Its a long haul

domesticgoddess

Trying not to get fed up at the moment and concentrate on now......... I'm on a joint DMP and its a biggie. We have 7 years before we will be debt free, have been on a joint DMP now for over 2 years. I have to say we are mentally struggling at present, well I know I am. I find myself fed up as it isn't moving as quick as I want. CCCS are great but there are times I just feel I want to speak to someone and say I'm finding it hard always counting etc. There are times when I feel empowered and rejoice cos I've changed, not mindless comsumer etc, but then there are times when I feel that "I want" when I see something that I think I need. I can't talk to friends and my family don't know how bad it is (well other than husband).
Sorry for the moan.
Is there anyone else on a long haul DMP?
DG

gonzo127

all i can say is just be glad you have a 'we' situation, some days i feel very much as i am in a 'me' situation as i do not think my wife has fully accepted how much she has to change her life to pay of the debts,

as my personal debt is constantly getting less however i have found out that hers has been getting higher, and she has just maxxed out her credit card, so what has she done to make herself feel better, ordered something of of the next cataloge! some days i could kill her! at least last year i managed to knock £3000 of my own debt compared to her increasing hers by £1500 so overall we are still better but i just wish i didnt have to battle with her so much about these types of things!

domesticgoddess

gonzo127 wrote: »

all i can say is just be glad you have a 'we' situation, some days i feel very much as i am in a 'me' situation as i do not think my wife has fully accepted how much she has to change her life to pay of the debts,

as my personal debt is constantly getting less however i have found out that hers has been getting higher, and she has just maxxed out her credit card, so what has she done to make herself feel better, ordered something of of the next cataloge! some days i could kill her! at least last year i managed to knock £3000 of my own debt compared to her increasing hers by £1500 so overall we are still better but i just wish i didnt have to battle with her so much about these types of things!

Could she be in denial? It took my husband a long time to admit he had a problem, I am glad its a we situation it does help. She will hopefully get there soon. It is hard I think, I recently changed banks again and can't believe that they offered me a CC. They were in shock when I said NO, I don't think they had ever had anyone turn them down. No way do I want a CC.

gonzo127

oh yes she is in denial, and really does not want to have a change of life style, using the usual excuse of whats the point in being alive if you cant do anything! and when i say you can do things and enjoy yourself, not everything requires money she usualy has a reply that you cant do free things when the weather is bad and so on and so forth anyways had enough of the circular arguements they do not get me anywhere so i am just trying to get my debt sorted so when she has her lightblub moment i can help her as much as possible, the good thing is that she doesnt currently work so can not get any more credit than she has at the moment (the maxed out credit card and the next director) so i keep hopeing that she will see the light sooner rather than later

studiorex

Personally what I love about CCCS is their monthly note showing how much I've paid off. Keeps me motivated and focussed for the month ahead.

7 years to go is a long time but you will get better at budgeting, your wages will increase, you will find other ways to make money. That 7 years will come down as quick your outstanding debt.

Keep smiling and 'have an early night' (it'll save on heating and electric).