Saving time by making the kids do some of the work

Sallys_Savings

I am now seeing the error in my ways
Being a SAHM has meant that I have been always around to do all the chores and have automatically done everything rather than the children contributing.

Which I know is not good for them and I am trying to change, honest

Now my youngest is 13 I am looking to go back out to work after the summer holidays (one more summer hols of days out and trips to enjoy ). With going out to work on the horizon I am desperately trying to get my children to help out a bit more.

Over the last few weeks I have been getting them to do a few more things, and its definitely hitting them hard.

Hopefully over the next few months I'll have them trained up (wondering if I could send them away to be trained somewhere like you can gun dogs lol)

Luckily, they are all being great about it and realise that I need their help..

Becles

I've always had my children do jobs round the house. They are also responsible for getting themselves washed and dressed both morning and night.

It's good for them in later life too. My neighbours adult children are 26 and 28. Although they each have their own homes (both single) they cannot do anything in them. She goes round and cleans for them, does their washing and they come back to her house for most cooked meals. She buys groceries for other meals and puts them in their cupboards/fridge for them.

She was laughing a couple of weeks back as the lads had been away on a Haven caravan trip, where you get issued with bed linen in a bag on arrival to make your own beds. She thought it was amusing that neither knew how to make a bed, so they had slept on the matresses instead :eek:

My son was round there last night and commented that their 9 year old was playing in the garden and wanted a drink, so she yelled through the house "Mam I want a drink" and her Mam got up off the sofa, made one and brought it out. My two would never do this and would just come in and make themselves a glass of squash.

Mine can already cook simple meals and understand how to do some household tasks. They already know a little about budgeting too, and the eldest is aware of the bills I have to pay each month. I hope this all helps them to survive on their own when they get their own places, rather than still be totally reliant on me when they are adults.

Karb

That sounds really good Becles. I always try to get mine to do stuff around the house as well - at least the older ones who are 11 and 9. If they don't do chores then they don't get pocket money.

The only thing I differ on is the getting a drink for themselves. I always make sure they ask first rather than just helping themselves. But once they've asked then they will go and do it themselves.

thriftlady_2

Becles wrote:

She was laughing a couple of weeks back as the lads had been away on a Haven caravan trip, where you get issued with bed linen in a bag on arrival to make your own beds. She thought it was amusing that neither knew how to make a bed, so they had slept on the matresses instead :eek:

:eek: I'd be so embarrassed if they were my kids.You're doing children no favours if you don't teach them some life skills.

joannasmum

DD is only 19 months old but I definately plan to make her do her bit round the house. Even now she is given a duster when I dust, and I have a routine of airing her bed etc in the mornings that hopefully I'll be able to pass onto her when shes old enough. I do not want to have breed a child anything like my DH was when we moved in togerther, he phoned me at work to ask how to open the washer door. :eek:

skystar

I must be too soft. My stepson who is ten only has to put his dirty washing in the basket (and this is in his room so not too much of a struggle).

It must be either because I am a control freak and like everything done my way or when I was younger I did diddly squat at home. My mum completely spoiled me.

Maybe I should be ashamed to write this but here goes....
I lived at home until I was 22 and until that day all I did in the house was put my dirty washing away. In the morning my mum would come into my room and open my blinds/curtains, make the bed and hoover. She made all my meals and even when I started working and maybe not coming in until 9:30pm my dinner would be ready for me. When finished I would return my plate to the kitchen and she would wash the dishes.

My mum never worked from when my older sister was born so she seen this as her "work" and I just thought it was normal coz thats how I had been brought up.

However as soon as I moved into my own house I just seemed to know how to do things.....must have been just by watching my mum coz it wasn't through practice!!

Just remembered this as well.....when I was at uni and then started working she still gave me lunch money!

Kazonline

I absolutely love this thread - and thanks to those who made me chuckle.

I am a firm believer that part of our jobs as parents is to teach our children 'life skills'. As I have three boys it seems even more the case as somehow they never seem to 'see' what needs doing. Even when asked to do something, although they are very willing they often ask 'how' - even when it seem baltently obvious.
I put it down to the fact that my boys are doing extremly well in school - they must have gone in the 'academic' ability queue twice instead of getting some 'common sense' (As I typed this DS3 gave another classic 'male' behaviour - I'm busy typing and his pen runs out as he writes down an address - that he asked me to find even though he has access to it himself - and asks me if he can have another pen. I say yes - and he just stands there. What he meant was 'mother go find me another pen!! Honeslty, he is not lazy - he will do anything I ask of him (unlike DS2) but just doensn't get on and do things of his own accord!!!)

Kaz x

Prudent

My dd 14 has done regular jobs around the house for years. I am a single parent with a very demanding job. I if I did all the housework, I wouldn't have time to actually spend with my daughter. I have always worked by saying to her : this is what needs doing , if you help we can go and do (whatever the choice is). Now she is at the stage where she wants lots of lifts. The only way I can manage to do that is if she helps with some of the jobs.

I think it helps make children more responsible to do jobs. It also boosts their self confidence because it is another skill they have ogt.

bluenose1

Kazonline wrote:

I absolutely love this thread - and thanks to those who made me chuckle.

I am a firm believer that part of our jobs as parents is to teach our children 'life skills'. As I have three boys it seems even more the case as somehow they never seem to 'see' what needs doing. Even when asked to do something, although they are very willing they often ask 'how' - even when it seem baltently obvious.
I put it down to the fact that my boys are doing extremly well in school - they must have gone in the 'academic' ability queue twice instead of getting some 'common sense' (As I typed this DS3 gave another classic 'male' behaviour - I'm busy typing and his pen runs out as he writes down an address - that he asked me to find even though he has access to it himself - and asks me if he can have another pen. I say yes - and he just stands there. What he meant was 'mother go find me another pen!! Honeslty, he is not lazy - he will do anything I ask of him (unlike DS2) but just doensn't get on and do things of his own accord!!!)

Kaz x

I can relate to what you are saying. My two eldest are academically talented - both always with a head in a book, but they aren't practical in the slightest. If I ask them to go and get something they can never find it even though it is in front of their noses. If I leave some of their things on the stairs they would walk past and not dream of taking them up.
I always have to ask them to do things, they would never dream of volunteering. I have to laugh cos I can remember feeling all put out when I was asked to do jobs at their age.
I sound like my mum now. I find myself saying "you're so lucky being off for 6 weeks in Summer" "you don't know you are born" "money doesn't grow on trees" etc
My youngest who is 3 has to tidy up his toys but he is more headstrong than the other two. Though having a naughty step certainly helps.
Regards
Anne