Help with wording please...

Phyzelda

Sorry give me a Maths problem and I'd have a better chance than trying to word my own invitations to my wedding.

I'm currently trying to write out my "guest information" insert for my daytime guests. Below is what I currently have written... please can you have a read and help me tweak it, as I'm not 100% happy with it and I think it could be and should be worded better

Thank you in advance!! :A

Accommodation - For a complete list of local hotels and B&Bs please see our website. Likely to be the most popular: XYZ, location and ZYX, location.

Transport - We will be providing transport for guests to and from the venue, though personal arrangement to relevant pick up points maybe required. Times and pick ups to be confirmed. Please ensure you let us know where you are planning on staying so we can arrange pickups at central points.

Wedding List (MAJOR HELP NEEDED!!) We know it's not traditional, it's not the way it's done, but instead of a wedding list, we'd like a bit of sun, so if you'd wish to give us a gift then money towards our honeymoon or vouchers to spend around our home would be very much appreciated.

Photos - Although we will be hiring our own photographer, please can we ask our guests to feel free to take photos and if possible may we ask for a copy to be sent to us, we'd like to keep as many memories from our special day.

Website - Our website address is ............................. on here you will find more information about our special day, you can also RSVP to us.

We do hope you can join us to celebrate our special day

Re the wedding list - We are currently in the middle of buying our own house, and therefore have the basic living bits and bobs. Therefore vouchers or donations toward the honeymoon was what we thought would be best. hope that helps explain our position

Tea and Biscuits to all thats read all the above!! :T:rotfl:

bubbles0169

congrats on moving it forward
i think you can miss out on the photo bit and just ask people to send you their best photos but ask them by mouth rather than on the invite
wedding list- why not look up online one of those little ryhmes that ask for money instead of pressies i think theyr cute but cant remember one exactly
do you really need to state transport arrangements? could you do it by mouth or ask someone else to
the accomodation is a good idea though i think its worded fine:)
hth

Happy_Girl_2

a couple of weeks ago, there was a thread about using A-Z lists for the wedding info, and a few examples were listed. You could have a look for the thread and see what you think? Personally, I thought it looked less 'stiff' than just writing a block of text, and allows you to add a touch of personal humour to the list

To give you the just, it was like
A is for Accommodation - There are a number of hotels nearby
A is for Arrival Time - the wedding is at 3pm, so we kindly request you aim to arrive at the church by 2.45pm
B is for Bridesmaid - Alison, Jenny and Rebecca are my Bridesmaids
C is for Confetti - the venue does not allow confetti to be thrown
D is for Dancing - We have a DJ who will play music form the 80's until 1am
E is for Eating - we will be serving a 2 course wedding breakfast at 5pm

etc etc

Bo_Peep

We did this (Happy Girl's suggestion above) and a lot of the guests commented that they liked it. My friend did the same for her wedding a few months later and it also means you get to put more information in there than a standard block of text would allow you to.

I think it's also a bit more personal than standard text as your guests get to find out a bit more about the background things they might not otherwise be aware of (bridesmaids names, time of meals, etc.) I know I have been to a few weddings where I'd have found that sort of information useful and also a nice touch.

I like what you've got so far though - maybe you could incorporate that into the A-Z if you decide to do that. A website is a good idea, too - we had one and you could put this text on the website as well for people to refer back to in case they lose their invitation insert.

You're on the right track - enjoy the planning part - it will go so quickly!

Phyzelda

Thanks for the responses.

Unfortunately I won't have space to do the A-Z idea, as nice as it is. I might do it on our website though.

The rectangle it needs to fit into is 9.5cm x 14 cm The above paragraph fits in with a few lines to spare. Just English Lit was never my strong subject at school

Bubbles - due to the number of family members coming from across the country it's just easier to include the transport bit it in the invite than to make sure I speak to everyone. Due to our venue being out in the middle of no-where the transport is the easiest thing

frannyann

I've cut and pasted mine if its any help?

Important information

Arrivals: Ceremony starts at 3.30pm. Please arrive with plenty of time to park; the hotel car park is very small, on road parking is possible but limited (head away from the xxx for better parking ‘spots’) and there are public (pay) car parks close by. The hotel is marked below, for public car parks follow signs for town centre (A26 marked in white boxes)

Hotels: To stay at the xxxx. There is a Travelodge very close by with its own car park: 000 The Russell Hotel is almost opposite xxxxx Smith & Western Bar and Hotel is a short taxi ride away: 01892 550750
Taxi firms: Streamline: 01892 511911 Walkers: 01892 522522
Menus: Please make a selection from each course, you can request sauces are removed just mark that on the menu. Vegetarian food can be requested, contact xxx to discuss menus. Please write your first and last name as you wish it to appear on the table setting. Child portions are smaller versions of the menu.
RSVP: Please can we have RSVP’s and menu choices back by 31st July 2010.
Wedding gifts: We do not have a wedding list; we would just like your company. However, if you feel that you would like to mark the day, we have a just giving page: http://www.justgiving.com/xx or we are saving up for a honeymoon to be taken at a later date.

frannyann

there is a map below the Arrivals info, but it doesn't copy for some reason!

I have edited a few XXXX to make a little vaguer!!

Lexxi

I like the wording for your gifts bit frannyann. We were all trying to come up with something which didn't sound like we had our hands out!

frannyann

Lexxi wrote: »

I like the wording for your gifts bit frannyann. We were all trying to come up with something which didn't sound like we had our hands out!

Thanks, we didn't want to 'ask' for money as such and we don't have enough space for the stuff we have now!! This way people who feel is 'wrong' to give money can make a donation to charity instead.