Mortgage and equity advice for me and hubby who are splitting

Bossyboots

The courts are fair to both parties but how that applies to each couple is entirely individual and what is sound advice to one is not relevant to another. Full financial disclosure is needed of both parties' income and assets to establish what is the right thing to do.

The main desire of the courts is a clean break divorce which is fair to both parties, so that the couple no longer have any financial links at all in the future. (This is totally aside from child maintenance which is not a consideration for the actual financial split) This is best achieved by sale of the matrimonial property and if that is a feasible option, it should be done. It is not however possible or right for every couple to sell the home. Only individual circumstances can dictate whether that should be the case.

As a personal view, I can say that although the idea of one party recovering their share later on in years seems a sensible option at the time, it is a huge blow when it actually happens. The party living in the home must settle the ex's share if they cohabit or re-marry or when the youngest child finishes school. In my experience, the party in the house forgets that they need to do this and is poleaxed when they receive a demand from their ex or a solicitor to cough up. The net result seems to be that the house ends up being sold then, rather than at the point of divorce. It is not really a satisfactory solution to my mind and if you can make the financial split full and final now, I would urge you to do so.

ss1973, you may run into difficulty with the court with just accepting the 30% as the judge is almost certain to query how that can be fair to you. Make sure your consent order is drawn up clearly and concisely and the court is made aware when it is filed why you have agreed that settlement. That will avoid delays of the order coming back with queries from the court, which can drag out for ages how long things take to be finalised.

joepubli

Given the salary figures, I can't see how you cab avoid trading down. Your ex will need a house as well and given that he has a son and a daughter will probably need the same sort as you. He will also have two lots of child (and spouse?) maintenance to pay.

That would mean that the equity in the house would need to be used to provide both of you with as suitable a hiome as can be afforded.


Sorry to be not more positive but it is difficult when relationships break and what used to be enough for one home has to stretch to two - and the legal fees. From experience, don't blow what little there is to share on legal fees. Some lawyers love arguing but it is YOU (and your ex) who eventually pay for it.
Good luck
Joe

MortgageMamma

Joe thats a nice thing to say, and I agree with your sentiments entirely, sometimes a good counsellor can help facilitate a split fairly, and they come much more cheaply than solicitors.

To the OP, good luck and keep your chin up. you will be OK.