feeling like I'm going to burst in to tears and I know it might not be that bad but I've not slept properly for the last week thinking about it and now it's tomorrow I can't sleep at all.

Sorry if I don't make any sense, I'm shattered, I shall update after the meeting

bubble96

im so sorry, it sounds like you are having a horrible time and i really feel for you. Its not nice when its the place you work and live aswell, but, you need to look at this from a different perspective, you are at a loss each month - how long has that been going on for? is there really any chance of it improving? As much as we love our homes and get our hearts set on the way we want things to be, we must remember that its all superficial, its nice to have the things we want for our wedding but its not the most important part, and our homes are at the end of the day just buildings - its us that make them homes.

You need to sit down and think about what you really want and look at financial implications properly. You think you would be keeping costs down by having this place for your wedding but its losing you money, you could end up in a lot more debt by staying where you are.

I do really feel for you. My dad has always been self employed and he hasnt had the best of luck in the past, and i have to say that one thing i noticed as i was growing up was that he didnt know when to call it a day because he was not willing to give up on something he put so much time and effort into, and often that lead us to a worse financial position. Dont let sentimentality and desire cloud your financial judgement. It may not be what you want to hear but it really is the best advice i have. x

Lexxi

Thanks for the advice, we were only put in here temporary as it was losing money, otherwise it would have been shut. We took over at the start of the year, it is in a very good area and has very little competition around. It took over a quarter of a million last year, that was with the kitchen being shut for 5 months, it needs work doing, like building up again, not in a structural way. No one has looked after it, cleaned it etc. Our area manager has said he is willing to work with us but we have to work out what we can afford, how long the place will take to build up, which with there not being any real competition not long, the take has trippled since we opened the kitchen.
i know it's stupid to be sentimental about an area but it's beautiful, the people are the opposite end of the scale from where we come from, the whole area is, it's where me and OH started our lives together without everyone else interferring in it.
It's not just about keeping cost down for the wedding, it's a gorgeous building, it's personal to us, I wouldn't know where to start looking for a venue if we changed!

Thank you for your comments, I am sort of thinking clearly with this, despite the lack of sleep, I can't afford to take something on that will cost us any more or that we can't afford as it's in my name so I've got a lot to lose. Going to have a chat with OH when we have looked through the papers and stuff

floss2

Why not speak to the vicar and to the pub company about having your wedding at the church and reception in the pub - even if you are no longer living there? Explain about the facts that the church, area & building are personal to you & how much it would mean to you both.