Lost all spirit and really depressed over this debt :(

beth3735

its a big fear for me is my kids seeing Debt around them.

I was brought up with my parents using store cards here and there, I have sat in the house while they have been on phone to companies demanding money, I have sat while they have been on phone to mortgage company while they were remortgaging to pay their debt only to get back into debt again

But I didnt look sensibly at it, I just saw the whole issue of "easy money" now my debts ( half is my Dads, in my name but he was 2nd card holder ) they are dragging me down and scare me that my girls will end up the same.

Maybe you are right though that I could try and teach them that its hard and horrible to be stuck like this and not to spend unless they have the money.

WASHER

dancingfairy wrote: »

Also I'm baffled by the whole - not letting your kids know you are in debt? why? they need to learn that they can't have Nike trainers, top of the range bicycles and go to Disneyland Paris etc - you'll be teaching them the value of money - that you have to budget for things and save up for things. And if they do find out that you are in debt then maybe you can explain to them that you went about things the wrong way and borrowed money and now you wished you'd saved up.
df

I'm going to disagree with you DF on this one, I wouldn't have wanted my children to know that I was in debt, some young children can't hold their own water never mind keep it quiet that mum has debt, the playground mums would just love that, and before the OP knows it, the world and his wife would know...I wouldn't tell the children, its nothing to be ashamed of having debt, but I wouldn't want everyone knowing about it. You could simply state to the children things are a little tight just now, as they are for most people.

I do agree with DF on Lloyds, do not phone them again, write to them, do not stress yourself out over this, you have paid them on time according the CCCS, they will not listen, they just want more money from you.

nikki2804

I know how the OP feels. MY OH had a CC and OD with Lloyds TSB. They wrote to him and told him he had a week to pay off his £1100 OD. Obviously he couldn't do this and they started imposing £10 a day charges for 10 days, then £20 per day charges. He couldn't do right for doing wrong.

In the end I phoned Lloyds (with OH's consent) and demanded a payment plan. She woman was an arogant cow to say the least (I work in a CC so understand what they have to deal with so I was very polite) she kept insisting that she would raise the unplanned OD resulting in yet more charges?? I kept on and on at her until she agreed that they would freeze the charges and set up a payment plan. They set up a 10 month plan paying (i think) £230 back. We completely and utterly confused them by overpaying (at the time we cold afford too) an cleared it in 8.

Seriously don't give up with them. The best feeling in the world is when you can tell them where exactly to stuff there accounts. Only write to them (recorded if possible incase of "lost" letters)

If you need to then go down the complaints route then ombudsman if needs be.

There is a way out and you will get there.

Good Luck.

beth3735

Ok I promise not to call them again lol.

I am feeling pretty lonely in it all though, I cant call and get upset on the phone to my parents as im sure they feel guilty enough as it is with me holding half of my debt for them.

I cant get upset and speak with my hubby about it as he has no feelings what so ever and blames it all on me, which it is my fault, but I have learnt, I just want some support and a way out.

So im feeling all by myself with it and sorry for myself at the moment. I should be fine tomorrow, I think just dealing with Lloyds today has taken it all out of me today.

best get kids, will take my mind off things for a bit at least.

Moneytroubles_2

Hi, myself and OH are also having issues with Lloyds TSB at the moment, I posted at the weekend asking for advice!
Basically OH has an O/D of around £3000 and has set up a payment plan with them, and they have froze his interest (well that was the plan) OH is always getting letters from them saying he has gone over his agreed overdraft, so he has to phone up to remind them of his payment plan, this has happened so many times now, and its so frustrating cos it just means the money he is paying is just being swallowed up by interest, he went into the branch and they said they couldnt do anything as it was for the collections department to deal with, its ridiculous! We are going down the financial ombudsman route!

Chin up together we'll beat them! and when we do we'll have great joy in closing all accounts and disassociating ourselves from them !! xx

Moneytroubles_2

Dont feel alone beth you have all of us

WASHER

:grouphug:.

I know it looks a bit dodgy, but I couldn't find another suitable one.

You are not alone in all of this, whatever you want, just post, it can be as random as you like, someone is always on the board.

WASHER.x.

dancingfairy

You're going to forming the Lloyds are useless society soon - with all your followers. Seriously - they do seem to have a reputation for being unhelpful.
df

beth3735

pmsl Washer but that icon made me literally LOL

Thank you all for your support, I have just spent an hour in park with the kids and didnt even think about Lloyds

Moneytroubles im sorry to hear you are having problems with them too, I will follow your progress with them too if you ever get some :S

Right im feeling better now, not as stressed! Will just keep doing as I have been for the past 3 years and hopefully I will owe them so much one day that they have no choice but to sell my debts on, so I can get a nice full and final settlement

longforthesun

Beth3735 I am not sure if my story can help but here goes.

OH and I are on a DMP (we are going it alone but were with CCCS) My Lloyds CC was around £4500. As far as I know they have not defaulted me (not checked my credit file since march) but have noted I have an arangement to pay. No Interest has been added since about October of last year. The reason I think for this is I sent them a request for a copy of my signed Credit Agreement. They sent me a load of rubbish and I wrote to them telling them this. I still havent had a correct agreement but all of a sudden the charges ect stopped. We only started our DMP in July 2008 and by october 08 lloyds stopped the interest and charges.

Have you requested a copy of your agreement?

Again I would reiterate what others have said don't waste your time and energy phoning them keep everything in writing that we you have a paper trail.