getting dragged down

deepinit

Hi everyone,


I'm just after advice never been on anything like this before, we have just had our first child and with the cost of child care, both working weekends without child care, we feel its best for my wife to finish work, so that now puts us in a tricky spot with the amount of debt we both have which is about £60,000 unsecure cards, loans and overdrafts we've managed to keep upto date with all payments but also in negative equity fo about another £50,000 so can't take anything out on house, been told to go on a DMP but with so many firms out there costing from £300 - FREE don't know what to do been in contact with CCCS but don't really fancy sending loads of letters out and getting phone calls, letters etc because of the shifts and type of work i do need rest,
also spending time with the new star in our lifes, I think its also to with being scared of the people ringing up.

Any advice would be great

Deepinit

tiny_courageous

First thing I would say is that you've come to the best place for advice. First thing would be to post an SOA (statement of affairs) so people can see where you are financially and advise from there. The most important part of all of this is your gorgeous child so be brutally honest with the people on here and they will definitely guide you in the right direction

An09

Debt on one's shoulders really makes it difficult to really enjoy the more important things in life, and I know firsthand how tough it is. But I'm not sure if I quite understood when you said your "wife to finish work". Do you mean because of not being able to afford child care, it's best for your wife to not work. If this is the case, do you have any relatives that can help take care of your child while you both work? Or can your wife do something from home whether on the internet or contract out for work that can be done from home. This might be an ideal way to add to your family income to help reduce your debt and have your child taken care of at the sametime. Sometimes we just have to make our own way and be creative in getting out of a financial mess.

piglet39

First of all welcome to the board - you have come to the right place. Everyone here is going through or has been through a myriad of debt worries.

First thing you need to do is post up an SOA - statement of affairs. The link to this is in the sticky at the top of the first page of this particular board.

Equally important - don't pay anyone to sort your debts. CCCS, National Debtline and Payplan are all charities that will all do this for free and are just as effective if not more tbh than one of these companies that you pay. You will initially get phone calls/letters from creditors whether you pay a debt management company or not so prepare yourself for a tricky few months whilst you get things sorted with one of the debt charities.

Others will be along shortly to help but we need to see an SOA first.

Hugs

Piglet

Keeping_Positive

Hello

First off have a look at http://www.entitledto.co.uk/ to see if you are getting all the benefits you are entitled to with your wife working and what you could get without.

Then do an SOA (try this site http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html ) for both situations so you have a clear picture. No need to post on here if you dont want to but peeps can give good advice.

CCCS and other debt free charities are the way to go for a dmp. Try CCCS web site. They have an online debt remedy calculation that gives advice - just google CCCS.

As others have said DO NOT PAY for help

Good luck and dont stress about phonecalls. Advice on here can get you through. The peeps on the other end generally dont know what they are talking about just there to pressure you into paying money you dont have to.

beth3735

Hi I would definatly try the CCCS, I was worried and scared at first with the idea of getting hounded with calls and letters, I didnt get too many if im truely honest, and now all I get is the normal monthly statements. It is as scarey as they sound, Plus the CCCS do all the letter sending.

With regards to the Baby, I dont think its right people saying why have a baby when deepinit, as If people waited till they were debt free then they would be too old to start with Babies. Congrats on the new baby.

If I was your Wife, I would stop the working if you are having to fork out for child care, and I would definatly recommend her to look at becoming a childminder at home if she enjoys child care herself? When I had my 1st daughter I did a part time short course which meant I could register as a childminder, Did all the checks and then worked full time at home so no need to pay for child care for my daughter too.

Its good money too.

Sorry not much help, but just thought I would put some ideas in, anyways welcome

deepinit

Cheers for the advice everyone done a SOA works out i have about £300 spare each month if i dont work overtime, is it worth working overtime? would i have to tell the people managing my DMP that i've earned extra money and split that or keep it for unexpected bills etc.... sometime can alot of money in overtime or should i put this into my earning from the start? If i hide it is it being like a thief???

cheers

imindebttoo

Hi deepinit

The most important thing is to deal with the debt you currently have - it's true that emergency bills / unexpected costs get us all sometimes - however, CCCS and Payplan are there to ensure that your DMP succeeds, and will make allowances for such expenditure as and when things crop up.

It is important to understand, no matter how you manage you debt problem whether by yourself or with assistance, that it is your debt problem, your money and your expenditure (and your DMP if you're in one). So, if you are struggling to pay because the car's blown up one month - then communicate this to the lender. If you're using the free debt management organisations - tell them - and they will communicate this for you to the lender.

It can be very hard to be pragmatic when debt problems are whispering in your ear every day - however, try and deal with the 'actuals' not the 'what ifs' to begin with.

With regards to overtime - unless it's a regular guaranteed amount, then you shouldn't include it as part of your regular income.

IIDT

Nargleblast

Suggest you make a start with the statement of affairs using the SOA calculator at the top of the forum. You will then have your situation down in black and white, and we can make suggestions for trimming costs. The issue with your child - whatever the rights and wrongs of having children when in debt, the baby is here now and has to be factored into the equation. It is also a good motivator for you to sort your debt situation out. Next - get those scissors out and cut up all credit and charge cards NOW - you will have to do that anyway when entering into a debt repayment structure, so why not do it now and make this the start of getting your life back! Then get your figures together and contact one of the debt counselling charities.

deepinit

Thanks for all your advive been in touch with payplan who have gone through everything with me and told us an IVA is the way to go down due to having about £400 spare each month. So the overtime question is now out of the way and we'll have to learn to live on a budget very quickly, I think this could be the best way forward as a DMP would of taken about 15 years to finish paying off

Thanks again for your help

Nargleblast

Keep us posted with how things are going -- you will get there in the end!