We have a big problem...

tinkerbell21

Thank you! I totally agree with you. If I had it all my way, I would most definitely be taking her to court. O just to clarify, we were just going to use the bank story to get her to admit the liability, not actually do it. Its the only way we could think of getting some solid proof.

You are right, she is a nasty piece of work, and I can't believe she is doing this to him.

I also forgot to say that she also decided that she doesnt have to pay the interest on the loan either!!!! So thats what hes paying for aswell. Absolutely ridiculous!!

sleepless_saver

Here's some information about the small claims track in England and Wales.

Rather than phoning, fiance should send a formal letter to her setting out the position (she got loan from him etc), the amount owing and what he wants her to do (i.e. start regular repayments within x days), ultimatum that if she does not act in the time specified, you will need to consider legal action. Keep a copy and send it signed for delivery, so that there is evidence that you have tried to get her to act before you think about the next step, which would be court action.

It won't do much for your relationship, but personally I wouldn't want to have much to do with someone who has been so untrustworthy and who was causing you and your fiance so much stress at a time which should be a happy one.

tinkerbell21

Thanks for the link, and for the advice.

I think I am going to have a serious talk with him about what we need to do. Tomorrow I am going to work out exactly how much she has paid, and how much she still owes (including the interest rate of course), and put it in writing like you said.

I think he is so reluctant because he his worried about not seeing his nieces or having her say she wont be able to buy food for them. I personally am not bothered anymore, I love her little girls to bits, but I cannot stand him being treated like this. He is being too nice after the way she has treated him. What would a court do if she claimed that did not have the money to pay back? Take it from her benefits?

What gets me even more is that she has planned a three week holiday in september, so where is the money coming from for that??

tinkerbell21

If anyone else has any more advice, that would be great xx

smartpicture

Frustrating as it is, you can't get blood out of a stone. Even if you could convince your fiance to take her to court (and remember, he has to do it, not you!), and even if you could prove it was a loan - the most that a court is likely to order would be £5 installments as she's on benefits.

Is it really worth damaging your relationship with your fiance and your neices for the sake of an insignificant amount that won't make much difference to your lives? I don't think so.

I speak as someone who has twice lent money to family / friends and been let down. Unless you have cast-iron proof and no desire to speak to these people ever again, then believe me, it's less stressful to just learn the lesson not to lend money to family or friends and move on. And chances are you'll end up with exactly the same amount of money either way.

j2009

If it was me I would be trying to settle the loan now and then worry about chasing the sister. I don't rate your chances of getting the money back so you are best off trying to limit your loss now.

If you borrow 8k over 5 years (ignoring PPI) and you repay at £260 the interest rate is c30%. This is as you describe sky high!

However, assuming your fiance has been repaying the £260 for 2.5 years the settlement figure for the loan should be c5.5k - the balance figure you quote is the total amount you will repay (from now) if you let the loan run the full term. Has your fiance called the loan company to get a settlement figure?

It is crazy paying 30% interest on the 4k that your fiance has in a high interest account which I suspect yields no more than 4%. Therefore, assuming your fiance has still got the 4k in the high interest account is there any way you can rob your wedding savings to fund the difference, and settle the loan (1.5k or so)?

This will of course not help pay for your wedding but once you get rid of this horrible loan you might be able to get a smaller (cheaper) loan elsewhere that you can repay at a more manageable level.

This is by no means a full step by step solution and may not suit your circumstances but it's what I'd be looking to do.... oh and I'd be looking to cut back on my wedding as much as possible so I don't get in a pickle over that too.

Optimisticpair

tinkerbell21 wrote: »

I think he is so reluctant because he his worried about not seeing his nieces or having her say she wont be able to buy food for them. I personally am not bothered anymore, I love her little girls to bits, but I cannot stand him being treated like this. He is being too nice after the way she has treated him. What would a court do if she claimed that did not have the money to pay back? Take it from her benefits?

What gets me even more is that she has planned a three week holiday in september, so where is the money coming from for that??

You have my sympathy. My ex-hubby lent a private loan and we scraped by with the same feelings as you have while his 'poor' family member went on holidays.

There is likely to be very natural resentment about this from you, and possibly him but hidden, as long as this goes on so I'd try get it resolved as soon as you can.

MoneyBags

Have you tried minding your own business? You didn't lend his sister anything - this is your partners concern - not yours.

Frankly - I'd be hopping mad to find my fiance online, plotting to take my sister to court.